My friend has a problem...

[Le Premier Cru]

I doubt if this'll rank with the baby seagull but...

...My friend at work has a new, and unwanted pet - a mouse that seems to have moved in now that the weather's getting worse.

A cat seems to be the obvious answer, except that my friend already has two cats that show every sign of complete disinterest. One of them did chase the mouse for a while, in the early hours one morning but, once tired out by all the running, just flopped down in an exhausted heap and has barely moved since. Meanwhile the mouse, doubtless understanding the new licence now extended by the feline population, moves from strength to strength.

It has so far shunned all attempts to lure it into a humane trap.

Any suggestions?

 

[Robot Chicken]

get a NEW cat, a BIGGER and BETTER cat.

 

[Guinness Boy]

Cricket bat, Vanish, Hoover.

 

[Ned]

Chocolate far more tempting than cheese in a trap.

 

[Gwylan]

Chocolate or peanut butter.

We use the latter and it's caught loads of the buggers. We use a humane trap too.

 

[Rangdo]

Some invaluable help here

 

[The Large One]

Attila's got a SNAKE.

 

[Rangdo]

Chocolate or peanut butter.

We use the latter and it's caught loads of the buggers. We use a humane trap too.

I've used a humane trap with peanut butter too. Works a treat.

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

hit it with a shovel.

 

[Le Premier Cru]

Apparently peanut butter's on the 'tried already' list, along with the two Garfields.

What's next?

 

[HampshireSeagulls]

Humane my arse. Follow the example of the South Korean protestors - a tin of Lynx and a lighter, flamethrower the little shit.

 

[Basil Fawlty]

Professional Mouse Catchers?

 

[Trufflehound]

Try a Bazooka

 

[HampshireSeagulls]

Could just get the board game out the loft I suppose. Got to be worth a go

Pointless. I've tried this and the little shits cheat. The move the playing pieces when you aren't watching.

Phone the local mosque, speak in a squeaky mouse-like voice, and tell them that you have dirty thoughts about wimmin in long black dresses and veils.

 

[Meade's Ball]

hit it with a shovel.

My dad hit a mouse with a hammer. The mouse bit his hand in reply. Two years later my dad died in an incident entirely separate from the moose-abuse, unless the little beast moved into his aorta and nibbled endlessly on the coating of his edam heart.
I thought then that i wouldn't mallet a little.

 

[Gwylan]

Attila's got a SNAKE.

Bollocks.






Attila's got TWO snakes.

 

[Publius Ovidius]

flame thrower.....

 

[Trufflehound]

Tie its shoelaces together, then trip it up going downstairs.