Song titles or lyrics that are palpably untrue.

[Barnet Seagull]

Aha.

I was watching the news the other day and lo and behold what did I see? Night time.

You see at night time, it gets DARK.

Why?

While the sun stays in one place all the time, the earth is always turning, so the part of it that we're on moves away from the sun until the light isn't able to reach us anymore. It takes 24 hours for the earth to spin all the way around, so that's why it's dark for about half that time, during the night. It becomes light again when our side gets closer to the sun.


So quite frankly, your claim that The Sun Always Shines On TV, looks a little stupid now doesn't it, imbeciles.

 

[Gazwag]

The Waterboys claimed

"You saw the Whole of the Moon"

which is obviously impossible as you cannot see the whole of the moon at any one moment



Great song though

 

[Pavilionaire]

I used to get wound up by Culture Club's Boy George.

"Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?" Of course I do, you bent ponce!...

 

[Barnet Seagull]

Rick Astley. Much admired in the Barnet Seagull househould claimed he was 'Never gonna let me down' or 'desert me'

...and then promptly f***ed off.


wanker.

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

I have not laughed so much for ages.......this is turning into classic Letterbox from Viz.


Crimson-dressed sex-pot Sam Brown revealed to the world that:

"All that I have is all that you've given me"

A tricky one that. Is the song aimed at her mother? In which case I suppose I could wear that. Otherwise is she caliming that until she met the person the song is aimed at, she was in fact, naked and starving and homeless?

If this is the case then i would suggest she is being somewhat ungrateful as she seems unhappy with her lot even now. surely better than the state of affairs she as in before meeting the good samaritan that has obviously helped her out.

 

[Gazwag]

Cliff Richard sang

We're all going on a Summer Holiday"

I'm not I'm going in Easter this year

 

[Schrödinger's Toad]

The Buggles alleged that Video Killed The Radio Star. Are they going to stand by their statement at John Peel's inquest?

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Kylie Minogue cannot be rebuked too harshly.

The pint-sized pop dwarf did warn us in an early song that 'She should be so lucky'.

Judging by the longevity of her stay in the public eye and the fiscal remuneration this has brought her, I think we would all agree, looking at the quality of the material she has produced, she has in fact been remarkbly lucky.

 

[Barnet Seagull]

Cyndi Lauper should also be reprimanded.

I remember time after time getting so drunk that I've ended up in the middle of nowhere, not knowing where the hell i was.

I was lost, I did look but could I find her?

Could I f***, the ginger bitch.

 

[Gazwag]

Lee Marvin claimed (get that deep voice going)

"I was born under a wandrin' star"

Well he doesn't know much about space then does he. Stars do not wander they move in the night sky due to the earths rotation. He may possibly be confused with a comet which may appear to "wander" across the night sky.

Of course if he had really good eyesite when he popped out he may have seen a satelitte which would appear to wander over the night sky. Although even then a satellitte moves in a fixed orbit so couldn't really be classed as wandering more running in a straight line

Twat


Oh and was Lonnie Donegans's Dad really a Dustman?

 

[Seagullible]

the Proclaimers asked 'When you go will you send back, a letter from America'

Obviously not as I'm going to Bognor Regis for my holiday

muppets

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Arrogant hook-nose manilow once warbled:

'I write the songs that make the whole world sing'

I suggest we send the rubber-faced narcissus into the centre of Baghdad and see if the insurgents drop their guns and sing-along-a-manilow.

I'd be surprised.

 

[Barnet Seagull]

Lisa Stansfield got it wrong.

She's been around the world and can't find her baby.

Circumnavigating the globe possibly isn't the best method to be used for finding a lost child.

I'd estimate that a child moves at roughly a speed of 0.4mph unaided.
If powered by an alternative means of transport (barring the use of roller skate based rocket propulsion) this could potentially increase to up to a 400- 500mph airborn.

Given that she's probably only left it alone for a few hours at best (and that it would have to get to an airport and through passport control) better use of her time would be to start looking in and around the council estates of Rochdale.

 

[Icy Gull]

Sting, a legend in his own eyes is also prone to lying. I don't believe that he has even come remotely close to Walking on the Moon.

 

[pasty]

Mama, just killed a man
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger now he's dead.


Uh, don't think so Freddie

 

[Seagullible]

Tears for Fears claim everybody wants to rule the world,
I shelved my plans for world domination years ago and set my sites on owning a small area of land in a small village just north of Brighton where I intend to build a rather pretty stadium

 

[Mick Beard BHA]

Lisa Stansfield got it wrong.

She's been around the world and can't find her baby.

Circumnavigating the globe possibly isn't the best method to be used for finding a lost child.

I'd estimate that a child moves at roughly a speed of 0.4mph unaided.
If powered by an alternative means of transport (barring the use of roller skate based rocket propulsion) this could potentially increase to up to a 400- 500mph airborn.

Given that she's probably only left it alone for a few hours at best (and that it would have to get to an airport and through passport control) better use of her time would be to start looking in and around the council estates of Rochdale.

 

[Bwian]

Blue Moon my ass....

 

[Schrödinger's Toad]

I don't actually believe that Eric Clapton drowned in a river of tears, either - for one thing, he appears to be very much alive. More pertinently, considering the amount of water required to constitute a river, it seems highly unlikely that even a great number of individuals could produce enough tears to create such a body of water.

Even a small brook seems dubious. However, he may only be exaggerating, as it would be theoritically possible to submerge one's breathing organs in a small bowl of tears, and thus drown.

 

[Gazwag]

The Walker Brothers got it wrong when they warned that "The Sun ain't gonna shine anymore"

Maybe they were looking through the same telescope as Lee Marvin and thought his wandrin' star was in fact a meteor on collision course with the earth which when it hit would create a dust cloud big enough to stop anybody seeing the sun shine anymore.

Astronomy lessons all round I think.

But even then the sun would still be shining it just would be able to be seen.