[Help] A Wee Issue...

[hart's shirt]

Once had a cat that had eaten the string from a Sunday joint and ran round the kitchen with that hanging out it's arse.

Too much fiber in the diet.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

[MENTION=1200]Harry Wilson's tackle[/MENTION] is your go to for all things asparagus

Roast beetroot not only turns the wee red, it turns the poo red. When I stumbled across this, idly glancing down the pan one fine morning, I swear I nearly shat myself.

There was a great comedy sketch in two parts on a show some years ago. Couple in bed, her going 'I really don't want to but I will if it makes you happy'. Sketch resumes after a bit. He's saying 'have you been eating asparagus?'

 

[WATFORD zero]

What about Johnny Eck, lived to the age of 80 with no bladder, genitalia or arse. How is that even possible? To quote his Wikipedia page “Apart from having no lower half, he was otherwise completely healthy”

And not a lot of people know that he is the Eck referred to in the term "Flippin Eck".

If that's true. it was worth being on NSC tonight for that alone

 

[Barham's tash]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stool, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness might be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

Remember the colour wheel. Sounds like she mixed in some yellow.

Bile + blue cake = yellow poo

Beetroot poos are the worst especially if you had some as part of a meal you don’t remember after too much wine the night before.

Talk about chateau neuf du pape Rodders...

 

[atfc village]

I can eat a bowl of Sugar Puffs, then around three hours later my pee smells exactly like Sugar Puffs. I have zero idea why...

I no longer eat Sugar Puffs.

Sign of diabetes ,get that smell if i sometimes over do the sugar intake .

 

[Swansman]

Asparagus really sounds like some dangerous infection or disease. "I suffer from asparagus, they doctors say it is fatal." I recommend you to adopt the Swedish word for it, "sparris", to increase the appeal of this fine vegetable.

 

[Westdene Seagull]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stool, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness might be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

I've never got over having to stick my finger up my youngest son's bum when he was a baby to pull out a bright white sausage sized poo - why was it bright white ?

** the normal poo followed seconds later ! **

 

[jonnyrovers]

Morrocco Road, Shoreham-by-sea?

Old Shoreham Road, Marrakesh.

 

[Westdene Seagull]

Asparagus really sounds like some dangerous infection or disease. "I suffer from asparagus, they doctors say it is fatal." I recommend you to adopt the Swedish word for it, "sparris", to increase the appeal of this fine vegetable.

An Argentinian friend pronounces it as 'es-par-roo-gus' which I always find funny but it also sounds far better.

 

[jonnyrovers]

I've never got over having to stick my finger up my youngest son's bum when he was a baby to pull out a bright white sausage sized poo - why was it bright white ?

** the normal poo followed seconds later ! **

How old is your son now? is he ok? do you manage eye contact??

 

[Westdene Seagull]

Ha ha - he's 14 and doesn't remember a thing .... unlike me !

 

[thedonkeycentrehalf]

Roast beetroot not only turns the wee red, it turns the poo red. When I stumbled across this, idly glancing down the pan one fine morning, I swear I nearly shat myself.

I had this a few years ago with a beetroot and horseradish soup. Had a poo the following morning while not fully awake, saw what was in the pan and paniced. Took me a few minutes before I remembered the soup and was seriously worried for my health.

 

[LamieRobertson]

[MENTION=1200]Harry Wilson's tackle[/MENTION] is your go to for all things asparagus

U not growing it then?

 

[AmexRuislip]

U not growing it then?

Yes, its out of season

 

[Palacefinder General]

What about Johnny Eck, lived to the age of 80 with no bladder, genitalia or arse. How is that even possible? To quote his Wikipedia page “Apart from having no lower half, he was otherwise completely healthy”

And not a lot of people know that he is the Eck referred to in the term "Flippin Eck".

Fantastic bit of trivia!

 

[golddene]

Once had a cat that had eaten the string from a Sunday joint and ran round the kitchen with that hanging out it's arse. No real stories about the kids that I can remember

Once had a German shepherd, taking him out for a walk one night and he had a pooh, looking at him while I cleaned his mess up and noticed a J cloth hanging out his arse.

 

[darkwolf666]

In my experience, after many years of trying to raise kids and pets, it is the major difference. The pets output is slightly less predictable

*edit* And, I forgot, pets are quieter and cost less

And you can hit your kids with a rolled up newspaper and rub their noses in it if they pooh on the carpet - or something like that!