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Listen you slaaaags. Whilst you head wobblers were all getting your pictures taken at the United megastore last Saturday with one of the OB from Sussex who is a facking United fan (orright PC Daz BTW), us old lags were keeping up the reputation of the Albion by getting facking stuck into those...

Listen up you slaaaags. There’s been too much whining, wimpering and defeatism from you PUSSIES on here, it’s time for the HPAC to remind you what the Albion v Palace is all abaht. When we played Palace at Selhurst last time, a lot of the old lags came out of retirement. Scratchcard, Big Vern...

Listen you slaggggs. Time to co-ordinate, things are not going the way we want them to. We need to choose a match coming up soon, and at a particular time, say the 15th minute (remember York in 1996!), everyone stand up and turn their backs to the pitch for 60 seconds, then get back to...

Listen you slaagggs. We took a pasting on the pitch, and I've had longer shits than the time Lewis Dunk spent on the pitch today, but HACC have not let you dahn. We had arranged a meet at one of Palace's top boozers, The Slag's Head, and came up with a result. Can't say too much, suspect the...

Listen you slaaaaaags, Saturday is important innit, and I and the rest of the HACC have put some extra antifreeze in the Austin Allegro, and we're out of retirement and looking meaner than Arnie, Sly, Dolph and Jason Stafam in The Expendables. We're the Hove Actually Cavemen Crew Palace, and we...

Have had a few texts from Scratchcard, Peacehaven Pete, Uncle Morty, Armadillo and Big Vern. The Brighton Education Committee have reformed, that is all.

Got to worth turning up to! :clap2:

Tiger:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:I will leave an envelope at the front desk under ms daniels. Your room will be 305. Get settled and let me know when you are ready to see me. I will be i Tiger:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:n room 201. You can come down the stair well next to your room. Make sure...

Get it here http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00rr61h/Late_Kick_Off_London_and_the_South_East_2010_Episode_10/

http://www.southparkstudios.co.uk/

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Flushed with anticipation and ready to emerge from another long, cold winter, thousands of Brighton Residents participated last week in the annual tradition of trimming their pubic regions in time for Valentine's Day. A ritual as old as time itself, this year's pubis-shearing is expected to be...

We have won only 2 games out of 17 (and lost 8) when that has been the case this season, putting us BOTTOM of the table in that regard.

Looking at the side that finished yesterday, the goals scored by them this season for the Albion in the league is Whing 0 Elphick 0 Borrowdale 0 Carole 0 Bangura 0 Fraser 0 Owusu 1 Virgo 2 Cox 3 :down:

Can't be any worse than the other tedious polls

Albion players held a team press conference Monday to express their shock, confusion, and disgust at discovering midfield midget Dean Cox masturbating vigorously in the darkness of the team's tape room while viewing recordings of his recent stellar performance against Yeovil. "We were walking...

......have already sold 18,000 season tickets for next year, despite not knowing what division they will be in? £388 for new STH and £366 if paid by end of Feb, rising to £398 and £410 if paid for by mid April. We are delusional if we think we are even a medium size club.

A mother has been jailed for eight years for inflicting a "horrific" series of injuries on her two-month-old son, who died hours later. Claire Biggs, 27, from Newham, east London, repeatedly crushed her son Rhys, fracturing 17 of his ribs. Biggs was found guilty of assault and her partner Paul...

Dave Kitson, Reading to Stoke for £5.5million, appearances 18, goals 0. Now back at Reading on loan as 'couldn't settle in the shithole that is Stoke'