yesterday ai found out Ive got an older brother.

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Raleigh Chopper

New member
Sep 1, 2011
12,054
Plymouth
A good friend of mine overheard his mum and dad ( who thought their son was out) talking to friends in their lounge that he was adopted, he did not know, he was 15 at the time, ouch.
 


Feb 23, 2009
23,195
Brighton factually.....
My dad came home from work at Shoreham Yacht club were he worked the bar as a second job, to find the fence gone, he opend the door and found everything had been cleared out apart from his clothes and me in a cot. I got popped into a kiddies home for a while and he got re married I lived with them and he went onto have two children boys who were half brothers,until we got introduced to an older half sister who he failed to tell my step mum about as he was a scallywag when he was a nipper. She had tracked him down, we all get on ok, this made me wonder about my mother and I tracked her down about 20 years ago. The Salvation Army helped me and when I eventually met her my first question that had burned in me for years was "why did you not try and track me down or fight for custody etc" her immidiate reply was well your dad blah blah and you could have been in prison"....... Wow hold your horses right there, get the feck out of my house and don't ever contact me. I don't regret it, but I know I am missing out on three extra half brothers and sisters, and the truth is I don't care. Bitter maybe
 




Phat Baz 68

Get a ****ing life mate !
Apr 16, 2011
5,023
I have a half brother I believe is called Christopher who is by now about 26/27 have never met him, lives in the West Midlands somewhere !!???
 




Justice

Dangerous Idiot
Jun 21, 2012
19,013
Born In Shoreham
I tracked down my real old man to a grotty house near Hove station a few years back, 26 years later and the prick still didn't want to know.
 




Gazwag

5 millionth post poster
Mar 4, 2004
30,219
Bexhill-on-Sea
About 15 years ago my Dad got a telephone call from his brother he never knew he had for almost 60 years. Neither knew about each other and it only came up when his brothers wife was doing the family tree. The great on really well and are alike in many ways.
 


topbanana36

Well-known member
Dec 29, 2007
1,755
New Zealand
Turns out my dad had a child before he married my mum. I got a twitter message yesterday from him and spoke to him last night. It's bloody wierd.
Anybody else had a similar experience and if so what happened, how did it work out ?

My cousin had almost exactly the same experience, worked out fantastically for my cousin and I have a new cousin to boot.
 






Screaming J

He'll put a spell on you
Jul 13, 2004
2,370
Exiled from the South Country
We discovered about 4 years ago that my Dad's mother (he was born in 1924) had had a daughter in 1917 but that the father had died in the war and she had later married my Grandad. This lady - my Dad's 1/2 sister - was still alive and knew a bit about my Dad and the family because - unknown to anybody - my Granny's sister had kept in touch with the family who had adopted my Granny's daughter.

My dad and his 1/2 sister met and we had a big family do a couple of years ago and it was a great success. She was spitting image of my Gran - there could be no doubt. Sadly they are both dead now but it was a great experience that they were able to meet and exchange reminiscences while they had the chance.
 


beakyburn

New member
Aug 15, 2012
208
I used to be ashamed at being adopted for 40 years but now I embrace it as it is what makes me and I love my parents to death. I am curious of who my mum and dad are and if I have any siblings but my loyalty to my parents prevents me for finding this out. Still wonder about my Mum almost everyday.

My mum and dad were both 16 when I was born. As it was 1951 it was seen as a complete no no. The day I was born I was taken away without my mother even being allowed to hold me. At 6 months I was adopted by a couple who I always and still do even though they are no longer with us call mum and dad. They told me when I was 9 years old that I was adopted. They also knew that as adoptive parents that one day I would want to know about my real parents. so it was them who brought the subject up first. As my mother had a fairly uncommon surname I for some strange reason brought the Hampshire phone book and found just 2 names. Well that's a start so with a big intake of breath I phoned the 1st. The mans voice at the other end just said he had waited over 40 years for this call after I had explained who I was. I was invited down to his place a month later with my wife and son as my mother was staying with him as she was now widowed. That was the 1st and only time I have met her though we always sent Birthday And Xmas cards. Then a few years ago they stopped. Then 3 months ago a letter came and it was from mums eldest son. She was now living with him as she was suffering from dementia. He is the oldest of 3 boys and has always wanted to make contact. So hopefully down to the west country soon to meet 3 half brothers for the first time. On the other side. Tracked my father down 25 years ago and he also went on to have 3 sons but is not interested that much with keeping in touch. So here I am now at 62 being the eldest of seven boys shared between 2 people who slipped up all those years ago. To anybody who is adopted I recommend you try to find out who your real parents are. Don't leave it until it is to late. It bugged me for many many years and I am so glad I have found my birth family.
 


BN9 BHA

DOCKERS
NSC Patron
Jul 14, 2013
21,706
Newhaven
My mum and dad were both 16 when I was born. As it was 1951 it was seen as a complete no no. The day I was born I was taken away without my mother even being allowed to hold me. At 6 months I was adopted by a couple who I always and still do even though they are no longer with us call mum and dad. They told me when I was 9 years old that I was adopted. They also knew that as adoptive parents that one day I would want to know about my real parents. so it was them who brought the subject up first. As my mother had a fairly uncommon surname I for some strange reason brought the Hampshire phone book and found just 2 names. Well that's a start so with a big intake of breath I phoned the 1st. The mans voice at the other end just said he had waited over 40 years for this call after I had explained who I was. I was invited down to his place a month later with my wife and son as my mother was staying with him as she was now widowed. That was the 1st and only time I have met her though we always sent Birthday And Xmas cards. Then a few years ago they stopped. Then 3 months ago a letter came and it was from mums eldest son. She was now living with him as she was suffering from dementia. He is the oldest of 3 boys and has always wanted to make contact. So hopefully down to the west country soon to meet 3 half brothers for the first time. On the other side. Tracked my father down 25 years ago and he also went on to have 3 sons but is not interested that much with keeping in touch. So here I am now at 62 being the eldest of seven boys shared between 2 people who slipped up all those years ago. To anybody who is adopted I recommend you try to find out who your real parents are. Don't leave it until it is to late. It bugged me for many many years and I am so glad I have found my birth family.

:thumbsup:
Good post, interesting story.
 




Lindfield by the Pond

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2009
1,890
Lindfield (near the pond)
Just reading this thread. Some amazing stories - I just can't imagine the questions in individuals minds. Who am I, where do I come from etc? Those that live with these questions - nothing I can say other than admiration. Makes me think I am so lucky - although my brother is so NSK, it's unbelievable!
 




El Presidente

The ONLY Gay in Brighton
Helpful Moderator
Jul 5, 2003
39,722
Pattknull med Haksprut
Some really touching stuff here, very moving.

As a father who has not seen his daughter for 29 months (self inflicted, you have to bear the consequences of decisions you make in life)I know what' it's like from the other side. Parents don't stop thinking about their kids, they sometimes are too scared to make the move because the fear of rejection is more painful than the possibility of reconciliation, of which I have none.
 


Austrian Gull

Well-known member
Feb 5, 2009
2,470
Linz, Austria
My mum and dad were both 16 when I was born. As it was 1951 it was seen as a complete no no. The day I was born I was taken away without my mother even being allowed to hold me. At 6 months I was adopted by a couple who I always and still do even though they are no longer with us call mum and dad. They told me when I was 9 years old that I was adopted. They also knew that as adoptive parents that one day I would want to know about my real parents. so it was them who brought the subject up first. As my mother had a fairly uncommon surname I for some strange reason brought the Hampshire phone book and found just 2 names. Well that's a start so with a big intake of breath I phoned the 1st. The mans voice at the other end just said he had waited over 40 years for this call after I had explained who I was. I was invited down to his place a month later with my wife and son as my mother was staying with him as she was now widowed. That was the 1st and only time I have met her though we always sent Birthday And Xmas cards. Then a few years ago they stopped. Then 3 months ago a letter came and it was from mums eldest son. She was now living with him as she was suffering from dementia. He is the oldest of 3 boys and has always wanted to make contact. So hopefully down to the west country soon to meet 3 half brothers for the first time. On the other side. Tracked my father down 25 years ago and he also went on to have 3 sons but is not interested that much with keeping in touch. So here I am now at 62 being the eldest of seven boys shared between 2 people who slipped up all those years ago. To anybody who is adopted I recommend you try to find out who your real parents are. Don't leave it until it is to late. It bugged me for many many years and I am so glad I have found my birth family.

Thanks for posting your story. I am also adopted but have never really felt a strong desire to meet my natural parents - my mum died last year and my dad has dementia (he no longer has any idea who any of his family are) so it's kind of now or never if I want to find out about my past.

I guess it was out of loyalty to them that I never pushed the issue - they gave me the best upbringing possible - but I also don't want to intrude in other people's lives. A friend of my sister's contacted her birth parents and her mother's husband had no idea about what had happened and took it very badly.

Good luck to you for the future:smile:
 




Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,290
Surrey
My mum and dad were both 16 when I was born. As it was 1951 it was seen as a complete no no. The day I was born I was taken away without my mother even being allowed to hold me. At 6 months I was adopted by a couple who I always and still do even though they are no longer with us call mum and dad. They told me when I was 9 years old that I was adopted. They also knew that as adoptive parents that one day I would want to know about my real parents. so it was them who brought the subject up first. As my mother had a fairly uncommon surname I for some strange reason brought the Hampshire phone book and found just 2 names. Well that's a start so with a big intake of breath I phoned the 1st. The mans voice at the other end just said he had waited over 40 years for this call after I had explained who I was. I was invited down to his place a month later with my wife and son as my mother was staying with him as she was now widowed. That was the 1st and only time I have met her though we always sent Birthday And Xmas cards. Then a few years ago they stopped. Then 3 months ago a letter came and it was from mums eldest son. She was now living with him as she was suffering from dementia. He is the oldest of 3 boys and has always wanted to make contact. So hopefully down to the west country soon to meet 3 half brothers for the first time. On the other side. Tracked my father down 25 years ago and he also went on to have 3 sons but is not interested that much with keeping in touch. So here I am now at 62 being the eldest of seven boys shared between 2 people who slipped up all those years ago. To anybody who is adopted I recommend you try to find out who your real parents are. Don't leave it until it is to late. It bugged me for many many years and I am so glad I have found my birth family.

The sort of post that makes NSC worth reading. :thumbsup:
 


Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,290
Surrey
Some really touching stuff here, very moving.

As a father who has not seen his daughter for 29 months (self inflicted, you have to bear the consequences of decisions you make in life)I know what' it's like from the other side. Parents don't stop thinking about their kids, they sometimes are too scared to make the move because the fear of rejection is more painful than the possibility of reconciliation, of which I have none.

I don't wish to delve into your private life on a public forum, but this is very sad. Are you certain there is no chance of reconciliation? Even if your kids are old enough to make their own decisions, they might well re-evaluate if you continue to show interest in them. Things seem so black and white when you're young without ties, but as you grow older I think you realise they rarely are.
 


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