Bell Cheeses at work

[¡Cereal Killer!]

Used to work with one guy who would talk all day about politics, he was a Torie boy who was in his early twenties but acted like Boris Johnson. Having to work with him for 14 hours a weekend was tedious to say the least.
I once had a conversation with him and he said he will be voting for UKIP at the next election, right after having a moan up about not being able to get his Colombian wife a visa to live and work here.

 

[TSB]

I'm currently seconded to another team who are struggling due to high volumes of work coinciding with lots of holiday/sickness. They work through queues of electronic scans general customer service queries. In helping them out I've realised three things...

1. The people who are left are taking the piss and "dropping" anything they don't fancy doing.
2. What they don't fancy doing is anything and everything remotely out if the ordinary.
3. I have disliked the individuals for a long time for their tedious personalities, and now I can add their work ethics to the list.

The worst thing is these people have all been here for 10+ years, and they're all on decent money having had 2 pay rises a year plus south east living allowance through the mad 90s. They've probably been getting away with this shit for years but the supervision is minimal and they know how to play the game.

Meanwhile muggins here is doing them a favour and doing a better job, but getting lumped with all the nonsense and paid significantly less for the pleasure. Ain't it always the way?

This sounds a lot like an experience I had at Legal & General in Hove

Sounds more like Legal & General Kingswood to me...

 

[MissGull]

Why is there always a complete knob at work, who the boss never sees through all their bullshit and somehow gets promoted to your level, whilst also being an incompetent 'gets away with murder' type ****.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

for our brother in need [MENTION=6625]Badger[/MENTION]

 

[Badger]

for our brother in need @Badger

Excellent, I do like this thread. So to recap from the other thread, there's a woman who sits opposite me who sounded like DEATH yesterday afternoon and got sent home early, then she turned up first thing this morning sounding EXACTLY the same, if not worse.

Fat bitch. She is FAT, right? I think you need to ressurect the 'bell cheeses at work' thread...

No, she is actually quite TIDY although she has a slightly irritating voice (not as irritating as the woman next to her, I'll come to her later). There has been a development in the last few seconds though, her boss is forcing her to go home and go to bed of course all the germs have already been spread around the office.

Moving on to the other woman, she only works 10.30 - 4.30, I'm pretty sure the main reason for this is the fact she has a horse. I know this because she goes on about her F***ING horse ALL THE TIME, I know all the intimate details about how she's had to move it to 3 different stables in the last month because she didn't get on with owners or didn't approve of some of the other clientèle. She says this with the most whiny voice, a voice which can only really be used for complaining about things.

Oh and of course there is a FATTY in the corner who I can hear CACKLING every now and again.

People are allowed to bring their dogs into my office too, don't get me started on that...

 

[hans kraay fan club]

People are allowed to bring their dogs into my office too, don't get me started on that...

My boss brings his DOG to work, too.

I don't really like dogs, although this one isn't too bad. It does harrass other people, who have made the mistake in the past of showing it ANY attention, as it thinks they will appreciate it LICKING them, rummaging through their bin, and dropping a BALL at their feet. Fortunately the DOG and I have an understanding, whereby I refuse to acknowledge that it exists, so it ignores me.

That obviously doesn't make me immune to being able to SMELL the thing when its wet, hear the thing noisily lapping up its water, or from finding the occasional dog HAIR on my desk.

I might get a SNAKE and start bring that in with me every day.

 

[Badger]

My boss brings his DOG to work, too.

I don't really like dogs, although this one isn't too bad. It does harrass other people, who have made the mistake in the past of showing it ANY attention, as it thinks they will appreciate it LICKING them, rummaging through their bin, and dropping a BALL at their feet. Fortunately the DOG and I have an understanding, whereby I refuse to acknowledge that it exists, so it ignores me.

That obviously doesn't make me immune to being able to SMELL the thing when its wet, hear the thing noisily lapping up its water, or from finding the occasional dog HAIR on my desk.

I might get a SNAKE and start bring that in with me every day.

I see you've taken the same approach as me, the dogs steer clear of me because I haven't shown the slightest bit of interest in any of them and thankfully there's a row of desks acting as a buffer between me and where the dogs normally are. As you say though, it doesn't stop you noticing them, one in particular is on a diet at the moment so as soon as anyone is eating he starts HOWLING and WHIMPERING to try and get fed. Of course the dog lovers reactions are along the lines of "aww isn't he cute" and "the poor little fella" as opposed to "SHUT UP you stupid animal".

The snake idea is interesting though...

 

[strings]

Been handed a small promotion, which has involved being moved out of the big office and into a side-office, which I share with one person.

This is another person with 'thermostat issues'. This morning the office was boiling, why...? Because he has a fan heater on full blast. This afternoon, the windows are open to cool down the office.

Just leave the heating arrangements alone!! That way everyone will be comfortable all of the time. I am seriously starting to pack work clothes to cover summer heat and a winter freeze - all for one day at work!

Yours, in chilliness,

strings

 

[WhingForPresident]

Dogs in the office, jesus that brings back memories of my last job. Working for a sports website, interviewing very important people whilst dogs sniffed and bit at my feet and started attacking each other was a common occurence. One particular employee decided that it was appropriate to bring in her mangey old dog that could barely see and walked into everything. It pissed and shit everywhere literally every day to coos of "aw poor thing" and the like.

My utter dickhead bosses got all offended if we bought in our own tea and coffee, despite the fact i could feel my kidneys eroding with every Asda smartprice instant coffee i forced down. The smell of their Rosemary Conley ready meals mixed with dog shit/piss, the actual smell of dogs and coffee that a homeless persom would turn down was ****ing vomit inducing.

I have no idea how or why i stayed there for almost a year.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

My utter dickhead bosses got all offended if we bought in our own tea and coffee, despite the fact i could feel my kidneys eroding with every Asda smartprice instant coffee i forced down. The smell of their Rosemary Conley ready meals as well.. ****ing vomit inducing.

I have no idea how or why i stayed there for almost a year.

Oh, that's another thing - hot food at your desk. They can **** right off with that. Stinking the sodding place out. Eat a proper meal in the evening like NORMAL people, and eat a sandwich or something at lunchtime. Or better still **** off out of the office altogether for an hour to give the rest of us a break from you.

 

[Dr. Notthenineo'clocknews]

Sounds more like Legal & General Kingswood to me...

Was Ralfie that bad?

 

[Badger]

Oh, that's another thing - hot food at your desk. They can **** right off with that. Stinking the sodding place out. Eat a proper meal in the evening like NORMAL people, and eat a sandwich or something at lunchtime. Or better still **** off out of the office altogether for an hour to give the rest of us a break from you.

I can never understand people who just sit at their desks for an hour browsing the web at lunch time. Fair enough if it's raining you don't really want to go outside, but I take every opportunity to go for a walk at lunch time, it's good exercise and during the winter it's the only bit of daylight you get to experience. I'd go mad if I just sat at my desk for the entire day, every day.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

I can never understand people who just sit at their desks for an hour browsing the web at lunch time. .

Nor me. There's 8 other hours in the working day for that shit.

 

[Goring Gull]

I can never understand people who just sit at their desks for an hour browsing the web at lunch time. Fair enough if it's raining you don't really want to go outside, but I take every opportunity to go for a walk at lunch time, it's good exercise and during the winter it's the only bit of daylight you get to experience. I'd go mad if I just sat at my desk for the entire day, every day.

I agree with this i just have to get out at lunchtime I'll even brave a monsoon as if I try and stay at my desk i have a stream of Morons asking me questions they or their team leaders should know the awnser to and i have to politely awnser when all i feel like is giving them a stream of sarcasm that invariably goes over their heads anyway. The other alternative is to use the canteen area which is even worse as i always get someone who is disullionsioned enough to think i'm interested in some fecking "highly amusing" video on you tube or some other non entity of a humour website and make me endure the whole sodding thing then wonder why i'm not pissing myself laughing at it. The other one is someone who thinks i'm interested in what they have been up to at the weekend, really i am not.

 

[Badger]

Nor me. There's 8 other hours in the working day for that shit.

There's always those who are "far too busy" to stop for lunch, which is nearly always bulls**t, they just like to pretend they're important and working so hard for the company.

Horse woman is currently trying to talk to one of the dogs

 

[Badger]

if I try and stay at my desk i have a stream of Morons asking me questions

This winds me up, when someone comes and asks you a question and says "oh, are you on your lunch break?" they are effectively saying "I can CLEARLY see you're on your break but I want you to answer my question anyway".

 

[Notters]

I can never understand people who just sit at their desks for an hour browsing the web at lunch time. Fair enough if it's raining you don't really want to go outside, but I take every opportunity to go for a walk at lunch time, it's good exercise and during the winter it's the only bit of daylight you get to experience. I'd go mad if I just sat at my desk for the entire day, every day.

I was about to get all angry then, but yes, I only do this when it's pissing down/freezing. When the weather's alright I tend to go for a brisk walk on the downs. Otherwise I stay here and try to learn French/Spanish with duolingo.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Where's [MENTION=17261]Iggle Piggle[/MENTION] today, anyway? He must either be on leave, or he's gone Faling Down mental, killed all the ***** in his vicinity, and put his foot through his monitor.

 

[Goring Gull]

This winds me up, when someone comes and asks you a question and says "oh, are you on your lunch break?" they are effectively saying "I can CLEARLY see you're on your break but I want you to answer my question anyway".

Don't even get me started. The best ones are when someone clearly doesn't like an answer you give them they have normally already been told this by someone else and then proceeds to question you! If you don't want the answer or to tell the customer no they can't have x,y,z then tough it's your job go away and deal with it.

 

[British Bulldog]

All I can say is some of you must have some very boring jobs if you spend that much time worrying about what your co-workers are doing.