[News] Public Toilets

[Live by the sea]

Too much information !!!!

 

[jessiejames]

Walking past the toilet at Lawns cafe,noticed it was open after being closed for weeks for updating.Looked in to see what they had done and the answer was nothing.So the public inconvenienced for weeks for no gain.

I thought they were putting glory holes in the cubicles.

 

[Questions]

The ladies toilets by The Lido in Worthing used to win national awards because the lady who looked after them was amazing….. she used to put fresh flowers out every day…

 

[Bodian]

I do enjoy it when thread titles tell a story all of their own...

 

[GT49er]

In all seriousness, this is a very important topic. If I move too quickly, there is an immediate need to wee. As a male, I have many options but my dear Old mum was less fortunate and her with her dreadful bladder meant going somewhere required knowing where the toilet options would be. Or she'd never leave the house, which I was always keen to prevent. It's too easy to never leave your home and it's a dreadful way to live.

If they are closing the Lawns toilet for an extended period of time, they really should have a temporary facility in place instead. It's a good half mile in either direction to the next public toilet and that's not acceptable. There aren't enough as it is, let alone to them close them without providing an alternative. This council is an absolute disaster - it's hard to believe they're working for the greater good when almost every issue they involve themselves with becomes a total catastrophe.

Absolutey this. It is a serious problem for many. Sadly it doesn't stop a load of smart-arse tossers thinking it's a hilarious topic for bad jokes. Ha ha ha, aren't I funny and all that.
When they themselves, or maybe an elderly friend or relative they are with, have an emergency moment, hopefuly it'll suddenly slap them in the face that it wasn't so funny after all.

 

[GT49er]

The ladies toilets by The Lido in Worthing used to win national awards because the lady who looked after them was amazing….. she used to put fresh flowers out every day…

Sadly, the idea of employing toilet attendants just doesn't figure in the modern wrld of local governent administration. Cost cutter's logic, innit?
- Do public toilets need attendants/cleaners that have to be employed and paid?
- Yes they do.
- Hmm .... best demolish the toilets then.

 

[dazzer6666]

And haven't been modernised since.

Harsh…plans were submitted in 1903, work is due to start any day now. Funds have been ringfenced.

 

[Sid and the Sharknados]

Harsh…plans were submitted in 1903, work is due to start any day now. Funds have been ringfenced.

The money will no doubt turn out to have been pissed up the wall.

 

[Zeberdi]

The money will no doubt turn out to have been pissed up the wall.

That would be a terrible waste

 

[Popeye]

I try to avoid using public restrooms if I can. Most businesses from my experience are pretty lax in cleaning them.

 

[birthofanorange]

I was on a walk from Shoreham up to Devil’s Dyke. I stopped and got some sweets for energy and set off. Munching away. Got to that slope that leads up to the pub. Maybe 300 metres to go.
A cold sweat started on my brow and spine, my stomach gurgled, everything became loose.

I scanned the area. No cover. No trees. No mounds. Just a clear run up to the pub with people looking down from the car park. I was so desperate, if I left it another 30 seconds I’d fill my scrudders.

I found a small gully that was on a corner of a path that leads down to a small village.

A dynamic risk assessment concluded this was the only option but with the risk of someone walking round the corner at any moment.

I dived in, squatting and pulling undercrackers down in one movement and shat about three litres of swamp water.

Now, what to wipe with? All I had were two cheese rolls. They would have to do. I cleaned up as best I could, left the excrement soaked cheese rolls and my puddle of shat. All in a shaky knee’d rush. I suppose trousers down ‘til trousers up was about 25 seconds. I feel deeply sorry for whomever turned that corner and discovered that horrific scene. It made me feel sick enough and it came out of me.

Clearly I hadn’t wiped enough as after ten paces it was a f***ing casserole down there.

Cheese crumbs and bread roll bits hitching a ride in my Alans.

I thought I was in the clear but the same feeling came back after about 5 mins. I ran to the pub, went straight into the disabled’s and somehow produced another few pints of grotty shit-water.

It all calmed down but I was afraid to leave the relative safety of the pub toilet. But I had to get home. I gathered my courage and did a Butch and Sundance run for it from the shitter.

It was a treacherous walk to the coast road to get a bus home to Shoreham.

I got lost in Southwick, surprisingly easy to do. I had to duck into the then still operational Albion pub. Again, my guts produced even more muck than I thought possible.

The only consolation being I probably improved the place. Ghastly pub that I think is now permanently shut.

I eventually made it home without shitting myself and after literally shoving my then girlfriend out of the way, sat in my bathroom for about an hour. Sipping water and shuddering filthy bilge out of my ringer.

Upon emptying my rucksack I put the empty sweet bags on the kitchen top and my ex looked at them.

“Sugar free laxative fruit chews. Consume no more than 4 in any 24 hour period. You f***ing idiot”
I had eaten two full bags. Maybe 30-40 of them.

As my knees buckled for a final time and I slumped to the kitchen floor, I couldn’t help but agree with her. What a f***ing idiot.

Fabulous tale, but it leaves me with one burning question - what kind of cheese was in the rolls?

 

[Gwylan]

Who needs public toilets? I was at a bus stop in Moulsecoomb a few years when a bloke pulled down his keks, squatted in the gutter and curled one out.

Simple but effective

 

[timbha]

Who needs public toilets? I was at a bus stop in Moulsecoomb a few years when a bloke pulled down his keks, squatted in the gutter and curled one out.

Simple but effective

Simple, effective but where did he wash his hands and powder his nose?