Coldplay album review - nastiest review ever?

[Easy 10]

Got bored reading that after about the 15th f***ing, and gave up.

I love a good rant, especially one with a few colourful metaphors thrown in to describe your dislike of something. But using the f-word word 3 or 4 times in every sentence ? Thats not a review, its just a tiresome tirade by someone who had clearly made up their own minds on the album before even playing it.

 

[Cosmic Joker]

NME's review of George Michael's Listen Without Prejudice album

"Listen without speakers"

 

[brakespear]

All this Coldplay hate is very dull and boring now. They have made some brilliant songs that have enhanced many people's lives. Live and let live.

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

I met Chris Martin in the kitchen at a mates house a while back. Seemed like a nice bloke. I think he was unconsciously coupling with Gwyneth at that point.

She wasn't in the kitchen though. Well, not that I noticed.

Unless she was dressed up as my mate.

That's enough from me.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Why the facepalm ? Ok, you hate them, we get it but lots of people love them and their songs. Is that too hard to understand ? Apparently so.

 

[ElectricNaz]

Whoever reviewed that is definitely trying too hard. Was tolerable for about three sentences.

 

[Norman Potting]

Wonder what this critic finds it cool to like? Like many bands some of their stuff is worth a listen, some not.

 

[Man of Harveys]

Got bored reading that after about the 15th f***ing, and gave up.

I love a good rant, especially one with a few colourful metaphors thrown in to describe your dislike of something. But using the f-word word 3 or 4 times in every sentence ? Thats not a review, its just a tiresome tirade by someone who had clearly made up their own minds on the album before even playing it.

A friend of mine knows some people involved with that Quietus website; he sometimes/often talks/rants just like that review but is great value.

I don't wish to be unkind, but assuming that they're cut from a similar cloth (and they may well not be): think along the lines of nice but slightly angry middle-aged men (definitely all blokes) who think that they sh1t out cool but actually have IT degrees. Very "try too hard", very the old school playground "you don't like THEM do you, what's wrong with you?" routine.

Given that I liked the first, quieter Coldplay album but don't like their recent stadium rock stuff since then, that review saying it's about him splitting up with that awful Paltrow woman means I'm actually rather more likely to go and buy it.

 

[spring hall convert]

Why the facepalm ? Ok, you hate them, we get it but lots of people love them and their songs. Is that too hard to understand ? Apparently so.

I'm with you here US. Coldplay were never really my cup of tea but even I would acknowledge there was plenty to like about their first couple of albums. Even since then they've cropped up with the odd catchy single.

There's a hell of lot worse out there.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

I will go along with the "I'm no great Coldplay fan" thing. Middle of the road putrid banality.

But that is just puerile and pathetic. It might have been less so with fewer "effs" in it, but probably not.

 

[Wozza]

Given that I liked the first, quieter Coldplay album but don't like their recent stadium rock stuff since then, that review saying it's about him splitting up with that awful Paltrow woman means I'm actually rather more likely to go and buy it.

Aye. It's much closer to the first album than the fairly awful Mylo Xyloto.

 

[Mellotron]

Wonder what this critic finds it cool to like? Like many bands some of their stuff is worth a listen, some not.

They're so cool they listen to bands that don't even exist yet.

 

[John Bumlick]

So, let me get this straight. People who don't like Coldplay don't like Coldplay because they are trying to be cool and it's got nothing to do with not actually liking Coldplay?

I do not like Coldplay but this opinion does not prevent anyone else from liking or listening to Coldplay.

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

i used to hate coldplay but now i think they're quite good. so either they've got better or my taste in music has got worse

 

[Badger]

So, let me get this straight. People who don't like Coldplay don't like Coldplay because they are trying to be cool and it's got nothing to do with not actually liking Coldplay?

I do not like Coldplay but this opinion does not prevent anyone else from liking or listening to Coldplay.

I think Dara O'Briain sums it up quite nicely

 

[Deadly Danson]

So, let me get this straight. People who don't like Coldplay don't like Coldplay because they are trying to be cool and it's got nothing to do with not actually liking Coldplay?

I do not like Coldplay but this opinion does not prevent anyone else from liking or listening to Coldplay.

I think the difference is that people seem to fall over themselves to announce they don't like Coldplay like it's a badge of honour. There are tons of bands I don't like but I don't seek out threads to tell the world, I just don't listen to them. And frankly I couldn't give a shit if it's cool or uncool to like Coldplay.

 

[blue'n'white]

Best ( and shortest) review I ever read was for the album "Poet fool or bum" by Lee Hazelwood. Written by Charles Shaar Murray it consisted of the word "Bum" !

 

[GreersElbow]

Is that a review or just verbal diarrhea thinking it'll be ultra LOL swearing loads and saying he'd rather do x instead of listening to them?

Anyone can do that.

 

[kevo]

Judging by comments made ny the Quietus editor, the review was meant to be a pastiche of the type of scathing reviews that used to be appear in the music press. I think that went over people's heads somewhat though. The album is apparently completely gash.

 

[DJ Leon]

That's just plain embarrassing.