[Albion] Just for fun - prospect pun signings

[Herr Tubthumper]

A Whiteman - Another Burnley signing.

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Buck King - USA red card collector

 

[El Sid]

Farcov Utwat

Moldovian verbally attacking midfielder who suffers from Tourettes. Poor disciplinary record. Regularly sent off for dissent.

 

[Rambo]

Bernd Da Bridges - Dutch centre back who can’t seem to get a club anywhere.

 

[hart's shirt]

Goalkeeper

Wade Moore - Northern journeyman who's had multiple disagreements with club nutritionists


Wing-Backs

Serge A. Head - pacy French-Canadian wingback

Felix Ited - perpetually nervous Portuguese winger/wingback


Centre-Backs

Levi Tate - tall Israeli stopper with famed aerial prowess. "He just seems to hang there," said an opposing forward.

Gerry Atrick - aging Irish centre-half with the dubious honour of scoring 3 own goals in a single match

Rex Carr - young Welsh player who's been recently banned from driving


Midfielders

Max E. Mumm - tireless Belgian box-to-box player that always gives 110%

Mustafa Pas - Turkish central midfielder. 312 league appearances, 0 goals.

Lee Vitout - fiery Dutch ball-winner frequently booked for dissent


Forwards

Ivan Akikov - Azerbaijani target man with the outfield player record of fewest touches (1) during a full match.

Stan Dupp - Ivory Coast qualified poacher who is frequently known to dive on the slightest contact

 

[Superphil]

Gudal Susbytheesee Indian midfielder with ready made chant.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Snail Stephens - slow midfielder.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Owen Goal - Brighton number 5.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Na Kerred – always in the physio's room

S'cape Gurt – decent enough midfielder, but gets the blame after every game, regardless of how he performs

Brick Woll – Austrian international who's a rock at the heart of the defence.

 

[Pavilionaire]

Neal Andpray - French shitehouse deadline day signing from the Championship.

 

[autopsyturvey]

Pete Zahut - well, he was good for four seasons

 

[MJsGhost]

Mustafa Loanspell. We'll, we don't buy them PL ready, do we?

 

[TugWilson]

Twin brothers Imahl and Juan , both strikers ,not very good ,apparently if you`ve seen Juan you`ve seen Imahl ! .

 

[portlock seagull]

Pete Zahut - well, he was good for four seasons

 

[portlock seagull]

Goalkeeper

Wade Moore - Northern journeyman who's had multiple disagreements with club nutritionists


Wing-Backs

Serge A. Head - pacy French-Canadian wingback

Felix Ited - perpetually nervous Portuguese winger/wingback


Centre-Backs

Levi Tate - tall Israeli stopper with famed aerial prowess. "He just seems to hang there," said an opposing forward.

Gerry Atrick - aging Irish centre-half with the dubious honour of scoring 3 own goals in a single match

Rex Carr - young Welsh player who's been recently banned from driving


Midfielders

Max E. Mumm - tireless Belgian box-to-box player that always gives 110%

Mustafa Pas - Turkish central midfielder. 312 league appearances, 0 goals.

Lee Vitout - fiery Dutch ball-winner frequently booked for dissent


Forwards

Ivan Akikov - Azerbaijani target man with the outfield player record of fewest touches (1) during a full match.

Stan Dupp - Ivory Coast qualified poacher who is frequently known to dive on the slightest contact

Brilliant!

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Pan Ik Bai - A last-minute addition, coming in from the Cambodian second division (automatically loaned to USG until January).

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

Trent Teegul

A mysterious figure that will need to justify his huge price tag

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

Harry Zontal

Tricky winger from south east London who often downs tools