fataddick
Well-known member
Oh my God it's really happening! The latest news is that the odds on Poyet have now been cut to Six to evens, even on odds forward, backwards on a seven-thruppenty 0.027 spread (on the +/- 2 Asian handicap).
That these odds make no mathemetical sense and as are as a result of five moronically optimistic Charlton fans lumping a fiver each on (and everyone else not realising how small and therefore easy to affect the odds of the market for a third division managerial appointment are) is neither here nor there.
Reasons why POYET will *DEFINITELY* be managing Charlton by the weekend are:
1. He once sat next to a guy who sat next to a guy who walked the dog of a guy who once bought a calendar from our club shop.
2. His son Diego isn't allowed to drink (or even point towards) alcohol in Orpington Pizza Express unless his dad manages a team within 10.2 miles of the restaurant.
3. Tony Bloom lost Gus's contract during an ill-judged attempt to expand from poker into competitive Cluedo.
4. The amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
5. Our ground won't fill itself.
6. Our new Chairman has such puppy dog eyes when he looks sad (eg during our TV game on Monday) only the most heartless bastard in the world would say no to him, and Gus isn't that heartless.
7. Our new owners, although they haven't said anything to suggest this and seemingly have a listed combined wealth of about £6.50, can offer Poyet a TEN GATRILLION POUND January transfer fund (at least until he signs his contract, in which case the board will direct him towards the relative of a Nigerian prince who has offered them this sum in an unsolicited and largely misspelt e-mail involving a kidnapping, and also some possible sources of cheap fake Viagra and anti-virus downloads that will eat his computer's face off).
8. Most people who live in Brighton & Hove get the subsidised coach to The Valley instead of going to Withdean anyway BECAUSE TRUE FOOTBALL FANS ARE THAT EASILY SEDUCED YOU MOANING NINNIES.
9. "Fahl mere" is Uruguayan slang for threatening to do something with a horse to someone's wife.
10. The alternative for us is Dennis Wise.
As I understand it Murray, Barnes, Greer, Calderon and Painter will all be joining us on frees as part of the deal, and the only possible sticking point is we are insisting that Gary Hart is included too, but Mr Bloom doesn't like the quality of tracksuits we are offering, so if the whole thing falls through, that's the only reason why.
*crosses EVERYTHING*
*waits*
*waits*
*waits some more*
That these odds make no mathemetical sense and as are as a result of five moronically optimistic Charlton fans lumping a fiver each on (and everyone else not realising how small and therefore easy to affect the odds of the market for a third division managerial appointment are) is neither here nor there.
Reasons why POYET will *DEFINITELY* be managing Charlton by the weekend are:
1. He once sat next to a guy who sat next to a guy who walked the dog of a guy who once bought a calendar from our club shop.
2. His son Diego isn't allowed to drink (or even point towards) alcohol in Orpington Pizza Express unless his dad manages a team within 10.2 miles of the restaurant.
3. Tony Bloom lost Gus's contract during an ill-judged attempt to expand from poker into competitive Cluedo.
4. The amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
5. Our ground won't fill itself.
6. Our new Chairman has such puppy dog eyes when he looks sad (eg during our TV game on Monday) only the most heartless bastard in the world would say no to him, and Gus isn't that heartless.
7. Our new owners, although they haven't said anything to suggest this and seemingly have a listed combined wealth of about £6.50, can offer Poyet a TEN GATRILLION POUND January transfer fund (at least until he signs his contract, in which case the board will direct him towards the relative of a Nigerian prince who has offered them this sum in an unsolicited and largely misspelt e-mail involving a kidnapping, and also some possible sources of cheap fake Viagra and anti-virus downloads that will eat his computer's face off).
8. Most people who live in Brighton & Hove get the subsidised coach to The Valley instead of going to Withdean anyway BECAUSE TRUE FOOTBALL FANS ARE THAT EASILY SEDUCED YOU MOANING NINNIES.
9. "Fahl mere" is Uruguayan slang for threatening to do something with a horse to someone's wife.
10. The alternative for us is Dennis Wise.
As I understand it Murray, Barnes, Greer, Calderon and Painter will all be joining us on frees as part of the deal, and the only possible sticking point is we are insisting that Gary Hart is included too, but Mr Bloom doesn't like the quality of tracksuits we are offering, so if the whole thing falls through, that's the only reason why.
*crosses EVERYTHING*
*waits*
*waits*
*waits some more*
Last edited:
