Why I can't go to Cardiff

[On the Left Wing]

Dear all

Thanks so much for all those words and sentiments ... am going to copy this thread and save it and show it to Tan at sometime in the future.

When Tanya and I first set eyes on each other in a Shrewsbury hotel on 13 September last year, I can't begin to explain the emotions that exploded inside both of us. As we walked toward each other across the hotel bar both looking for the nod of acknowledgement as to whether it was me and she was her, neither knew whether to hug each other or shake hands. We ended up holding hands and sitting down to demolish two double vodka and tonics .... that was just nine months ago and the finding out about each other is still just beginning.

She is a fun, intelligent and single-minded girl and I know she will enjoy sitting over a few pints of lager on Sunday watching the play-off final - even if I again have to explain to her that the referee and linesmen dont kick in any particular direction and that you don't get extra points for kicking the ball over the bar.

Hopefully many of you may meet her when she next agrees to brave and Albion match with her dad!

Thanks so much for you support ..... now get on and cheer the Albion to the First Division!

 

[Windmill]

OTLW, just wanted to add my five pennyworth. I too broke up with my wife 13 years ago when my daughter was just 2.

I moved away from Sussex, to Manchester of all places, but after three months of agony I came back - I missed her too much.

Now she's a lively, intelligent, Albion supporting 15 year old. We see each other every week, go on holiday together every Summer, and have a very strong father:daughter relationship.

Cherish every minute mate, not just this weekend, but in the future as well.

 

[saltash seagull]

until i read this i didnt think anything would stop any of us getting 2 cardiff but fair play mate u r definately doing the right think

good luck!!!!

 

[Beach Hut]

This is a fantastic story - I hope you have a really great weekend and perhaps in the not too distant future you can share another BHAFC experience together live.

 

[Shizuoka Dolphin]

Very moving story. All the very best to both of you - you now have your whole life to spend getting to know each other! Have a great day down the pub on Sunday!

 

[Ernest]

Have a great weekend and of course in life there are more important things than a game of football

 

[graz126]

you make the best decision. dont worry you wont be the only one not going. i always thought nothing would stop me from going to this game but since beating swindon it has come to my attention that i cannot afford to go.
at present time im struggling to keep a roof over my familys head. with a bit of tight saving and the money i can gather i will just be able to pay the last 2 months morgage etc. as we are going through the process of changing morgage details we cannot afford to go into arrears. we could lose the house. so the money i would spend going to cardiff will put this situation right for me the wife and 3 kids.
so i know how it feels mate. devestated i wont be there but i hope those going have a great time. and just hope by monday morn we are a division 1 side.
you have made the right decision, it must have been hard for you. i didnt really have the choice to make.

 

[Bobby's Gull]

Nice one OTLW, when I am singing and cheering the lads on at Cardiff I shall be singing for you too. If my dad were like you I'd be a very proud daughter.

 

[Jambo Seagull]

This is one of the most uplifting threads I've read for a long time. There really are more important things in life than football. My brother was celebrating his birthday on Tuesday when he received a call from a close friend of his that another friend had lost his baby daughter to cot death that morning. That news and this thread has put everything into context and gives the lie to Bill Shankly's famous saying.

 

[Row Z Creased Shirt]

Just noticed this thread for the first time, and I agree with Jambo about how uplifting it is us.

OTLW I just hope that those of us in cardiff will have as a good a weekend as you. You have just gone to prove that there is more to sunday than just the result. It would be nice for us to win knowing that you are back in brighton celebrating with your daughter, but whatever the result the weekend will be a celebration for you. Thank you for sharing it with us.

cheers OTLW have a good one!

 

[Hiney]

It also stuffs once and for all the theory that if you don't go to all the games then how can you be a fan.

The Albion is really important to all of us but life is all about priorities and family will always be at the top of that list.

Every one of us that can't go on Sunday is absolutely devastated by that, but we can relax in the knowledge that:

a) We will be there in spirit
b) We have a very good reason for not being there, you only have to read this thread to see that.

OTLW - I salute you for sharing this with us all and I'm sorry I ignored you at Sheffield! Perhaps next year we can have a beer at Leeds? Here's hoping

COME ON YOU SEAGULLS!!!!!

 

[Shegull]

Looks like this is going to be a good weekend for everyone no mater what they are doing.

Best of luck to both you and you daughter. Have a great day

 

[On the Left Wing]

Gosh this is beginning to sound like Kilroy or Trish!

But seriously I guess that although we are all united by our one passion of B&HA and seem we are all faceless pseudonyms on this internet message board, we are also all - each and every one of us - just individual human beings trying to muddle by and make sense of life and trying to do the right thing. As a friend said to me recently: "There's no rule book, we just have to make it up as we go along".

We have all shared part of ourselves here - Graz I really feel for you, Roz thanks, and Simster, the more I read you, the more I think we are on the same political/social wavelength - but to all of you thanks once again - far too many now to list!

I am no Saint (far from it as I have done more than my share of emotional hurt) - it is more than my fault that Tanya's mum and I separated in the first place - but now trying to be a Dad and a better person.

Just copied this from Fathers 4 Justice - think it echoes what Simster wrote:

Children are growing up with multiple step fathers yet being denied access to their own dads. The tragic reality of this policy is that many fathers can see anyone else's kids except their own. All fathers are asking for is the same rights as mum's new partner.

“We can and do frequently fall out of love with our partners. It is a pain that is impossible to explain when we feel betrayed by someone we once loved, and entirely natural that we feel the desire for revenge. Children, however, only fall out with their best friends but never Mummy, Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa.”
EVELYN DOYLE AUGUST 2003

God bless you all and thanks again

 

[jonnyboylennon]

Great stuff mate, you know you've made the right choice. As happy as an Albion victory will make you, your daughter can make you much happier. She's off to Uni as well, sounds brilliant.

Here's to you and your daughter watching the Albion win promotion on Sunday - perfect!

 

[On the Left Wing]

Just one final thought from me on this thread ... and quite an irony .... my mate Joe (a big Celtic fan), who persuaded/bullied me to send a text message to this anonymous number last August, which resulted in Tanya and I being united, is coming over to watch the play-off with us on Sunday and will meet Tan for the first time ................... so that will be two of us telling her that the Ref is not allowed to tackle their striker!

 

[Titanic]

OTLW - as a dad with a daughter (and two sons), who I see every day, I can only wonder what it's like to be in your position.

I can't imagine life without my kids - to have been reunited with your daughter, Tanya, after all these years apart must be fantastic. I know I would put my kids before a footie match, any day! Fortunately I don't have to - we are all going to Cardiff together.

I'm sure you'll find a way of letting her know how passionately you feel about the Albion, without making her feel guilty about depriving you of being there!

She's a very lucky girl to have a dad like you.

Have a great weekend, together.

 

[Brovion]

Sorry, I've been away so I've only just seen this thread. Nic, as you can see everybody is 100% behind you. I love the Albion but I love my family more and I hope you have a brilliant weekend - and many more like it. I couldn't begin to imagine the pain of being parted from my daughter for 19 years.

I wonder if it's too late to get The Large One to make up a 'Boundstone Sixth Form 1974' banner?

 

[Gwylan]

Only just see this thread ...and what a heart-warming one it is too.

Families take precedence, even over the Albion. There is bunch of us meeting up at Cardiff who have been friends since school, over 30 years ago. Although we're scattered all over Britain now, we still meet up for the big games. But one of our number, one of my best friends, won't be there as his wife gave birth to a stillborn daughter a few weeks ago. News like that tends to put football into perspective when we realise what is really important.

Have a great day OTLW. It's wonderful that you're spending time with your daughter and I'm glad that you found this thread so uplifting.

 

[On the Left Wing]

Gwylan, Brovian, Titanic - you are more to join to my list of thanks - partic thanks to Brovian as we also go back over 30 years to Boundstone School (tho unforunately we don't remember each other too well!).

Gwylan: to your friend - I just can't imagine what it must be like to lose a baby like that.

BTW I decided to start a new Thanks thread as quite a few people had PM'd me and a couple emailed me rather than post here, because they had their own personal nightmares. So thanks again.

And lets' see a great victory for the Albion on Sunday!

 

[Gazwag]

I put my daughter first in 1994 when she was born and gave up my season ticket and spent the weekends looking after her as my wife was at work and only this season the three of us have started going to home matches again. I can't imaging what it must have been like for you but our love of all things Albion must always come second to our love of our family.

Have a great day.

Maybe reading these posts will make those posters who feel that those fans sitting at home listening to the radio on a Saturday afternoon are not any lesser fan than those who go week in week out

(Only just read this thread, I thought it was the one in which some were moaning cos they had a holiday booked so couldn't go)