2012 World's Hardest Creature Competition.......anyone up for it?

[vegster]

Lets get this ridiculus binfest over early this year please, I'm still gutted that The Whelk has never received its true status.

 

[Pbseagull]

Praying Mantis...


These fascinating insects are formidable predators. They have triangular heads poised on a long "neck," or elongated thorax. Mantids can turn their heads 180 degrees to scan their surroundings with two large compound eyes and three other simple eyes located between them.
Typically green or brown and well camouflaged on the plants among which they live, mantis lie in ambush or patiently stalk their quarry. They use their front legs to snare their prey with reflexes so quick that they are difficult to see with the naked eye. Their legs are further equipped with spikes for snaring prey and pinning it in place.

The infamous reproductive process in many praying mantis species, is marked by a post-sexual cannibalism of the male by the hungry female ( also sometimes eat the Male during sex!)...this alone makes them hard, would scare the shit out of me if I were a male Praying Mantis

 

[Woodchip]

Can we have the Sydney Funnel Web spider? Now there's a big bugger that bites multiple times and death is fairly quick.

Human seconded.

Sent by yolk folk

 

[Trufflehound]

Lets get this ridiculus binfest over early this year please, I'm still gutted that The Whelk has never received its true status.

Is that a nomination for the Whelk? If so, I'll second it.

I have encountered many Whelks in the wild and not one ever ran away. They all stood their ground.

As for Honey Badgers, I have seen one, and the little coward was high-tailing it as soon as we appeared.

 

[New Carpet?]

The CASSOWARY has always split opinion in this competition, but as there are few feathered contenders so far, I'm going to nominate this giant mental turkey.

Anyone want to second me on this?

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

in so far:
Orca
Honey Badger
Cape Buffalo
Wolverine
Grizzly Bear
Crocodile
Hippo
human
brazilian wandering spider
immortal jellyfish
hyena
great white shark
bull shark
komodo dragon
cockroach
tasmanian devil
colossal squid
australian box jellyfish
african elephant
rhino
silverback gorilla
black mamba
whelk?!

needs seconding (don't just do it for the hell of it)
jaguar
tiger
giant centipede
mosquito
fangtooth fish
fossa
praying mantis
pitbull
blue-ringed octopus
sydney funnel web spider
cassowary

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

i think the cockroach may be a surprise package this year, i don't think it's been in it before

 

[Aristotle]

in so far:
Orca
Honey Badger
Cape Buffalo
Wolverine
Grizzly Bear
Crocodile
Hippo
human
brazilian wandering spider
immortal jellyfish
hyena
great white shark
bull shark
komodo dragon
cockroach
tasmanian devil
colossal squid
australian box jellyfish
african elephant
rhino
silverback gorilla
black mamba
whelk?!

needs seconding (don't just do it for the hell of it)
jaguar
tiger
giant centipede
mosquito
fangtooth fish
fossa
praying mantis
pitbull
blue-ringed octopus
sydney funnel web spider
cassowary

I'll second these two. Big cats and giant mental turkeys are under represented so far.

 

[zfleas]

The Candiru

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3e/Candiru_Pic1.jpg/250px-Candiru_Pic1.jpg

Looks innocent enough, the kind of fish you wouldn't mind keeping in a tank.

Until..

You learn more about it.

You research deeper and deeper.

The scarier and scarier this 15cm fish becomes.

According to local Brazillians who have had the misfortune of being struck by this creature, the pain is worse 'than walking across a bed of burning embers with a rusty 9 inch nail through each foot'

Its prefered method of attack?

Invade and parasitise the human uretha.

It has even be reported to be able to attack whilst you are not in the water. One kind fellow, Franco Berno Carlos, was relieving himself into the Amazon river, what was considered a safe practice. Then the unimagineable happened. The Candiru swam up his stream and into his uretha.

The poor 23 year old had to have a 2 hour surgical operation to remove the fishy from him, and is still scared of the river today.

http://www.darkbanquet.com/instance_image.php?image=600&cropper=1&x=0&y=0&width=810&height=1184&scale=0.42&time=56573&options=a

Poor Franco.








Couldnt get image attachments to work

 

[MattBackHome]

Not sure. According to that wiki page, you simply need to keep the victim breathing through his state of paralysis. If it was hard, wouldn't it just polish off the victim within seconds or perhaps minutes like a black mamba, rather than sit there like a ponce while your mate keeps you alive with the kiss of life until the ambulance arrives to put you on a machine until you're better again?

Fair enough. It's academic, as the Honey Badger is gonna rip this years competition to pieces anyway.

 

[Commander]

The Candiru

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3e/Candiru_Pic1.jpg/250px-Candiru_Pic1.jpg

Looks innocent enough, the kind of fish you wouldn't mind keeping in a tank.

Until..

You learn more about it.

You research deeper and deeper.

The scarier and scarier this 15cm fish becomes.

According to local Brazillians who have had the misfortune of being struck by this creature, the pain is worse 'than walking across a bed of burning embers with a rusty 9 inch nail through each foot'

Its prefered method of attack?

Invade and parasitise the human uretha.

It has even be reported to be able to attack whilst you are not in the water. One kind fellow, Franco Berno Carlos, was relieving himself into the Amazon river, what was considered a safe practice. Then the unimagineable happened. The Candiru swam up his stream and into his uretha.

The poor 23 year old had to have a 2 hour surgical operation to remove the fishy from him, and is still scared of the river today.

http://www.darkbanquet.com/instance_image.php?image=600&cropper=1&x=0&y=0&width=810&height=1184&scale=0.42&time=56573&options=a

Poor Franco.

I have both swam and urinated in the Amazon River. Was I scared? No.

Would I urinate on the Honey Badgers turf? Not a chance. I don't fancy being CASTRATED.

 

[zfleas]

I have both swam and urinated in the Amazon River. Was I scared? No.

Would I urinate on the Honey Badgers turf? Not a chance. I don't fancy being CASTRATED.

Fair point

 

[MattBackHome]

From the watery depths...

Nominate:
Stonefish - the most poisonous fish in the Sea. Kills stuff.
Moray Eel - Two sets of Jaws.

Can I second the FANGTOOTH FISH

 

[JCL - the new kid in town]

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you ... the mosquito.

Does a mosquito count as its not a venom that kills people but a virus which i assume aren't allowed.

Besides i believe the tsetse fly is worse

 

[Hillian1]

The CASSOWARY has always split opinion in this competition, but as there are few feathered contenders so far, I'm going to nominate this giant mental turkey.

Anyone want to second me on this?

Seconded, mentalcase of a bird.

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

Does a mosquito count as its not a venom that kills people but a virus which i assume aren't allowed.

Besides i believe the tsetse fly is worse

anything that exists is eligible but i can guarantee now that even if the mosquito qualifies it won't get far

yes, it kills loads of people but not on purpose.....it's like a sex addict with aids who doesn't know he has aids......he kills loads of people but doesn't know he's doing it

=not hard

 

[Commander]

Does a mosquito count as its not a venom that kills people but a virus which i assume aren't allowed.

Besides i believe the tsetse fly is worse

I don't really see how the mosquito can be classed as hard. Yes, it kills people, but in a toe-to-toe FIGHT, 99.99% of animals on the planet would kick its arse.

This competition is about SCRAPPERS, nasty bastards who will take on anything, regardless of the odds, and if they are to be beaten then they will go down fighting to the very death.

There aren't many animals that fit this description. The Honey Badger, obviously, is the main one, and by far the best candidate. Other worthy challengers are the Wolverine, the Bull Shark (not the biggest shark but by far the nastiest), the Orca (Great White Shark Killer), the Tasmanian Devil, and the Cockroach.

Tell me more about the Immortal Jellyfish, I've never heard of such a thing.

 

[MattBackHome]

The cockroach will do well this year after proving it's hardness by wading up Fatima Whitbread's NOSE. Not a place for the faint hearted.

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

i'd like to put forward the following

tarantula hawk wasp....EATS TARANTULAS

the GOLDEN EAGLE, which is pretty much the only thing a honey badger is scared of, and they are generally bad-ass as hell

i'd also like to second the JAGUAR which can eat crocodiles on land AND water

 

[vegster]

Is that a nomination for the Whelk? If so, I'll second it.

I have encountered many Whelks in the wild and not one ever ran away. They all stood their ground.

As for Honey Badgers, I have seen one, and the little coward was high-tailing it as soon as we appeared.

Indeed Whelks are rock hard,any creature who feeds by drilling in to its victim and sucking out its innards is pretty vicious in my book. Also, even after cooking they are still pretty hard.