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[Albion] Garth Crooks (made-up) Team of the Week 2023/24



Bozza

You can change this
Helpful Moderator
Jul 4, 2003
55,982
Back in Sussex
Game Week 1 and Albion have yet to get going...


Screenshot 2023-08-15 at 18.07.17.png
 






Westdene Seagull

aka Cap'n Carl Firecrotch
NSC Patron
Oct 27, 2003
21,214
The arse end of Hangleton
Took his time reading the red tops this week didnt he.
To be fair to Crooks ( yes, I know ! ) he published this before the papers came out. Strange he put Lemina in as Wolves lost and he never puts in players from losing teams.
 








WATFORD zero

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 10, 2003
26,318
Bob Wilson, Alan Hansen, Mark Lawrenson, Andy Gray, Jamie Redknapp, Tony Cottee, Alan Smith, Andy Townsend, Tim Sherwood, Jim Beglin, Trevor Brooking all no worse but gone, and somehow Crooks survives :shrug:

And I checked Bob and Trevor are still with us before I posted that :thumbsup:
 


LamieRobertson

Not awoke
Feb 3, 2008
47,208
SHOREHAM BY SEA
Bob Wilson, Alan Hansen, Mark Lawrenson, Andy Gray, Jamie Redknapp, Tony Cottee, Alan Smith, Andy Townsend, Tim Sherwood, Jim Beglin, Trevor Brooking all no worse but gone, and somehow Crooks survives :shrug:

And I checked Bob and Trevor are still with us before I posted that :thumbsup:
Good team of the week that
 














Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Patron
May 8, 2007
12,864
Toronto
March and Mitoma made the cut this week.

Standard fare for Solly's write-up. Spend half the time talking about the opposition and don't mention what exactly he did to make the team.

Solly March (Brighton): Wolves suffered a terrible injustice against Manchester United, but what took place at Molineux in the opening 10 minutes of the second half against a rampant Brighton wasn't just alarming, but cause for real concern.

Newly appointed manager Gary O'Neil had inherited all the confidence and motivation his predecessor Julen Lopetegui could have given his team prior to his surprise departure. All that seemed to evaporate minutes into the second half when the Seagulls ripped Wolves apart.

Solly March epitomised the drive and determination shown by the team from the south coast and his goals were worthy rewards for his efforts.



Then there's Kaoru...

Kaoru Mitoma (Brighton): What a goal. The run, control and quality of finish against Wolves were world-class. In fact Mitoma has been producing this type of form with such regularity that I can't believe he's still on the south coast.

Manchester United have Jadon Sancho and Antony in their ranks and I haven't seen anything like the quality or ability from either of those two players that I have seen from this lad. How do United get it so wrong?

I accept that Old Trafford is a daunting stage and the stakes are much higher there, but Mitoma is a United player if ever I saw
one.


Christ on a bike. Even by Garth's incredibly low standards that's laughable. He's a Brighton player, you absolute tool.
 








Couldn't Be Hyypia

We've come a long long way together
NSC Patron
Nov 12, 2006
15,953
Near Dorchester, Dorset
Girth Crooks in disrespect shocker.

If it's not Line-acre selling off Evan, it's Girth touting Mitoma. It's plain disrespectful. You can't criticise Brighton for "selling off the crown jewels, that will inevitably lead to a Southampton like relegation" and simultaneously be suggesting our players would be at "bigger" clubs.

What a lazy prick.
 


HastingsSeagull

Well-known member
Jan 13, 2010
9,341
BGC Manila
If these two goons keep touting our players out to ‘bigger clubs’, maybe we need a petition to tout their jobs out to someone with more twitter/x/insta/tiktok followers than them? Let’s face it some no-mark influencer could probably have more non-big-six knowledge than either of them
 


Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
15,093


HastingsSeagull

Well-known member
Jan 13, 2010
9,341
BGC Manila
Garth Crooks -

Astrid Wett is a modern influencer, although quite what that means is often unclear. Utilizing a variety of social media apps and outlets, Wett seems to have the following of a younger generation with or without her Chelsea shirt on. Recently of note, she has also been a talking point of many post-middle-aged men on football forum NorthStandChat which focuses primarily on Brighton and Hove Albion but also general news and issues that affect it’s loyal users.

Brighton are a club currently topping the Premier League table who have so far shown they can sell players for huge money and continue to prove imbecile pundits wrong. Knowledgeable, tactically astute and with flair oozing from every pore Brighton manager Roberto DeZerbi recently claimed “I think the big Club can buy the players but they can't buy our soul and our spirit”.

Garth Crooks is 65 years old and claims to watch football.
 




Icy Gull

Back on the rollercoaster
Jul 5, 2003
72,015
'A United player if ever I've seen one' 🫠 meaningless bullshit.
He’s not been paying attention. Keep his form up and Chelsea is the destination for Brighton’s player of the season each Summer. United can’t afford them
 


Hamilton

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
12,644
Brighton
If these two goons keep touting our players out to ‘bigger clubs’, maybe we need a petition to tout their jobs out to someone with more twitter/x/insta/tiktok followers than them? Let’s face it some no-mark influencer could probably have more non-big-six knowledge than either of them
Yep. Garth Crooks, I can’t believe he’s still at the BBC. He’s an Argus reporter if ever I saw one.*


*and that’s unfair on the Argus.
 


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