The Apprentice 2016 thread

[Lady Whistledown]

Once again, the BBC have searched high & low to find another box of idiots, ready to be opened up and laughed at.

Here are this year's prime specimens for your delectation & cogitation.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/5NJRj7JhcnNp5WKzq12nn8y/meet-the-candidates

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-e...gar-karren-brady-claude-littner-a7332351.html

 

[Lady Whistledown]

"If I wanted to be like everybody else I'd have waxed my monobrow"

 

[Lady Whistledown]

"My wife calls me Mr President"

 

[Lady Whistledown]

"I'm the female version of Jim Carrey"

 

[Joey Jo Jo Jr. Shabadoo]

 

[Tooting Gull]

Don't know if it is just my imagining it, but the average age of contestants seems to be sneaking up a bit. Maybe they want them to be a bit more rounded.

Fat chance.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Don't know if it is just my imagining it, but the average age of contestants seems to be sneaking up a bit. Maybe they want them to be a bit more rounded.

Fat chance.

He's 37, runs a men's beachwear company.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

"I'm the female version of Jim Carrey"

I'm guessing that 'Online fashion entrepreneur' means that she's sold a few of her unwanted frocks on eBay?

First impressions are that the blonde Welsh girl looks quite TIDY, and that Dillon St.Paul will be this year's absolute WANKER.

 

[Bry Nylon]

Lord Sugar: " What were you thinking? Okay - so you got a good deal on paper, but there was no planning, no thought, no execution. The whole strategy was flawed from the beginning. It's a bloody shambles!"

Contestant: "Sorry, Lord Sugar."

Lord Sugar: "I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about Karen moving West Ham to the London bleedin' Stadium."

 

[Simster]

First impressions are that the blonde Welsh girl looks quite TIDY, and that Dillon St.Paul will be this year's absolute WANKER.

Yes. Just LOOK at him FFS:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/38mwF8V5MgVFcvP59kf9f6l/dillon-st-paul

 

[Simster]

Lord Sugar: " What were you thinking? Okay - so you got a good deal on paper, but there was no planning, no thought, no execution. The whole strategy was flawed from the beginning. It's a bloody shambles!"

Contestant: "Sorry, Lord Sugar."

Lord Sugar: "I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about Karen moving West Ham to the London bleedin' Stadium."

Sounds like something you'd probably see on that "Sainbury's Basics" Spitting Image rip off, whatever it's called.

 

[Bry Nylon]

Sounds like something you'd probably see on that "Sainbury's Basics" Spitting Image rip off, whatever it's called.

Tough audience.

What were expecting on NSC on a Tuesday lunchtime? Tolstoy?

 

[Simster]

Tough audience.

What were expecting on NSC on a Tuesday lunchtime? Tolstoy?

Sorry Bry, I do normally find your jokes amusing, it's just that this one was a bit POOR.

 

[Notters]

He's 37, runs a men's beachwear company.

So long as we don't have to see him in speedos.

 

[Official Old Man]

My Wife is featured this year. I'm not allowed to say anything as I've signed a 200 page book bigger than the official secrets act, but they filmed on the day BHA were at Boro. What a choice I had, 30 seconds of fame or 2 wasted hours in Boro.

 

[Simster]

My Wife is featured this year. I'm not allowed to say anything as I've signed a 200 page book bigger than the official secrets act, but they filmed on the day BHA were at Boro. What a choice I had, 30 seconds of fame or 2 wasted hours in Boro.

Are we allowed to guess which candidate she is? Or is she on one of the challenges? (my sister in law did that last year)

 

[Goldstone1976]

Tough audience.

What were expecting on NSC on a Tuesday lunchtime? Tolstoy?

"They don't even give one time to dwink...they keep dwagging the wegiment to and fwo all day". This was positioned to me as a schoolkid as an example of the great wit of Tolstoy. Blimey. Perhaps there's some pun I'm missing in translation...?

 

[RM-Taylor]

Obvious that Dillon will be the first one fired. You can always tell who the first one to go will be when these are released.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

He's 37, runs a men's beached whale company.

Fixed that for you

 

[deletebeepbeepbeep]

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