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Hove Seagull

Well-known member
Feb 18, 2008
1,250
Havant
Errr...........read it again, he is talking about Blackpool being scummy.

I know I have mentioned this before but I used to run a nightclub in Blackpool back in the late 80's that had gone into receivership. We were suffering quite big losses and a few thefts so I was 'volunteered' to work there on a Friday and Saturday night and do a cash count and lock the proceeds in the safe.

One night I had just finished locking the safe in the bar office when I heard a noise from elsewhere. I had a baseball bat with me (it was Blackpool, in the 80's after all), and realised the noise was coming from the ladies toilets.

I rushed in shouting with my baseball bat poised, to find one of the bouncers slipping one up the bonus tunnel of a local lady from behind. She screamed, he yelled, and he pulled out from her arse. She had had quite a few to drink, lost control of her sphincter, and directed a flock of loose brown pigeons over his trousers, which were romantically around his ankles at the time.

The bouncer then looked aghast and said "How am I going to get these shit stains off my trousers, my wife will kill me when I get home".

The age of romance is indeed, not dead.

Love the phrase "Bonus Tunnel". Had me chuckiling. Cheers El Pres
 


Feb 24, 2011
2,843
Upper Bevendean
My apologies [MENTION=3462]Springal[/MENTION], went off at the deep end and got the wrong end of the stick big time.



Note to self, read the thread properly, then you may not look as much of a d**k
 


WhingForPresident

.
NSC Patron
Feb 23, 2009
16,349
Marlborough
No disrespect to you guys, but judging on your comments, you make it sound like your a massive club. When you've been playing in league two or one for donkeys years, you've never played in the prem (which we have for such a small club that we are with shit gates etc etc) or infact won anything in your history... I didnt even know who Brighton were a few years back, now 25k fans at every home game? Makes sense.. Loyal fans ofc! Give it 5 years and I wonder whether all the fans will dissappear.

Until you've achieved something, dont give the biggun.. because we have had more success than Brighton.

On that note, I hope we ****ing smash you tomorrow. Seriously hope we do.

:lolol: Didn't even know who Brighton were a few years ago, probably because you were still swimming around in your mother's womb.

Oh, and your "smashing us" is off to a good start :tosser:
 










brightn'ove

cringe
Apr 12, 2011
9,137
London
:lolol: Didn't even know who Brighton were a few years ago, probably because you were still swimming around in your mother's womb.

Oh, and your "smashing us" is off to a good start :tosser:

To be fair, he probably only started supporting blackpool a couple of years ago, so why would he know who brighton were when he was watching Man Utd on the telly?
 






WhingForPresident

.
NSC Patron
Feb 23, 2009
16,349
Marlborough
To be fair, he probably only started supporting blackpool a couple of years ago, so why would he know who brighton were when he was watching Man Utd on the telly?

Ha, I'd say he certainly knows who we are after we metaphorically whipped off his team's pants and shoved a red hot Spanish poker up their jacksie today.
 




















Davemania

Well-known member
Jul 11, 2011
1,752
Uckfield
Hi, well done with your season so far, personally i didn't really expect you to be 4th in the table considering how poor I thought you were at our place but there you go its a strange league, I think were in a false position too imo. Im travelling down to Brighton for first time, what are the closest pubs to the ground? Ive heard its a pig to get in and out of the ground with massive queues etc but the stadium itself is very nice.

Lets hope for a good game, as its a long journey down. We have been playing quite well recently too. A win will make sure we cant go down.:clap2::clap2:

Changed your mind about us deserving 4th per chance?
 




stss30

Registered User
Apr 24, 2008
9,545
No disrespect to you guys, but judging on your comments, you make it sound like your a massive club. When you've been playing in league two or one for donkeys years, you've never played in the prem (which we have for such a small club that we are with shit gates etc etc) or infact won anything in your history... I didnt even know who Brighton were a few years back, now 25k fans at every home game? Makes sense.. Loyal fans ofc! Give it 5 years and I wonder whether all the fans will dissappear.

Until you've achieved something, dont give the biggun.. because we have had more success than Brighton.

On that note, I hope we ****ing smash you tomorrow. Seriously hope we do.

:lolol:
 


Bevendean Hillbilly

New member
Sep 4, 2006
12,805
Nestling in green nowhere
That, my little Northern monkey, is what is known as a pants down spanking.
 


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