man caught having sex with his bike

[Simster]

Not if it clogs up ALL your moving parts.

Yes, yes. Sadly we're all too aware that women LIKE to talk.

Christ on a bike theres a thought - they've also saved an unwanted pregnancy - just IMAGINE if he'd jizzed on the seat and some poor unsuspecting girl rode it next? Bloody nora - an unwanted child, a custody battle, benefits and the LOT - this decision is getting better by the minute!

PS. old jizz spraying off a bicycle is just soooooooooooo last year! us women prefer it fresh don't you know

How old does jizz have to be before it's not fit for purpose? Anyone know?

 

[tedebear]

A quick goggle came (pardon the pun) up with this gem:

How Long After Ejaculation Sperm Live
Sperm exposed to room air on clothing, bed linens or toilet seats lose motility (the ability to swim) rapidly. Once the semen dries out, the sperm are usually dead.

If the semen is near the woman and no fertile fluid is present, they will die within a few hours in or out of the body. If there is fertile fluid from her, they can live for a week waiting for the egg to be released (which probably won't wait a week to be released with fertile fluid present).

That said, you should take basic caution after sex that you've cleaned up any big splashes on her or around her.

 

[Lady Bracknell]

How old does jizz have to be before it's not fit for purpose? Anyone know?

When it gets skin on the top?

 

[Simster]

When it gets skin on the top?

Lovely.

 

[Woodchip]

I wonder if he's banned from owning a bike? Much like pet owners thatabuse them.

 

[seagullsovergrimsby]

Thought he should have been given at an ASBO (ANTI SEX with a BIKE ORDER)

 

[Questions]

He should grow up and buy a tandem.

 

[seagullsovergrimsby]

He should grow up and buy a condom.

No jizz on the saddle then.