[Humour] Joke du jour

[smillie's garden]

Westerham is probably full of Palace, so the drink purchaser may have been jumping to conclusions whether he misheard the music genre or not?

 

[Sid and the Sharknados]

I had a pint of Guinness in Dublin and paid in Euros!

I'd have guessed* there are probably plenty of places in Malta you could order a pint and pay in Euros.

*I have been relatively recently, but have no recollection of actually going into any pubs or bars.

 

[Matt Richards]

It is extremely unlikely that the price of live entertainment would be incorporated into the price of drinks to consumers. Were this to be the case it would mean those who consumed multiple pints would be paying time and time again for the live band. It is much more likely that the price would be charged as an entry fee into the pub or would not be passed on to the consumer at all, with the pub hoping to reap the cost of the live band through increased revenue generated by both a higher than average turnout and those punters staying longer than would ordinarily be the case.

For these reasons I find this a very unlikely set of circumstances.

 

[Bry Nylon]

I'd have guessed* there are probably plenty of places in Malta you could order a pint and pay in Euros.

That would make sense. After all, if the bar is in Malta and they are booking live entertainment from Kent that would possibly explain why the drinks are being priced at a significant premium, assuming they are offering to cover any reasonable travel expenses incurred?

 

[el punal]

I had a pint of Guinness in Dublin and paid in Euros!

I did say mainland Europe! Salut!

 

[el punal]

I think you should tell the publicans in Limerick that. I was buying pints and paying in Euros and no-one mentioned dobles or grandes

Again - I did say mainland Europe, but I get your drift to be sure!

 

[Official Old Man]

Just thought I'd shove this here, well why not.
Browsing through Christmas Markets I came upon this in Cologne.
I wonder if they know what it says?

Original page

Der Super Weihnachtsmarkt | KölnTourismus

Upcycling, handmade, local und fair – am zweiten Adventswochenende ist wieder nachhaltiges Weihnachtsshopping in der Kölner Südstadt angesagt. Jetzt informier...

www.koelntourismus.de

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

So the deaf bloke asks repeatedly which genre of music it is. Then believes he had heard the barman say it's a **** from Westerham. If this is the case, and he is interested in the genre, why did he not then ask 'okay, it's a **** from Westerham, but which genre of music is he playing?"

This story doesn’t add up.

 

[jcdenton08]

Just thought I'd shove this here, well why not.
Browsing through Christmas Markets I came upon this in Cologne.
I wonder if they know what it says?
View attachment 187579

Original page

Der Super Weihnachtsmarkt | KölnTourismus

Upcycling, handmade, local und fair – am zweiten Adventswochenende ist wieder nachhaltiges Weihnachtsshopping in der Kölner Südstadt angesagt. Jetzt informier...

www.koelntourismus.de

Would you like to making f*** BERZERKER

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

Just thought I'd shove this here, well why not.
Browsing through Christmas Markets I came upon this in Cologne.
I wonder if they know what it says?
View attachment 187579

Original page

Der Super Weihnachtsmarkt | KölnTourismus

Upcycling, handmade, local und fair – am zweiten Adventswochenende ist wieder nachhaltiges Weihnachtsshopping in der Kölner Südstadt angesagt. Jetzt informier...

www.koelntourismus.de

I would hazard a guess that they do know full well what it says!

 

[Brovion]

I do hope @Lurker is enjoying this thread. He mentioned on the 'How to make NSC better' thread how much he enjoyed the intelligent way the 'Joke Du Jour' threads deconstruct and analyse the joke. In fact I'm sure he's got a big smile breaming on his face.

Sorry Lurker!

 

[Westdene Seagull]

Why are you ordering pints and yet paying in euros? This situation is obviously taking place on mainland Europe in which case you would be ordering a beer according the following sizes, for example, cana or doble or stein or grande or piccolo and so forth.

Earlier this week I went to my local bar here in France and ordered two pints and paid in Euros.

PS - "joke" is still crap

 

[Official Old Man]

No idea who or what this is, but it just had me in tears.

 

[schmunk]

No idea who or what this is, but it just had me in tears.

Clarke and Dawe - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

 

[jcdenton08]

Clarke and Dawe - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

A classic

 

[Redinpeace]

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit if he has problems with shit sticking to his fur, no he answers, so the bear wiped his arse with the rabbit.

 

[bhafc99]

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit if he has problems with shit sticking to his fur, no he answers, so the bear wiped his arse with the rabbit.

You stole that from that book, the one about the talking rabbits, what’s it called again, ah yes - Wash-a-shit Down.

 

[Is it PotG?]

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit if he has problems with shit sticking to his fur, no he answers, so the bear wiped his arse with the rabbit.

I find it very difficult to believe that two such differing creatures would perform their ablutions together. The rabbit would most likely be intimidated by the size of the bear and hence find it difficult to ‘perform’.

I’d imagine that they would crap in separate areas of the copse.

 

[Bodian]

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit if he has problems with shit sticking to his fur, no he answers, so the bear wiped his arse with the rabbit.

But surely if the shit doesn't stick to the rabbit's fur, it's a pointless thing to wipe your arse with - as it will just smear it around?

 

[jackanada]

Two guys AND country and western.
Not two guys doing country and western.
So two guys is a genre of music, or at least a subset of a broader genre only known to musos. Does it have to be a male duet? One suspects the etymology of the term is obscure so not.
Given the barman can distinguish two guys from it's mother genre how come he lumps the entirety of country and western together instead of specifying bluegrass or cowpunk etc?