Metro article today

[jackanada]

A young lady with lots of kids
Flaps the size of dustbin lids
"They were like ears of a mouse
But I wanted this house
And opened my womb up to bids"

 

[GT49er]

A woman from Gloucester, quite poor
Had an orgy beside her front door
Said the man who's insider her
"I'd rather drink cider"
Than throw sausages up the M4

A Gloucester girl had lots of fun
giving birth to so many young
the neighbours complained
that her minge was so strained
it looked like a bag of cow tongues.

Oi! Leave Gloucester out of this! Churchdown is part of Tewkesbury now.

 

[The Stout Yeoman]

.

Not much womb in there...