Joke du Jour

[Brovion]

And what if his name isn't actually 'Ambulance'? If I had an elephant sitting on my head I wouldn't find it particularly helpful if a stranger walked up and just said "Hi there Ambulance!"

 

[Giraffe]

Need clarification on size of ambulance. On the face of it, for it to be sitting on the head of a human man, it must be very small. Possibly even a toy elephant. In which case why call an ambulance. Unless the men with the white coats are coming?

 

[Notters]

I think a crane and an undertaker would be more useful in these circumstances.

 

[GT49er]

Surely one would whip out one's smart phone, take a selfie and hope it goes viral on You Tube?

 

[Winker]

I'd guess it would be a trunk call?

 

[Peter Ward]

I once shot an elephant in my pyjamas.

I dont usually wear them but on that particular night it was quite chilly.

Too right - I'd shoot it if was wearing my pyjamas.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Everyone is assuming it is a real elephant. Before answering the question, I'd need to know if it was an ACTUAL animal, or just a toy. Not that it would make any difference to the person's name, of course. I'd be more interested in an answer to the question 'Why has this man got an elephant on his head?'

 

[Winker]

Everyone is assuming it is a real elephant. Before answering the question, I'd need to know if it was an ACTUAL animal, or just a toy. Not that it would make any difference to the person's name, of course. I'd be more interested in an answer to the question 'Why has this man got an elephant on his head?'

Maybe he was carrying it home from a mammoth clearance sale!

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

I've herd this one before ...

Got s-qwashed last time ...

I'd call him "unlucky"

 

[Petee]

Maybe he was carrying it home from a mammoth clearance sale!

Why would there be an elephant at a mammoth sale?

 

[clarkey]

Surely the insinuation is one of wishing to assist the man. On the assumption that he is beyond assistance, given that the over bearing weight has caused him to be deceased, I think such an action lends itself to offering false promise.

If he was alive I would try to coax the elephant off whilst asking someone else to call the ambulance.

Is it possible to offer false promise to someone already deceased?

 

[Hiney]

I'm familiar with lots of these "What do call a man/woman with........?" The answer is usually the name of a person, like Russel, Annette, Doug etc. I know a few Ans, but I don't know anyone with the surname, Ambulance. This makes no sense whatsoever.

It is possible that the last and first names have been switched. As often happens when people's names are being indexed.

So this chap Lance Anambu is truly unfortunate. It is highly likely he would have been crushed, so the Undertaker would probably be first on my list.

 

[Eeyore]

Is it possible to offer false promise to someone already deceased?

Well, yes. Especially as they can't hold you to it.

 

[Bognor Bystander]

Joseph Merrick ?

 

[SUA Seagull]

Why would there be an elephant at a mammoth sale?

Jumbo discounts were on offer, perhaps?

 

[Buzzer]

On a related note, did you know that Afrika Bambaataa has an identical twin brother called India and the only way you can tell them apart is that his brother has slightly smaller ears.

 

[Questions]

What about a minutes silence before the Derby game for this poor sod crush by the elephant ?

RIP ..... crushed man under elephant.

 

[Questions]

Too right - I'd shoot it if was wearing my pyjamas.

What and ruin a perfectly good pair of Tesco's signature range nightmare ?

 

[Bodian]

Make sure it's a local Ambulance you phone - Trunk Calls cost more.

 

[Jack Straw]

What about a minutes silence before the Derby game for this poor sod crush by the elephant ?

RIP ..... crushed man under elephant.

Where does it say that the man has died? I might as well start reading the Arsgas again if you're going to make up stories on a presumed scenario.