[Misc] Sayings your old mum or dad said.

[Questions]

Ordering our Thai take away tonight I thought of what my old mum would have said to me……. Gawd blimey your eyes are bigger than your belly.

 

[KZNSeagull]

If it's gone quiet at the dinner table, it must be 20 past the hour.

 

[happypig]

Ordering our Thai take away tonight I thought of what my old mum would have said to me……. Gawd blimey your eyes are bigger than your belly.

My old mum would have been 90 today. After I polished off a big dinner she'd say "you got hollow legs ?"

 

[Weststander]

Put the bit of wood in the hole.

 

[Questions]

You make a bleeding better door than a window…… when I blocked her view of the tele.

 

[ROBS BROTHER]

The evenings are drawing in

 

[Icy Gull]

Stop being so mardy

If you don’t start behaving there’ll be Whigs/Wigs on the green.
Still have no idea where that came from but I was in trouble when she said it

 

[The Wookiee]

My gran used to say to me “I know you are fibbing, I can see your eyes spinning round”
But Gran (RIP), it really wasn’t me who ate all the biscuits!

 

[Seagull58]

I never drink water, fish f*** in it

 

[Seagull58]

When told " your hair's getting thin", "who wants fat hair"?

 

[R. Slicker]

My old mum would have been 90 today. After I polished off a big dinner she'd say "you got hollow legs ?"

Mine would say 'I'd rather keep you a week than a fortnight'.

 

[PeterOut]

Stop being so mardy

If you don’t start behaving there’ll be Whigs/Wigs on the green.
Still have no idea where that came from but I was in trouble when she said it

Origin of 'wigs on the green' - https://wordhistories.net/2019/02/07/wigs-green-origin/

 

[R. Slicker]

All fur coat, No knickers.

 

[Muhammed - I’m hard - Bruce Lee]

I’ve told you once.
If you fall off and break your leg, don’t come running to me

 

[Eeyore]

'Shut the door, were you born in a barn ?'

My favourite

'You'll land me up Haywards Heath'

A reference to bad behaviour driving Mum nuts.

 

[SIMMO SAYS]

My old mum says 'There's nowt so queer as folk'

 

[Goring-by-Seagull]

My dad used to say to me "not as long as the hole in my arse points downwards"
And
"whoever's idea it was to <insert almost anything - put traffic lights here, chop down that tree, organise a party - anything> wants bloody shooting"

 

[Taybha]

Make sure your pants are clean just in case you get run over.

 

[FIVESTEPS]

Don't let a woman or an idiot see a job halve done.
Only Allahs perfect.

 

[shingle]

Mum used to say, don't stir with a knife, you'll stir up strife.

Even now, I can't use a knife to stir things.