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- #101
Just want to say thank you to all those who have contributed to this thread - you've given me a lot of food for thought and a lot of encouragement, and yet again in a small way shown how good the NSC community is. 
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Life, And What To Do When You're Fed Up With Yours
- Thread starter Frutos
- Start date
I was probably the same age when the Ex Girlfriend pissed off with another guy, gutted for a short period as had been with her 10 years, to be honest it was going to nowhere city.
So i spent a few months gluging the i feel sorry for myself juice, as she left our home it opened up a new era in the life of Mouldy.
I had to get lodgers in to pay for the house etc, most of these were hand picked from the local pub, they paid my rent and shared my body, good therapy to make you feel better i reckon (short term).
Keep on the social scene it may take a few years you know what you want in a partner right now, so when you ready again go and get em!!
Although i know you feel the job is a big part of it i would go one step out a time assuming your partner is the biggest of the problems.
Best of luck deciding which is the best advice on the thread for you.
Good idea but best to avoid "Revenge" for your drinking I would think..
cmonbarrybringonwoody!
New member
Go travelling mate, I backpacked in oz in 1996 and even now I think about it a lot. Most people I met was there because of stuff back home, failed relationship, dead end job, life going nowhere ( me ) etc. However you're feeling you know you've got a sounding board here. 
Spot on. Also, as others have said, get fitter - swim, run, cycle. Watch the drinking. Plan a holiday. Be nice to the missus (regardless of whether you think it will work). Don't do anything dramatic till you feel strong. Big decisions are best not made when you're feeling down.
I made a series of rash decisions at 21, 25 and 31. It took me 10 years to recover from the last of these. Still . . . . actually . . . . I have no regrets. That's the last point. No regrets.
Best of luck. You'll be fine - partly because you have spoken up. This is an anonymous forum, but again as other have said, always happy to reply tp a PM.
Go travelling for 6 months, or as long as you can afford. Don't go to Oz, go and see some people who's problems will make yours seem insignificant. Asia, Africa, South America etc. You'll come back a different person, and things will seem completely different when you return.
I was probably the same age when the Ex Girlfriend pissed off with another guy, gutted for a short period as had been with her 10 years, to be honest it was going to nowhere city.
So i spent a few months gluging the i feel sorry for myself juice, as she left our home it opened up a new era in the life of Mouldy.
I had to get lodgers in to pay for the house etc, most of these were hand picked from the local pub, they paid my rent and shared my body, good therapy to make you feel better i reckon (short term).
Keep on the social scene it may take a few years you know what you want in a partner right now, so when you ready again go and get em!!
Although i know you feel the job is a big part of it i would go one step out a time assuming your partner is the biggest of the problems.
Best of luck deciding which is the best advice on the thread for you.
Run that one by me again - you got two women in from the local pub and were doing them at the same time, for a rent subsidy. That sounds like a fantastic arrangement.
Basically, I'm 31 years old and utterly fed up with what passes for my life. I'm stuck in a job/sector that holds no particular interest for me and certainly gives me no incentive to go to work each day, yet I'm basically not qualified to do anything else. I'm in a relationship that's lasted for 3 years without really going anywhere, and honestly I'm not sure whether it ever will yet I'm also too insecure and frankly afraid of being even more alone and isolated than is currently the case to risk ending it. In a nutshell I'm sick of my life just drifting along and passing me by with no particular purpose to any of it, I'm just not sure what to do about it.
The thought occurs to me to just jack it all in and spend my savings travelling for a while, in the hope that I'll find something or somewhere or someone or whatever that's right for me, but is that just taking the coward's way out and running away from my problems rather than actually dealing with them? Maybe I should try to find a new job, except I'm stuck in the same situation I've been in as long as I can remember of not knowing what I want to do with my life and as noted earlier I'm probably past the stage of being qualified to do anything except what I already do.
I don't really know exactly where or when it all went wrong for me, I just want to find the right way of somehow salvaging it all. Any advice or tips or whatever from those with any kind of pertinent experience will be gratefully received.
Hey pal, I haven't been able to read through all the answers on here but thought I'd give my two cents as I read this from Colombia having packed in everything in the UK and headed off without much of a plan to Central America.
I'm 26 and had been working in finance for 4 years but really disliked my job and knew it wasn't something I'd ever wanted to do. I was tired of working in London, getting pissed every weekend and just generally wasting my life. I'd also broken up with my missus about a year before so unlike you I was free to drop it all and head off. I saved and headed off with £5k and plan to travel for 3/4 months then settle in Argentina and stay as long as I wanted doing anything - working in a bar, hostel, wherever.
First thing to say is that travelling isn't the solution to all life's problems as some would have you believe. I've never been much of a traveller and I still think moving from hostel to hostel can actually be very repetitive but it has been a fantastic experience. I've been on the road for 3 months from Miami to Colombia via Mexico, Cuba, Belize, Guatemala, Nicaragua, Panama, the San Blas islands (google them) and a very random trip to the Joffre Lakes in Canada. Sat at the Joffre Lakes in one of the most beautiful places on earth I realised how much happier I was there than I'd been in London.
Since leaving I've worked in a hostel, I've worked for an app due to launch in January (and was offered long-term work with them), I'm now working for a language school. I brought my boots with me so I try to play football with locals everywhere I go, I played a rugby match for a Colombian rugby team the other day. I've got some volunteering lined up to help coach some kids from a local school. I'm staying in Medellín for 5 weeks working. I'm not earning any money but you can live here for $10 a day easily if you get a job with free accommodation. It's awesome.
I'm running low on money now and I'm not going to make it to Argentina as I can't get a visa to work there but i've had a load of time to think and I know I don't want to go back home at all. I'm pretty sure my next step will be to Spain to work out there for a while. I honestly haven't missed home once, although that'll change as Christmas approaches. It's been a great chance to stop and think about what you really want form life and to just do stuff that makes you happy every day without a worry in the world. If you like somewhere you can stay, if not you can move on. You can read a book on the beach or climb a volcano or volunteer in a school.
I brought my laptop to do some writing and I've looked into some absolute pipe dreams for my next career move (from coaching football to marketing). It's been unbelievably liberating and has thrown up so many opportunities along the way. It's also eye opening to see how so many people survive with such little money and how small our problems back home are in comparison.
I wouldn't recommend breaking up with your girlfriend. I'd suggest the reason things aren't as good with her is because you're not happy, not vice versa. If you're unhappy with your job though, you've got to quit and force yourself into something better. There's no better time than now. If you're at all interested feel free to read my blog as I've been going. It's pretty stupid but it's got some of the incredible things I've been lucky enough to see over the last 3 months on there.
https://auditorabroad.wordpress.com/2015/07/28/hasta-luego/
Good luck and if you want to ask any questions feel free to get in touch
D
Deleted member 2719
Guest
There wasn't any revenge involved just a bit of self esteem renewal and after all those wenches had it coming, why not me.
D
Deleted member 2719
Guest
If you want to believe that
One day a lodger bought home her boyfriend he was to p***ed and fell to sleep i went to my bedroom and had just got to sleep to be waken by her spinning on me while matey is snoring just feet away with both doors open. There is always a positive when the ex dumps you.
If you want to believe that
One day a lodger bought home her boyfriend he was to p***ed and fell to sleep i went to my bedroom and had just got to sleep to be waken by her spinning on me while matey is snoring just feet away with both doors open. There is always a positive when the ex dumps you.
Ha ha. Sounds like a cracking night. I've got a few tales like that. I cherish the memories but wouldn't want to go back to those days !
D
Deleted member 2719
Guest
Yeah I also have some more in the locker! But like you I have no need to go back but all those nights serve a purpose at the time and have to be done before going back into a lifer relationship.
Dale, maybe a confessions of a north stand chatter thread is due (in the best possible taste)!!
Ha! Catch me for a beer and a pint at the amex sometime!
Trufflehound
Re-enfranchised
Have to agree with the people above who say going off backpacking changes your life.
I was going nowhere with my life, stuck in the old work-pub-sleep-work-pub-sleep cycle, and needed to break out of it. The only thing I was getting was fatter. So I jacked in the job, sold the house, and set off on a 1-year round-the-world trip.
That was in 1988. Haven't worked in the same field I left (IT), or lived in the UK since then. Lost 20kg in weight in that first year as well, and have (more or less) kept it off ever since.
I was going nowhere with my life, stuck in the old work-pub-sleep-work-pub-sleep cycle, and needed to break out of it. The only thing I was getting was fatter. So I jacked in the job, sold the house, and set off on a 1-year round-the-world trip.
That was in 1988. Haven't worked in the same field I left (IT), or lived in the UK since then. Lost 20kg in weight in that first year as well, and have (more or less) kept it off ever since.