Favourite saying from so call footie experts?

[keaton]

You don't need the words "pro-English club commentary" in that statement.

True, they are awful but awful commentary is so usual nowadays it passes me by.
Them whinging that the foreigners are: going to ground easily, surrounding the referee, waving imaginary cards while ignoring what 'our foreigners' (and Rooney) are doing exactly the same thing just drives me crazy. I watch most games between massive, big money teams as a neutral but this week became a die-hard Bayern supporter after about ten minutes.

 

[king B]

'He should be hitting the target from there'

 

[Kumquat]

"It's a goal!!! And another one!!"
"Foot like a traction engine"
"Go on!! Tw*t it!"

Alan Partridge

 

[Vegas Seagull]

Any phrase that uses the words 'back stick' sends me delirious

 

[Return of the Rev]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VF_uOgyBK1c

 

[perseus]

"If a player is not interfering with play then he shouldn't be on the pitch."

 

[FamilyGuy]

"He's won a penalty"

ffs You can't WIN a penalty.

 

[Return of the Rev]

Hit the back of the net? Surely its the front

 

[Hillian1]

Gives 110% every game.

Grinds my gears that one does.

 

[brakespear]

Anything Alan Green says, especially about players or managers not being 'right' by which he seems to mean they don't play/manage Liverpool, Aresnal, Man United, Man City or Chelsea.

 

[Country Seagull]

Oooh, yes

Also, in a similar vein "But there was contact", as used to justify a player flinging himself to the ground theatrically. That makes it all ok. So long as there was "contact".

See also the flip side, 'he made contact with the ball, so it's not a foul for me'... as if any type of horrible leg-breaking tackle is fair game as long the defender's boot slightly grazed the ball on the way through.

 

[Everest]

ITV-ish "Sorry about going to the adverts. Let me tell you about the goal"

 

[spring hall convert]

"It's Keystone Cops defending."

Haven't we come up with a more contemporary reference?

 

[Clive Walker]

You have to work the keeper.

Actually you have to beat the keeper

 

[Cadiz Seagull]

Goodbye, when said by Andy Townsend

 

[Superphil]

"He's hit the beans on toast"

 

[The Large One]

"He's hit the beans on toast"

Preceded by 'Would you believe your Donald Duck...?'

Others from the Bridesmaid...

"Oooh, 'e's tucked into the onion..."

"OLÉ, OLÉ, OLÉ..."

"Sangria football..."

 

[El Sid]

When I was playing school football my dad would often shout "Go on son, unload him!"

 

[John Bumlick]

On a related note, anyone ("expert" or otherwise) who uses the phrase "stonewall penalty" or "scoring for fun" is a ****.

 

[bobby baxter]

Whenever a penalty appeal is waved on, he pundit, usually the ex pro says , "I've seen them given"