An Alcoholic's dilemma

[On the Left Wing]

This is not a patch on Digweed's first date, but I have a real dilemma ....

This Friday night is one of my best mate's (Colin) surprise 40th birthday party. I told his wife I would be there a few weeks ago (before I came out!). It is being held in a club in Sunderland where booze will be flowing freely (and free!) all night.

However, Friday night is also my second AA meeting and I really need to attend (also want to!).

So I need to work out what I should do ....

1. Let Mrs OTLW go alone and send my apologies. I attend AA.

2. Attend AA (which finishes around 10pm) then drive to the party and bank on willpower and Mrs OTLW and the fact I am driving to stay dry.

3. Attend the party cos Colin really is a good friend (even though he doesn't know I am an alcoholic). Again hope willpower and wife see me through.

I am hedging on option 1 .... also I have to be up early on Saturday to travel to Watford!

Advice?

 

[WATFORD O]

No 2.

 

[Man of Harveys]

4. Get shitheaded drunk on cider at Colin's party and sleep in a hedge afterwards

 

[captainmorganrum]

Option 2 sounds good to me - you can use the 'excuse' of being the driver to turn down any offers of drink from Colin (he's bound to offer!).
I'm sure that you will be commited enough to stay off the booze on Friday - once you've got that difficult hurdle out of the way you will know you are on the right track.


Whatever you decide - good luck for the future.

 

[ditchy]

send mrs otlw with apologies

 

[Marc]

I told his wife I would be there a few weeks ago (before I came out!).

have I taken that in completley the wrong context? you're gay now? if so well done for being so brave as to admit it, good on ya mate (probably means you came out as an Alcoholic though, stupid me)



edit meant:

Option 2 seems alright to me, your friend will understand your need to attend and turn up later, if he is a good friend as you say

 

[aftershavedave]

number 2 is the really obvious choice.

not to attend aa is inviting trouble (as you're clearly in need of the support as you have said) but to disrupt your social life that much is also not on. turning up late and staying sober should not be that tough if you're ready for a challenge. and having the car is a fantastic excuse not to drink....

 

[zefarelly]

No2 if you feel good and strong enough after the AA meeting . .. . .. if not, No1 and go home for a coffee and a pat on the back for sticking to it

a true freind will know, and a true freind will tell !

 

[34064 Fighter Command]

This clearly requires a bit of thought.

If I were you I'd mull it over whilst downing a bottle or two of ..... your ..... favourite ..... tipp ......

OK maybe just an orange squash then.

 

[Lammy]

3)
b)Attend the party an explain to your 'good' friend that you have a problem and are doing your best to overcome it. If he is a good friend he will be a) delighted to see you b) Supportive.


It's up to you though. Are you ready for parties and staying sober yet? I know when I was giving up ciggies I avoided them like the plague for a while. These days I don't even get the urge. Obviously the two additions are totally different though.

Only YOU know how you feel.

 

[On the Left Wing]

Re: Re: An Alcoholic's dilemma

have I taken that in completley the wrong context? you're gay now? if so well done for being so brave as to admit it, good on ya mate (probably means you came out as an Alcoholic though, stupid me)



edit meant:

Option 2 seems alright to me, your friend will understand your need to attend and turn up later, if he is a good friend as you say

Okay Crabbers you have finally forced me to admit it ...... I want to take you and Safeway home with me ....

:safeway2:

 

[On the Left Wing]

No2 if you feel good and strong enough after the AA meeting . .. . .. if not, No1 and go home for a coffee and a pat on the back for sticking to it

a true freind will know, and a true freind will tell !

Thanks Zef ... that's a good idea ... Mrs OTLW can hold the fort either way and a simple mobile call can alert her .... more mulling I think!

 

[Marc]

marevlous, I'll bring the eerr..Lemonade!


seriosuly as I said and other people have stated, go to the AA and then the Party if only for 10mins to collect the Wife. If your mate is as good/close to you as you say he will understand and stand by you all the way to dry dock!

 

[Titanic]

Personally, I'd go for Option 3.

I recently had my 40th birthday party... it was fantastic, we had loads of friends and family there, great food, loads of drink (free bar), a great live band, dancing etc...

I drank Diet Coke all evening, and had one of the best nights of my life - and I can remember it all.

You've had the courage and strength to recognise your problem and to talk about it in 'public' - if you think you can do it, I would definitely go for this option - and driving, and asking for your wife and friends support.

You will be so pleased with yourself if it works. If not, then AA will be there ext week for the confessions, guidance and support you need to get through this.

But go for it - it's a real 'Olympic moment' in my book - be prepared for it to be difficult, but when you succeed, it will be a fantastic boost to your self-esteem and in your struggle to beat this.

Good luck mate.

 

[On the Left Wing]

I dreamt last night of having a secret bottle of red wine. It was only a small bottle but I could even taste it! I was staying in a small stone cottage on Blackpool seafront (don't ask) and there was aslo small bottle of white wine on the sideboard which I was reaching for before I woke up.

Quite frightening as in 48 years I have never dreamed about drinking before .... usually it's the common or garden sex, attempted sex or running away naked sort of dream!

 

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

I would go for number 1 - it'd take a hell of a lot of willpower to say no - especially if they dont know your problems.

 

[zefarelly]

who ever had a dream about sex

I on the other hand have bizarre Blackpool vineyard type dreams on a regular basis

the NSC help centre just goes from styrength to strength

keep up the good effort OTLW

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

No 2. Then at least you can ask AA what THEY would do.

 

[Seagull's Return]

Whatever else, I don't think you should miss your AA meeting: it's only your second time and, as you say, you need and want to attend; going to the party or not is a secondary consideration, really. I reckon Tom Hark's right, you can ask them what they think at the meeting.

 

[Sorrel]

I think option 1 is the safest. But if you do option 2, and then don't have a drink you'll feel really good about it the next day.