Mr Bridger
Sound of the suburbs
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[Misc] Anyone know a good way of destroying 200 pizza boxes?
- Thread starter Swansman
- Start date
swindonseagull
Well-known member
The Andy Naylor Fan Club
Well-known member
I remember watching this, sad really..
Most of my work is in occupied homes, now and again I turn up at a hoarders house, nothing as extreme as Mr Trebus but still pretty shocking to see.
lawros left foot
Glory hunting since 1969
[MENTION=38333]Swansman[/MENTION], this is what you need, they will chew up all your pizza boxes , no problem.
https://youtu.be/zWVw-j8eYSk
Only thing is, you’ll then have to get rid of the mice.
https://youtu.be/zWVw-j8eYSk
Only thing is, you’ll then have to get rid of the mice.
...and 35% reduction times 200 compounded is ...err...gosh...
- Thread starter
- #48
Haha.. I'm pretty slim though (smoker and some days I eat nothing).
About 15 years ago, I lived in a shared house not too dissimilar to this. My girlfriend (now wife, would you believe) was studying at Uni and although I was working for a small web business on the outskirts of Middlesbrough I was only earning about £8,500 a year and so we were pretty skint.
We ended up living in this student house with three other lads who we knew. They were good lads, but did pretty much fúck all all day except smoke weed, eat pot noodles and play a bit of GTA San Andreas. I’d often come back from work to find one of them asleep, stark bollock naked on the settee having failed to muster up enough effort to physically get dressed. On an evening, 2-for-1 student discount pizzas and a few tinnies.
At one point, the mess got so bad it was almost knee deep, mostly with beer cans but a few pizza boxes too (a bit of a problem whenever the odd rogue slice got left in). After a while it just became a bit of a running joke. Can’t see the coffee table no more, how long until the pot plant in the corner disappears?
My missus refused to go anywhere near the living room, she was straight up the stairs every night. To be honest, back then I found it quite harmless and funny myself. That, and after I’d been grafting my arse off all day for very little money I couldn’t be arsed to clean-up something which was mostly somebody else’s mess.
After a while though, it did start to get to me. It’s not, in actual fact, a healthy way to live. One evening, when they were all out, I decided I’d had enough. Now, I’m not a naturally tidy person, and as household chores go I hate tidying up. But that night I spent about five hours dismantling that mess like a man possessed, throwing about sixty black bin bags of rubbish into the back alley, hoovering back and forth until there wasn’t a crumb on the carpet.
Honestly, it was the most un-me thing I’ve ever done but by the time I’d finished the house felt like some magic haven of fúcking zen, tucked away betwixt the crowded streets of the ‘Boro. It was one of the most cathartic experiences of my life. Once finished, I had a quick shower and sat down and chilled with an ice cold beer. It sounds odd, but in that moment I felt ‘at peace’, and I’m not the sort of person who feels that way a lot.
Swansman, I’m telling you, set aside some time tomorrow and nuke the place clean. Do whatever you have to do. I’m sensing a bit of self loathing in your posts, but do it, sort it out good and proper and I promise you it’ll feel like a weight has been lifted.
Much love!
We ended up living in this student house with three other lads who we knew. They were good lads, but did pretty much fúck all all day except smoke weed, eat pot noodles and play a bit of GTA San Andreas. I’d often come back from work to find one of them asleep, stark bollock naked on the settee having failed to muster up enough effort to physically get dressed. On an evening, 2-for-1 student discount pizzas and a few tinnies.
At one point, the mess got so bad it was almost knee deep, mostly with beer cans but a few pizza boxes too (a bit of a problem whenever the odd rogue slice got left in). After a while it just became a bit of a running joke. Can’t see the coffee table no more, how long until the pot plant in the corner disappears?
My missus refused to go anywhere near the living room, she was straight up the stairs every night. To be honest, back then I found it quite harmless and funny myself. That, and after I’d been grafting my arse off all day for very little money I couldn’t be arsed to clean-up something which was mostly somebody else’s mess.
After a while though, it did start to get to me. It’s not, in actual fact, a healthy way to live. One evening, when they were all out, I decided I’d had enough. Now, I’m not a naturally tidy person, and as household chores go I hate tidying up. But that night I spent about five hours dismantling that mess like a man possessed, throwing about sixty black bin bags of rubbish into the back alley, hoovering back and forth until there wasn’t a crumb on the carpet.
Honestly, it was the most un-me thing I’ve ever done but by the time I’d finished the house felt like some magic haven of fúcking zen, tucked away betwixt the crowded streets of the ‘Boro. It was one of the most cathartic experiences of my life. Once finished, I had a quick shower and sat down and chilled with an ice cold beer. It sounds odd, but in that moment I felt ‘at peace’, and I’m not the sort of person who feels that way a lot.
Swansman, I’m telling you, set aside some time tomorrow and nuke the place clean. Do whatever you have to do. I’m sensing a bit of self loathing in your posts, but do it, sort it out good and proper and I promise you it’ll feel like a weight has been lifted.
Much love!
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The Andy Naylor Fan Club
Well-known member
Oh my days. I remember watching that, a very proud man and a great character. Aired 21 years ago. Feck me I'm losing track of time
- Thread starter
- #52
Watched the whole thing (well, the Trebus parts)... that poor lovely man. I love him and fear him.
Part of my decision to finally get on with the cleaning is because someone broke into (well... I didnt lock because **** knows where my key was - found it today though) my apartment the other day when I was at the store and took my TV. Kid in the stairwell said it was four Somalians who did it but I'm sure its the kid and his criminal brothers, but **** can I do... I dont live here legally. Its not my apartment.
While sitting in my couch, rolling my last weed to cope with it, I had mainly two feelings: very happy they didnt take the probably very expensive sound system in here, but also the odd feeling that I was embarrased that the thieves had seen the state of my apartment. Both of these feelings were more intense than any anger or whatever.
Sort of decided to treat it as a wake-up call, which I've had quite a few of over the years, hopefully I'll remain wake this time around.
- Thread starter
- #54
Nice post. I relate to a lot of things.
Yup, done a lot of cleaning today and it already feels good (I can walk on my floor instead of almost climbing around). Going to keep it up tomorrow - wont be able to afford any weed for the forseeable future, which is great as it's been one of the things stopping me like 500 times to finally get my shit together and solve it.
The Andy Naylor Fan Club
Well-known member
Sounds like you could use a bit of reverse psychology here. Spread it around that there is a stash of cash left in your pizza boxes. Accidentally leave the front door ajar, pop out for 15 minutes and hopefully instead of hanging around looking in the boxes they'll just take them away to look for your non existent loot elsewhere!
- Thread starter
- #56
Sounds like you could use a bit of reverse psychology here. Spread it around that there is a stash of cash left in your pizza boxes. Accidentally leave the front door ajar, pop out for 15 minutes and hopefully instead of hanging around looking in the boxes they'll just take them away to look for your non existent loot elsewhere!
Yeah I actually imagine there's a joint somewhere in here...
As for cash I almost expect to find some.
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Palacefinder General
Well-known member
- Apr 5, 2019
- 2,594
Swansman's an absolute gift from the Norse gods and one of our own (until GP gets the Man City gig at least). Legendary stuff. 
Pogue Mahone
Well-known member
- Apr 30, 2011
- 10,750
About 165 days a year?
Juan Albion
Chicken Sniffer 3rd Class
Have you considered getting a goat? They eat just about anything and once it has chewed its way through the 200 boxes, you can eat it and eventually you will, in effect, be flushing the boxes down the toilet.
Good on you, and best of luck to you mate.
Re: weed, I’m really wary of coming across as preachy because a) I smoked a lot of it myself when I was younger and b) because I’m the last person to lecture people about vices (I drink waay too much), but try and keep it out of your life if you can.
I’ve seen it send some really brilliant and talented people way off track. To a degree, I think people can function professionally and in the wider world with unhealthy booze habits, but less so with weed. The lethargy, the clouding of thought, the paranoia that tends to come with it seems to be far more consuming. It doesn’t wear off like a hangover does by mid-morning.
Look after yourself. Now is a brilliant opportunity to press the reset button.