Got something to say or just want fewer pesky ads? Join us... 😊

put a smile on ....



Deportivo Seagull

I should coco
Jul 22, 2003
5,997
Mid Sussex
Subject: FW: Modern Slang



GOING FOR A McSHIT -

Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're
just going to the bog.
If challenged by a pimply pre-pubescent staff member, your declaration to
them that you'll buy their food afterwards is a Mcshit with Lies.

AEROPLANE BLONDE

One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

AUSSIE KISS

Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

BEER COAT

The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
at 3 in the morning.

BEER COMPASS

The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a night on
the lash, even though you're too pi$$ed to remember where you live, how you
got there, and
where you've come from.

BOBFOC

Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.

BREAKING THE SEAL - or another name is FFP (First Fatal Piss)

Your first pi$$ in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
required every 10 or 15 minutes for
the rest of the night.

BRITNEY SPEARS

Modern Slang for 'beers', e. g. "Couple of Britneys please, Doreen".

BRUCE LEE

Erect nipple (as in, a hard Nip).

DRINK-LINK

A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is
common to visit one before going out on the booze.

SSSSSSSSSSHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTT

The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a speed.

GREYHOUND

A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

JOHNNY-NO-STARS

A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works
in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying
stars that
staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training.

MILLENNIUM DOMES

The contents of a Wonderbra, i. e. extremely impressive when viewed from
the outside, but there's actually f*ck-all in there worth seeing.

MONKEY BATH

A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa!Aa!Aa!".

MYSTERY BUS

The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so
the pub is suddenly packed
with stunners when you come back in.

MYSTERY TAXI

The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your
bed instead.

NELSON MANDELA

Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager), e.g "a pint of Nelson please,
Doreen"

PEARL HARBOUR

Cold (weather). An example of it would be - "It's a bit Pearl Harbour out
there, (there's a nasty nip in the air)

PICASSO ARSE

A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got
four buttocks.

SALAD DODGER

An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

STARFISH TROOPER OR ARSETRONAUT

A homosexual.

SWAMP-DONKEY

A deeply unattractive woman.

TART FUEL

Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.

TITANIC

A lady who goes down first time out.

TODGER DODGER

A lesbian.

UP ON BLOCKS

Menstruating i.e. out of action, a bit like a car in a garage. e.g. "I
don't think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on blocks".

WALLACE AND GROMIT

Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.

WYNONA RYDER

Rhyming Slang for 'cider'. e. g. "Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a
bottle of tart fuel please Doreen"
 


Albion and Premier League latest from Sky Sports


Top
Link Here