Moles

[Bez]

Got some moles causing major damage in the garden. Any ideas how to get rid of them?

 

[pishhead]

 

[northstandnorth]

dont know if it helps but some brat on an advert today said"the doctor used to freeze my MOLES but mum now does it with WARTNER"

any help?

 

[wehatepalace]

The ONLY thing that works is to lay in your garden at night, you will need FULL camouflage gear otherwise the mole will see you.
When the Mole sticks his shiny little nose out of the f***ing great mole hill he's just dug, Twat him over the head with a GREAT BIG f*** OFF SHOVEL !!

 

[scooter1]

That might work for some Mills(McCartneys), but perhaps a little robust for moles

 

[northstandnorth]

as moles dig holes in your garden looking for worms to eat.


get in first, tunnel under your lawn and evict the slimey little fuckers

 

[KNC]

Bury the f*****s ALIVE. That'll learn 'em.

 

[desprateseagull]

call in MI6 ?

 

[Easy 10]

you will need FULL camouflage gear otherwise the mole will see you.

But I thought a MOLE was as blind as a BAT

 

[pishhead]

But I thought a MOLE was as blind as a BAT

I think he meant he will smell his civvy's wheras cammo smells of war and stuff.

 

[Easy 10]

I think he meant he will smell his civvy's wheras cammo smells of war and stuff.

No.
He quite clearly said "the mole will SEE you".

 

[¡Cereal Killer!]

With a shotgun.

Either that or concrete over your lawn.

 

[eastlondonseagull]

Got some moles causing major damage in the garden. Any ideas how to get rid of them?

This one?

.

 

[Normal Rob]

Jasper Carrot has this covered.

Also worth viewing for the dullest youtube video ever...

YouTube - jasper carrott -- the mole

 

[Johnny Crumplin Football]

I had a mole on my chin that was causing me great distress as I kept cutting it when I shaved and it wouldn't stop bleeding. Sorted it with a bit of laser surgery.

 

[NS Herald]

Napalm - works every time for me. Just go down to your friendly neighbourhood US Air Forca Base and ask for a couple of B52's to drop a load!!

Do be warned there may be friendly fire casualties

 

[Jahooli]

1. Wash the moles under plenty of cold, running water. Discard any open ones that won't close when lightly squeezed.
2. Pull out the tough, fibrous beards protruding from between the tightly closed shells and then knock off any barnacles with a large knife. Give the moles another quick rinse to remove any little pieces of shell.
3. Soften the garlic and shallots in the butter with the bouquet garni, in a large pan big enough to take all the moles - it should only be half full.
4. Add the moles and wine or cider, turn up the heat, then cover and steam them open in their own juices for 3-4 minutes. Give the pan a good shake every now and then.
5. Remove the bouquet garni, add the cream and chopped parsley and remove from the heat.
6. Spoon into four large warmed bowls and serve with lots of crusty bread.

 

[Johnny Crumplin Football]

 

[wehatepalace]

But I thought a MOLE was as blind as a BAT

Now, I never knew a mole was BLIND I stand corrected Easy ! But this is even more perfect, as he won't be able to see as the shovel comes down onto his little HEAD !!

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Got some moles causing major damage in the garden. Any ideas how to get rid of them?

Decking