[Film] What is the worst film you have ever seen all the way through?

[ROSM]

I will say Christophe Lambert in Tarzan

Not once did he wrestle an alligator and where was Jai?

He also didn't have the natives laughing at him whilst tied with vine creepers

 

[The Clamp]

Life of Pi - utterly meaningless dross. I'd also add King Ralph but I walked out half way through.

I took my first ever date to King Ralph.

Didn’t get so much as a tit.

 

[W3 BHA]

Has to be Last Tango In Paris. Expected cultured filth with some sort of highbrow meaning to it but it turned out to be very very long and very very very boring !

 

[Guinness Boy]

Life of Pi - utterly meaningless dross. I'd also add King Ralph but I walked out half way through.

Not really an answer to the thread question, but having given up on Life of Pi the novel on page 2 there'd be no chance of me sitting through the film!

 

[nickbrighton]

a long time ago I was a cinema manager, and held press screenings for The Argus, leader, Mid sussex tmes etc. These normally happened early morning before, or late at night after, the cinema was open to the public. I had to sit through some terrible films but the undoubted worst was Thomas The Tank engine film with AlecBaldwin. The problem wasnt that it was a kids film, they can be enjoyable, but that it was just plain awful, full of Americanisms (shell phone -cell phone) which would be meaningless to british kids in 2000, bad acting, plot, everything was terrible. I was in a 1000 seater auditorium, at about midnight with just the film critiic from the Argus watching 85 mins of drivel and it was torture

 

[The Clamp]

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was awful.

I don’t like Kevin Smith films. I sort of pretended to in the 90’s to agree the my mates but I can’t stand them.

There were some chuckles in Mall Rats but I thought Clerks was awful. And I was absolutely the target market in the 90’s.

Kevin Smith himself is even worse than his films. I saw him do a spoken word show and about 45 minutes of it consisted of him telling a story about finally “making out” with the girl of his dreams but he had a cut on his dick.

The whole time they were making out on the couch he was worrying about if it went to sex, should he put his bleeding penis into her.

Just banal drivel. A total dweeb who would be an incel if he wasn’t famous.

That character, Jay, he acts alongside is a grotty, unfunny nitbag. His films aren’t funny. He’s a prick. I can’t stand him or his films.

 

[Insel affe]

This, it was a miserable winter weekend, and we were bored, we had played all the games we had exhausted all other avenues keeping our daughter entertained and we came up with, lets go down the marina and cinema, young one you pick the movie.....

Worst film ever, even by kids standards it was shocking...
Even our daughter thought it made no sense and terrible, so much so, we were second guessing what was next and adding our own lines.
We did laugh so much at our own quips, probably why we look back fondly on such an awful film.

 

[Hotchilidog]

The Sound of Music

Blasphemy!

 

[Stato]

Ferris Bueller Can Fu 's Day Off

To explain to those who have reacted to this, I'd have to admit that FB'sDO is not actually the worst film I've ever seen, it's just the one that immediately came to mind as enraging me. Hated him. Hated the message I took from the film. Would have liked his Principal to catch him and punish him, the smug little turd.

Before anyone explains that I have it wrong, I also hate the internet reimagining of the message, done by people who want to find a way that they can still like a film they loved as a child now that they're old enough to understand what a monster he was. No he wasn't trying to help Cameron. No he wasn't a Tyler Durden. (This is a John Hughes film FFS! Talented light comedy director he may have been, but meta meanings and anti capitalist comment would be, shall we say, untypical of the man's ouvre?).

I was a lefty teenager, seven years in to Thatcher's short termist raid on everything that I considered to be good about my country and to me Bueller was a selfish, out for himself and no-one else representation of everything I hated about the take take take culture of the Reagan and Thatcher era. He was Patrick Bateman as a child. Hated him. Hated the film because he was in it. It wasn't terribly made. I just hated it and still do.

There that should calm things.

P.S. The music was awful too. The Beatles version of 'Twist and Shout' is utter dreck, totally ripped off of the Isley Brothers' cover. (Sorry, I had to. I said something nice about them on a thread a couple of weeks back and have felt queasy ever since).

 

[Normal Rob]

Confessions from the David Galaxy Affair

What was I thinking?

A regular on the Together TVs 10pm 'muff movie' slot

 

[mikeyjh]

The Irishman - Tortuous. I'm not a film buff and always thought that winning an oscar kind of guaranteed it was going to be a great film so I started a plan to watch them all from 1970 onwards (Midnight Cowboy is absolutely my favourite film so I thought I'd start after that). Managed Patton and The French Connection, didn't get on with either of them so gave up. Obv The Godfather is brilliant.

 

[AK74]

Life of Pi - utterly meaningless dross.

Pukka.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

A regular on the Together TVs 10pm 'muff movie' slot

Yes.....I know......

 

[Flounce]

Star Wars!

I normally walk out of films I am not enjoying so don’t stay to the end. I agree on Star Wars (you could be taking the piss of course), I stayed to the end because I took my son who decades on is still a Star Wars fan.

I thought it was a zip zap daft film all about goodies and baddies with ridiculous spacecraft fights and left thinking “f*** me, this is like a really inferior Sci Fi film that is not fit to be even considered in the same league as 2001 A Space Odyssey”

I have never even bothered to start watching any of the other Star Wars franchise crap (to me)

I am shocked at how popular it remains and how my son sold the full set of Star Wars toys he “had to have” as a kid for peanuts when he went to University. I think he got less for the whole lot, and he did have pretty well everything, than he’d get for one piece now!

 

[FamilyGuy]

An Officer and a Gentleman

Back in the day friends of ours arranged a nice dinner at their place and afterwards and to much anticipation they had rented this film from the local video shop (them were the days eh!?), and we all sat down to watch it - it was/is crap.

 

[Seagull58]

Joker: Folie à Deux.
I watched it last Saturday night on a long-haul flight. Complete and utter nonsense. Such a come-down from the previous Joker film.

 

[Flounce]

Oh yes. That and 'The English Patient' are probably the worst two films that I've actually watched all the way through, both at the cinema. Watching at home at least you can turn off if it's shit, I've done that more than once. Recently I just about made it through 'Beetlejuice Beetlejuice', but that was more because I liked the original and I kept waiting for it to get better.

Most boring film I remember watching was the English Patient but I never made it to anywhere near the end. Fabulous scenery though

 

[kevo]

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

Just an awful, awful film. Terrible acting, Kevin Costner's dreadful English accent, and somehow makes what should be an exciting action adventure incredibly boring. But seems to be on TV every Christmas.

 

[Flounce]

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

Just an awful, awful film. Terrible acting, Kevin Costner's dreadful English accent, and somehow makes what should be an exciting action adventure incredibly boring. But seems to be on TV every Christmas.

Did have the Sycamore Gap tree in all it’s glory in it though

 

[Seagull58]

Two Steve Martin "classics"
3 Amigos is the worst but The Man with Two Brains is a close second.