[Misc] Older Dads

[Joey Jo Jo Jr. Shabadoo]

I was 33 when I met the kids mum (she was 10 years younger), she already had a daughter who was just over a year old who has only known me as Dad. I was 35 when my oldest son was born, 36 when my younger daughter was born, and nearly 38 when my youngest son was born. 3 kids in just over 2.5 years is a bit of a shock and I did worry that i'd be one of the oldest Dads on the playground. However I've found that there is a wide spread of ages in the parents. My next door neighbour is the same age as me and they've got a son the same age as my youngest daughter (although they do have 3 others who are adults now). Most of the parents at the cricket club my boys play for are of a similar age to me. I totally get the feelings the OP is having but I think you'll find it will be ok, and as others have said keep fit and active (running around after the kids certainly does help in that respect), although I am lot greyer than when I started.

 

[AlbionBro]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

Congratulations young man.
Enjoy it and stop there....twos company threes a crowds. Get yourself fit and I am sure you will have plenty of energy to give so much to them both for years.
My mate is 60 and he has just adopted, a young one...his wife is 20 years younger too....and he is loving it.

 

[Curious Orange]

I was 39 when Littlest Orange was born, and it wasn't really a problem as there is definitely a trend to having kids a bit later in life. In some ways finding out some of the other parents are so young is more of an oddity!

 

[Triggaaar]

Quite similar to me, I was 33 when I had my daughter

That is not old.

 

[AlbionBro]

I was 39 when Littlest Orange was born, and it wasn't really a problem as there is definitely a trend to having kids a bit later in life. In some ways finding out some of the other parents are so young is more of an oddity!

So did you call her Mandy rin?

 

[zefarelly]

34 . . .My parents were 22/21 . . . They got married and bought a house pretty quick! Things were different in 1970/71

I wouldn't have wanted to be much older, but frankly wasn't daft enough, or in a sensible position to do it much earlier.

the fact my parents divorced by 30 and I haven't after 20 years+ says a lot, to me at least.

T he other issue is, I wouldn't have taken that decision and that responsibility without being able to provide. . . this country has changed immeasurably in the last few generations.

It does seem to be a lifestyle choice for a certain section of society to bang a few out ASAP

TBH I've never considered either end of the scale to be an issue, per se, but I do think a few extremes are odd lifestyle choices.

 

[nwgull]

47 with a 6, 5 and 1 yo. Have never considered it an issue. Just look after yourself - keep fit and eat well - and you’ll be doing active-dad stuff well into their teenage years and beyond.

I’m aiming on retiring, or at the very least becoming a TWaT, at age 55 so Im more available to help them through the tougher years at school.

 

[Wilko]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

I became a dad in November last year at the age of 45. For me, it was right and I love everything about being a dad, I think I would have been too immature when I was younger or constantly looking for a babysitter so I could still go out all the time!

Congrats and enjoy x

 

[Simster]

41 isn't really that old is it?

I was 40 for my third and tbh I can't honestly say I felt particularly old, and I doubt you will. Maybe it depends on the demographics of where you live, but in middle class Reigate I reckon I was in the top third age-wise by then.

 

[Ⓩ-Ⓐ-Ⓜ-Ⓞ-Ⓡ-Ⓐ]

I’m 39 and have 2 kids 3.5 and 1.5 can’t say I’ve found other Dads around Brighton and Hove to be particularly younger, if anything I find most tend to be older than me

 

[tedebear]

Just don't start every conversation or story with "in my day" and you'll be fine...there is nothing worse than always comparing today and what kids are in the here and now to back then...it will never ever compare...so don't even try and do it...

 

[METALMICKY]

Had twins at 49.

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

Oh look at me, having sex still in my 40’s


In all seriousness congratulations

your life experience will be much more useful than getting on the egg and spoon podium, anyway, everyone’s a winner these days!

All the best

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

My Dad was a couple of years younger when he had me. A few of mates were shocked that he could remember the war ending but him being the older Dad never bothered me in the slightest.

That means you must be . . .two years old. Behold: a child prodigy!

On a more serious note, I became a step father to a 2 year old when I was 53. The nipper, now 12, has a lot to say about me, much of it critical, but being 'old' isn't part of the portfolio she keeps in her cathedral of ridicule.

I was born in 1958, my dad in 1924, and his dad in 1870. And my son has just become a dad aged 37. The only rebel was me who became a dad age 27. Too young by far.

I seem to recall that @attila 's dad was getting on a bit when he was born.

It is what it is. Everything else being evenly distributed among the population, a kid always loves a kind and caring parent.

The value 'others' and their 'different' views has been described eloquently by Mullery during a game we played at Shitehole park many years ago.

Mullery in V-sign storm

In a ‘friendly’ match in August 1973, Albion beat Crystal Palace 2-1, with goals from Ken Beamish and John Templeman. Regrettably, there was crowd trouble at the Goldstone. Even so, coo…

thegoldstonewrap.com

 

[madinthehead]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

I am 49, my 3 daughters are 9,6 and 2.. Nowadays, at least in Germany the Dads aren't that much younger.My kids are myvlife and I love parenthood! I really haven't found any problems at all. If you have qs or wanna natter, drop me a PM.

 

[nicko31]

Found out quite recently that I am expecting my second child, all going well he/she will arrive a few months after my 41st birthday.

Genuinely didn't think i'd have the chance again at 40 and am over the moon but naturally a bit worried about being the older Dad in the playground. My Dad was 45 when he had me and it definitely bothered him more than it did me!

Any other 'older' Dad's out there have any tips or experiences?

Vacate to the spare room for the first few weeks

 

[zefarelly]

Just don't start every conversation or story with "in my day" and you'll be fine...there is nothing worse than always comparing today and what kids are in the here and now to back then...it will never ever compare...so don't even try and do it...

Point taken.

the 70's was pretty free form jazz for kids though, at least in southern England

 

[The Optimist]

39 and 42 when I had mine. Oldest is 4 now and never really think about my age when meeting other parents at nursery etc.

I do sometimes wonder what it’ll be like being 60 with an 18 year old, but maybe I just have the wrong idea about what it’s like to be 60.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Also, when our nipper is listening to Dua Lipa, while I'm listening to Black Ceiling remixes of Dua Lipa (which she hears and likes), who's the one serfing the cutting edge? Eh? Eh?

 

[BevBHA]

I’m mid twenties and have a 2 year old and have to say from my experience it’s more common now to see parents 35+ than it is to see others my age. Especially noticeable at nursery pick ups, i don’t think I’ve seen another parent who looks under 40 in the year or so he’s been going. None of my mates have kids. Luckily the Mrs brother and sister both have 2 and 3 kids respectively and are just turning 30 so he does have cousins to visit etc.

Fair play to all the posters who have kids later in life. It’s the hardest but best thing that’s ever happened to me. It’s exhausting but rewarding, seeing his little face light up whenever I get home from work. However we’ve both said that we personally wouldn’t have any more after 30, any we do have will be before then.