Worst TV football pundit?

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Worst TV football pundit

  • Mark Lawrenson

    Votes: 12 4.9%
  • Alan Hansen

    Votes: 5 2.1%
  • Andy Townsend

    Votes: 51 21.0%
  • Robbie Savage

    Votes: 37 15.2%
  • Clark Carlisle

    Votes: 32 13.2%
  • Roy Keane

    Votes: 6 2.5%
  • Gary Neville

    Votes: 1 0.4%
  • Jamie Redknapp

    Votes: 1 0.4%
  • Michael Owen

    Votes: 34 14.0%
  • Alan Shearer

    Votes: 14 5.8%
  • Other (please state)

    Votes: 31 12.8%
  • Jamie Carragher

    Votes: 19 7.8%

  • Total voters
    243








W.C.

New member
Oct 31, 2011
4,927
Michael Owen is pretty new to the game isn't he? If he wasn't I reckon he might be challenging Andy Townsend for the crown. He is bloody awful. As are most of them really. Can't stand the jobs for the boys matey blokeyness they indulge in all the time. Lawrenson's 'couldn't care less' attitude is irritating too. Arrgh it's too hard.
 










Machiavelli

Well-known member
Oct 11, 2013
16,743
Fiveways
The answer is obvious -- to me, at least. Step forward Alan Shearer. Never before has someone said so much, to so many, to contribute so little. Utterly devoid of insight. And he looks like either Ross Kemp, a baked bean, or both.
 










yxee

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2011
2,521
Manchester
Alan Green. Loses his wig at every remotely poor decision and talks with an air of authority that doesn't correspond to his remarks. Infuriating
 








Codner's Crackpipe

Active member
Feb 25, 2005
184
I agree that Ron had to go for his uncharacteristic yet unforgiveable racist outburst, but up until that point he was THE DADDY of punditry with some incredible terminology the like of which we haven't seen since. A brief flavour:

Early Doors, Spotter's Badge, Full Gun, Little Eyebrows, Back Stick, Lollipop, Crowd Scene, Going Down By Instalments, Tell You What Clive

I miss Big Ron's analysis (the bits where he knew the mike was on anyway). A proper amusement arcade of a pundit.
 




Drimble Wedge

New member
Apr 20, 2013
27
Seven Dials
Jamie Redknapp's criminal misuse of the word 'literally' (I quote 'Michael Owen is literally a greyhound Ruud', 'the way Gerrards floated in that ball, he's literally given the defender a hair-cut'...?) and persistent knack of missing the point discussed by colleagues Souness and Carragher but refusing to pipe down particularly grates on me.
 


Screaming J

He'll put a spell on you
Jul 13, 2004
2,368
Exiled from the South Country
On to the poll then. I admit I have sat on my sofa open-mouthed at the catastrophoc landslide of boulder-shaped 24-carat DRIVEL which erupts forth from that odd, over-gesticulating shambles known as Garth Crooks. This is a man so grotesquely bloated with his own sense of self-importance, and enlightening, razor-sharp perception of the game, that every one of his questions is framed in the manner of an extensive, tedious droning monologue about pension reform from a minor minister at a Tory party conference. This will usually result in a one-word answer, "yes" or "no". That is if the interviewee hasn't already collapsed through malnourishment halfway through, or has simply given up the will to live.

This is why I voted 'Other'. Garth Crooks is a cosmic buffoon.
 


Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,276
Surrey
Had Chiles been included in the poll he would have certainly got my vote, shows remarkably little insight for someone who is apparently a huge football fan (though I suppose the same could be said of many supporters!).
As with most people, especially football pundits, a move to ITV has served to massively reduce his talents. Chiles was perfectly decent on MOTD2 back in the day, but is now a fat mong.

Mark Lawrenson is the Dimitar Berbatov of commentary. He can be good when he can be bothered, but that's only 10% of the time.
Superb parallel drawn there, great work.

One more note on the total thicket that is Andy Townsend. Most commentators sound a little odd when their voices are heard on FIFA computer games because they are often out of context and necessarily broad and therefore uninsightful. However, Townsend's banal, bland drivel translates perfectly - when you play FIFA 14, you can imagine him saying the exact same banal, bland drivel in a real football match.
 


Bwian

Kiss my (_!_)
Jul 14, 2003
15,898
Add me to the Mark Palace Tw@t Bright should be the only contender in this contest list. The man is an oxygen thief and his supply should be cut off immediately.
 






rcf0712

Out Here In The Perimeter
Feb 26, 2009
2,428
Perth, Western Australia
Tommy "Auld Onion Bag" Smyth (ESPN) and Mark Bosnich (Foxtel), what a couple of twats
Tommy Smyth.jpgMB.jpg:tosser::tosser:
 


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