Solving the early leavers problem

[Meade's Ball]

A brief interrogation as to the reasons why would suffice. Anyone complaining of a stomach upset would have to release a live wet guff into a sponge held by one of our muscular quizzers. Perhaps honesty would see people through most. I JUST DON'T CARE THAT MUCH, would be a straight winning answer. I ACTUALLY SUPPORT ________ would not be good enough. A single bead of sweat by the answerer would give away their deceit and they'd be shepherded down into one of the under-stadium cells until morning. That mightn't be good news for fat people, but as soon as you manacle one blubberbus, then the others should all receive their online Portly Gulls updates and know to not be at the exit gate any speedier than the 5 minutes it would undoubtedly take from hoisting point to waddle pace.

 

[Return of the Rev]

Or we could throw jam over early leavers and get each bus to have a fully working beehive on the luggage rack opposite the driver/bee keeper

ALL LEAVING AFTER FULL TIME WOULD GET A BEE KEEPERS SUIT TO PUT ON,A DEPOSIT OF 25 EUROS WOULD HAVE TO BE PAID THIS WOULD BE REFUNDED ON EXITING THE BUS AND PLACING THE SUIT IN THE ATTACHED TRAILER

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

Or we could throw jam over early leavers and get each bus to have a fully working beehive on the luggage rack opposite the driver/bee keeper

ALL LEAVING AFTER FULL TIME WOULD GET A BEE KEEPERS SUIT TO PUT ON,A DEPOSIT OF 25 EUROS WOULD HAVE TO BE PAID THIS WOULD BE REFUNDED ON EXITING THE BUS AND PLACING THE SUIT IN THE ATTACHED TRAILER

regards
DR

 

[Weststander]

video, name and shame on the big screens as they leave - a kind of reverse Fanzone

All 10,000 of them.

 

[dougdeep]

Are you stupid?

Yes, yes he is. When do the schools go back?

 

[8ace]

Or we could throw jam over early leavers and get each bus to have a fully working beehive on the luggage rack opposite the driver/bee keeper

ALL LEAVING AFTER FULL TIME WOULD GET A BEE KEEPERS SUIT TO PUT ON,A DEPOSIT OF 25 EUROS WOULD HAVE TO BE PAID THIS WOULD BE REFUNDED ON EXITING THE BUS AND PLACING THE SUIT IN THE ATTACHED TRAILER

 

[Return of the Rev]

yes, yes he is. When do the schools go back?

oooh oooh i know the answer to that one!

 

[backson]

Everyone's going for the stick approach, rather than the carrot. We need to give people an incentive to stay until the final whistle.

How about some entertainment? I don't know, put some kind of tournament or game of some description on the big green rectangular thing in the middle of the stadium? People will stay to watch that.

 

[Return of the Rev]

Everyone's going for the stick approach, rather than the carrot. We need to give people an incentive to stay until the final whistle.

How about some entertainment? I don't know, put some kind of tournament or game of some description on the big green rectangular thing in the middle of the stadium? People will stay to watch that.

I WANT 5 ORGANIC CARROTS AND I'LL WAIT TILL 90 MINUTES

 

[Mowgli37]

Simple, expand the station by about 5 platforms and provide at least twenty more buses

 

[backson]

I WANT 5 ORGANIC CARROTS AND I'LL WAIT TILL 90 MINUTES

Well what you get up to in your spare time ....

 

[Benson]

Everyone's going for the stick approach, rather than the carrot. We need to give people an incentive to stay until the final whistle.

How about some entertainment? I don't know, put some kind of tournament or game of some description on the big green rectangular thing in the middle of the stadium? People will stay to watch that.

What, similar to a football match or such like??
Nah, would never work.

 

[Return of the Rev]

well what you get up to in your spare time ....

at least 10 carrots

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

Yes, yes he is. When do the schools go back?

THAT'S A DODGY QUESTION DOUG
regards
DR

 

[Benson]

It does seem odd that we are all as proud as punch about our shiny new stadium but some want to get as far away from it more quickly than they want to get to it.

 

[timbha]

early leavers are automatically enrolled in an Albion version of It's a Knock Out where: stair cases wobble, powerful water jets are fired at them, they are made to descend the steps wearing huge heads and feet, then they have to run from the stadium to the station dodging random huge boxing gloves on poles trying to knock them over.............this is all beamed back to the remaining 15,000 in the stadium. And of course there will be the obligatory turntable with slippery gunk on it for them to navigate at the station. Here come the Belgians!

 

[Return of the Rev]

early leavers are automatically enrolled in an Albion version of It's a Knock Out where: stair cases wobble, powerful water jets are fired at them, they are made to descend the steps wearing huge heads and feet, then they have to run from the stadium to the station dodging random huge boxing gloves on poles trying to knock them over.............this is all beamed back to the remaining 15,000 in the stadium. And of course there will be the obligatory turntable with slippery gunk on it for them to navigate at the station. Here come the Belgians!

Jeux Sans Frontieres-Ostrich Game - YouTube

 

[Weststander]

It does seem odd that we are all as proud as punch about our shiny new stadium but some want to get as far away from it more quickly than they want to get to it.

Is simply boils down to leaving 10 minutes earlier, gets you home an hour earlier.

Perhaps one day if the train station/platforms are upgraded, and somehow the buses upped in a big way, almost everyone will stay.

 

[blue2]

Lock the doors

 

[Hillian1]

Or we could throw jam over early leavers and get each bus to have a fully working beehive on the luggage rack opposite the driver/bee keeper

ALL LEAVING AFTER FULL TIME WOULD GET A BEE KEEPERS SUIT TO PUT ON,A DEPOSIT OF 25 EUROS WOULD HAVE TO BE PAID THIS WOULD BE REFUNDED ON EXITING THE BUS AND PLACING THE SUIT IN THE ATTACHED TRAILER

Brilliant.

Simple and BRILLIANT.