"Tricks of the trade"

[getz]

What tricks of the trade can you tell us about in your profession

 

[METALMICKY]

I can seriously recommend NOT sharing your tricks of the trade on a public footie based chat forum.

 

[WhingForPresident]

ALWAYS two in the pink, one in the stink.

 

[Joey Jo Jo Jr. Shabadoo]

I work in IT, "have you tried turning it off and on again" doesn't actually do anything but gives us a chance to google your problem while you are re-starting your PC.

 

[Nibble]

Smile at the director, nod at the director, agree with the director. Then do exactly what you were going to do in the first place.

 

[beorhthelm]

I work in IT, "have you tried turning it off and on again" doesn't actually do anything

er, yes it does and im shamed if you work in IT and dont know this

 

[Hamilton]

When you write a sentence, try to use words that contain no more than two syllables. Damn it!

 

[Joey Jo Jo Jr. Shabadoo]

er, yes it does and im shamed if you work in IT and dont know this

I was joking.

 

[The Large One]

Tell the ad sales people they can't have that colour. Or typeface.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

A main trick of the trade would be not to give away the tricks of the trade.

 

[Vegas Seagull]

A main trick of the trade would be not to give away the tricks of the trade.

Unless you can charge £500 a day, like I do...

 

[Meade's Ball]

I take calls for a chunk of the day. I tell whoever is on the other end that i'll get the matter urgently sorted and remove the worry from their minds. I sign off the call with the name Barry Hinds, which isn't my name, return the receiver to its cradle, and then log on here to think of the next foolish thing to say, performing no professional task at all. The secret of good customer service is to deceive and mislead effectively and speedily so the whingeing botherers arse off and i can get back on with my life.

 

[Goldstone1976]

If you ever have need of an accountant or a lawyer, always tell them the complete truth. They can't do their job properly if you don't.

 

[atfc village]

How were the toilets at The Shit Stad Yesterday ?

 

[Telscombe Seagull]

How were the toilets at The Shit Stad Yesterday ?

We didn't play Palace away yesterday!

 

[atfc village]

Sorry i meant The Sad Stad ,Lets just say Would you let an Aldershot fan work on the Drainage when it was Built ?

 

[spongy]

Measure twice, cut once. After all, you can cut a bit off but you can't cut a bit on.

 

[kevtherev]

Threaten to go and play golf if I don't get my own way.

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

When I worked in A&E and needed a break from the grind I would walk around purposefully with a clipboard looking at things on shelves and scribbling a load of bollocks.

That, my friends is why you wait for hours in there..all the medics are doing the same thing....oh, and eating sweets and checking their Facebook.

 

[METALMICKY]

A main trick of the trade would be not to give away the tricks of the trade.

Exactly what I said!