Limericks!

[BrightonBird]

COULD WE HAVE ALBION LIMERICKS PLEASE (and I'll turn off caps lock).

 

[Lush]

There once was a keeper called Ben
Who liked to dribble the ball now and then
But was finally caught out
And McGhee gave a shout
"Don't you ever do that again... you Geordie Twat!"

 

[227 BHA]

There once was a winger called Jonah
Who was barracked by NSC moaners
To get them off his back,
He must either be sacked
OR START PASSING TO f***ing ALBION PLAYERS!!
(sorry, my frustration messed up my rhyme)

 

[227 BHA]

There once was a Ginger Prince
Who wished he could play like Paul Ince
But something is lacking
The boy keeps on slacking
Come on Kerry - You're making me wince

 

[BrightonBird]

Hey that one was good. Wonder if we could have someone to judge them?

 

[The Timekeeper]

There was an ex-manager called steve
who at the first offer did leave
After all he's ex Palace
And had more than one face
And not one true Seagull did grieve

 

[Biscuit]

There once was a boy named jake,
Who had alot of pressure to take,
This young seagull has soul,
He gave it his whole,
And topped it off with a super goal!

mole, bowl, hole, skull, coal......

Doors just there, I know. Sorry

 

[Easy 10]

Piss-poor biscuit.

 

[Tazman]

There was a man from Vancouver,
Who's penis got stuck in a hoover,
The hoover did suck,
Now no more can he f**k,
Or perform some gymnastic manouevers.

 

[Tazman]

There was a man from Nantucket
Whose cock was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a **** I could f*** it!

 

[227 BHA]

There was a young man called Zamora
Who was a hell of a prolific goalscorer
Till he pissed off to Spurs
To play in reserve
His "goals for" total now couldn't be poorer

 

[pasty]

There was a defender called Kerry
Who at Hereford did not make us merry
But when Robbie scored
The opposition were floored
How pissed did I get? Very

 

[Bwian]

A South Stander sat in the rain
Lamented "Withdean's a pain.
The Swan man's a ****
His balls I would punt
So hard that they would reach Spain"

 

[FG aka Football Genius.]

There was an old man called Magoo,
Who took on Brighton without a clue
The lights aren’t on
Its another Dick Knight con
Not a game yet won

 

[Trigger]

There was a young man called FG
Who desperately wanted a wee
But he cum in his pants
At the sight of some ants
And ran head first into a tree

 

[The Great Cornholio]

There was a young plumber from Leigh,
Who was plumbing his wife by the sea.
She said stop your plumbing,
There's somebody coming.
I know, said the plumber, it's me.

 

[Titanic]

FG - that's pathetic - line 5 should rhyme with lines 1 and 2

e.g. "and the team are still playing like poo"

 

[Biscuit]

Piss-poor biscuit.

 

[Jack Straw]

There once was a surrealist from Brighton,
Red arrows pilotted by ants, on course to the bakery.
Owls with helmets.

 

[Biscuit]

There once was a bloke they called 'easy'
He's so slow, old and weazy..
He tried to run,
But fell on to his bum
So he left to do something sleazy...