Top Sitcom line of all time

[IndependentWSU]

"What did you expect to see out of a Torquay bedroom window?"

Thundering wilderbeast,
Hanging gardens of Babylon

 

[Withdeano]

"The thing about boobs is that you can push them together to make them look like a bottom"

Men Behaving Badly

 

[FamilyGuy]

"These ones are small, those are far away".

Beat me to it!

 

[Pixelated Penguin]

"God created Man in the image of himself, and it would be a sad lookout for Christians throughout the Globe if he looked anything like you Baldrick". Blackadder.

 

[Stumpy Tim]

Father Ted Over 70' 5-a-side episode. Mrs Doyles, "ooh, where did he come from!" line creases me up every time

 

[Razzoo]

There was a bit in The Simpsons that made me laugh, Lisa is throttling Bart and Homer intervenes and takes over. "Stop it Lisa... You're hands are too weak".

 

[Simster]

"No luck then Ted?" Father Dougal, shortly after something good happens to Ted.

 

[Grombleton]

Rimmer: I'm a competitive man, Kryten. Always have been. That's what makes me what I am.
Kryten: We're all perfectly well aware of what you are, sir.

 

[Barrow Boy]

first ep of porridge:

Doctor: Can you fill that up for me?
Fletch: what, from here?

Classic!
And from that same episode while Fletch & Godber are waiting in line for their medicals, Godber hears the questions the Doctor is asking everyone and turns to Fletch,

Godber: What's a practising homosexual Fletch?
Fletch: That's one who hasn't got it quite right yet!

And a bit further on Fletch is trying to wangle a cushy job in the prison library by pretending he's got flat feet,

Doctor: Are you a practising homosexual?
Fletch: What with these feet?

 

[Hillian1]

Classic!
And from that same episode while Fletch & Godber are waiting in line for their medicals, Godber hears the questions the Doctor is asking everyone and turns to Fletch,

Godber: What's a practising homosexual Fletch?
Fletch: That's one who hasn't got it quite right yet!

And a bit further on Fletch is trying to wangle a cushy job in the prison library by pretending he's got flat feet,

Doctor: Are you a practising homosexual?
Fletch: What with these feet?

Doc: See that beaker over there, I want you to fill it.
Fletcher: What, from here?

 

[father_and_son]

Not the best of all time but it makes me smile everytime

Basil Fawlty: Hello?... Ah, yes Mr O'Reilly, well it's perfectly simple. When I asked you to build me a wall I was rather hoping that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile you might have found time to cement them together... you know, one on top of another, in the traditional fashion.

Later in the Episode:

O'Reilly: If the Lord God...
Basil (*interupts*): ...is mentioned one time time, I'll move you closer to him!

 

[BadFish]

Mark Corrigan: Ugh, baby. Note to self, re: being the Fonz, Mark you are not the Fonz.

 

[gripper stebson]

If we are including The Simpsons I must add this:

The Springfield Meltdowns are playing in the big game. Carl and Lenny are at Moe's supporting the team...

Lenny - "I've got Melt Mania!"

Carl - "I've got Downs Syndrome"

My fave from The Office. Brent is playing guitar during the training day. Tim ambles round and says to the camera and says- "He went home to get it." Brilliantly sums up Brent in that one line.

 

[Spider]

The one where he was in a bar with Trigger and tried to be cool when he spotted some women and fell through the bar.

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[Lower West Stander]

From Ali G in one of his discussion shows:-

" I can't believe we've all watched Animal Farm!"

Sort of a sitcom

 

[The Buttery Biscuit Base]

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That sums up 'Fools' for me...

This is my Favourite, not really a line...

 

[Kumquat]

Glad I started this thread now. Some classsics in there. Glad to see so many references to Porridge. One of my favourites was the one where Godber is doing his Geography O Level inside and Fletcher launches a diatribe to the other inmates saying how he's the first person to get a qualification in the nick since that bloke who got one in Spanish, then pauses going "what was his name?? oh yeah, Gomez, that was it!"

 

[LU7 RED]

Back on Blackadder goes forth - about the xmas day football match.

This is loosely right..

Baldrick - 'Yeah, I'll always remember that'
Blackadder - 'How can I forget it! I was NEVER offside'

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

From Steptoe and Son: "You'd get on the Archbishop of Canterbury's tits, you would."

And in one episoe, when they are clearing out a house, Old man Steptoe, on seeing the headline on an old newspaper laid under the carpet, and with genuine sadness in his voice: Here, Gandhi's dead"..... this probably 20 years after gandhi had died.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

"What did you expect to see out of a Torquay bedroom window?"

And from the same bit:
I asked for a Sea view.
Yes, I think you'll find that's the sea over there, between the land and the sky.