My dogs arse.

[Stat Brother]

Lucky it's a slow news day, or else I wouldn't be able to report this too the masses.

One of my dogs is farting almost on the minute, every minute.
It's toxic here @ Stat Towers.
I'm even too frightened to turn the lights on, for fear of combustion.

 

[Questions]

Lucky it's a slow news day, or else I wouldn't be able to report this too the masses.

One of my dogs is farting almost on the minute, every minute.
It's toxic here @ Stat Towers.
I'm even too frightened to turn the lights on, for fear of combustion.

You,ll need to put the lights on to kick it up the arse and throw the thing out. My mutt got accidentally fed twice the other night and I had to put her in the garden in the end. It made your eyes water.

 

[Stat Brother]

I'm having the odd digestive with a cuppa.
The noise has woken him up.

Luckily he's always been a little ashamed when he trumps, so hopeful now he's awake he'll show a little self discipline.

 

[Box of Frogs]

Our dog lets out the occasional whiff of noxious gas although I think he probably gets wrongly blamed when other members of the family let out a silent one as well.

 

[HastingsSeagull]

Cats are better

 

[mistahclarke]

nothing beats the smell of a Greyhounds

 

[Caveman2012]

Lucky it's a slow news day, or else I wouldn't be able to report this too the masses.

One of my dogs is farting almost on the minute, every minute.
It's toxic here @ Stat Towers.
I'm even too frightened to turn the lights on, for fear of combustion.

I couldn't stop laughing after reading this pmsl

 

[Northstander]

Lucky it's a slow news day, or else I wouldn't be able to report this too the masses.

One of my dogs is farting almost on the minute, every minute.
It's toxic here @ Stat Towers.
I'm even too frightened to turn the lights on, for fear of combustion.

Genuine lmao.

 

[Horton's halftime iceberg]

nothing beats the smell of a Greyhounds

Must be something in the air (no pun intended) our Greyhound was pretty desperate to get out at 5.50am this morning to evacuate last nights tea....

He normally sleeps for King and Country.

 

[34064 Fighter Command]

According to QI, domestic pets 'green haze' is the biggest single contribution to Global warming (through the emission of methane) on the planet, bigger even than farm animals, Chinese pollution and the motor car.

For the sake of the future of the planet, please please don't get a pet.

 

[Stat Brother]

I reckon I've got about 15 years of cycling to do, in order to balance out last nights emissions.

 

[nail-Z]

My dog has digestive issues. Which leads to excessive gas. She's constantly gurgling and letting out the occasional stinker.

I think she managed to trump the first verse of the National Anthem when she went up the stairs last week. Then she sat on the top step, ashamed and confused.

 

[crabface]

The dog down my local can let off some smells, i have actually had to walk out of the pub for some fresh air they are that toxic.

 

[fire&skill]

Have you recently had/been to a BBQ? I find that the surreptitious feeding of charcoal coated semi-raw sausages to a passing canine does strange things to their insides.

 

[GreersElbow]

Currently, our oldest dog, Jack has seemingly passed his horrific continuous farting stage. For a year, he would literally let one off every ten minutes. He'd fart then walk off, they were loud. Oh, and when he jumped on the sofa, he'd rip one off as he got up - as if it some form of boost for him.

 

[Twizzle]

It's the food you are giving these animals. It's obviously messing with their guts otherwise they wouldn't gas so much.

 

[MattBackHome]

My dog once farted in her sleep and managed to wake herself up with a start from the force of it. She was obviously in a state of complete shock at both the noise and the smell as she then proceeded to start barking at her own arse.

 

[Horton's halftime iceberg]

My dog once farted in her sleep and managed to wake herself up with a start from the force of it. She was obviously in a state of complete shock at both the noise and the smell as she then proceeded to start barking at her own arse.

Classic dog IQ

 

[countryman]

nothing beats the smell of a Greyhounds

Try having 3 of them and a lab when they have had a change of dog food. Now that is enough to knock someone out.

 

[Stat Brother]

Said dog 'helped' me in the kitchen, as I was unpodding peas.
Hoovering up all the stray ones that hit the floor.

I think I may be longing for the halcyon days, for yesterday, later.