Idea's for new television programmes.

[Badger]

South East Today

BBC South East send a reporter to stand outside County Hall, Maidstone and talk live about something that is rumoured to have happened earlier in the week somewhere in Kent.

Oh come on, it's got to at least be PLAUSIBLE.


Bland Designs - People building houses that mirror 1960s concrete tower blocks

 

[The Sock of Poskett]

Celebrity Come Whine With Me - a bunch of C-list celebs invite other C-list celebs around to their house to bitch about each other and complain at what a hard time they get from the meedya

I'm Not Eating That – wannabe celeb chefs tour Britain's B-roads looking for roadkill they can turn into a tasty dish. Followed by a celeb special where the hapless C-list celebs have to guess which animal they were eating.

You've Been Crisped – a not very funny comedian leaps about in public showing ways of tricking the Great British Public in predictably hilarious fashion. Except every jape must involve crisps of some kind.

I'm here all week.

 

[symyjym]

I think I was too stunned to react!

Fair enough.

Call me frigid if you want, but to be honest I would be less likely to empty myself with someone helping me, let alone the thought of it being used in a show.

 

[Pavilionaire]

The Great British Jerk Off.

Contestants are judged on their signature w4nk, technical w4nk and their showstopper. Each week judges Paul Hollywood and Mary Berry then decide on the top jizz merchant and they are made "Star Wanker". The prize for the winner of the series is a seat on the board of Crystal Palace FC.

 

[Lankyseagull]

Time Team:
Tony Robinson and his cronies are sent behind bars to do porridge.

Question Time:
Live coverage of Operation Yewtree police interviews of celebrities.

Home and Away:
New sports results show.

 

[Mellotron]

What a good thread this truly is.

 

[spring hall convert]

Suicide Bummer

A self-confessed homophobe attracted to the studio on the ruse of appearing on "Take Me Out" is given the shock of their life as they have to decide between being the receiptient of anal sex from a very well endowed man or commit suicide on live television.

 

[spring hall convert]

God Hates Bags

An in depth look at the untold damage that plastic bags are causing the environment, presented by THe Westboro Community Church.

 

[Gritt23]

Inner City Sumo?

You get fat people from the inner cities, put them in nappies and film them wrestling. Do it in a pub car park. If you don't do it Sky will.

Arm Wrestling with Chas'n'Dave?

A Partridge Amongst The Pigeons?

Me, in a town square , feeding some Pigeons, going "oh, god!" Etc.
























Monkey tennis?

Funny how sometimes a topic, question, word or discussion just always conjures up the same sketch. I did the same as you when I read the thread title.

I work with a guy called Dan, and if anyone ever calls out "Dan" across the office, I find myself calling it out over and over again, like Partridge in the car park.

 

[Badger]

Funny how sometimes a topic, question, word or discussion just always conjures up the same sketch. I did the same as you when I read the thread title.

I work with a guy called Dan, and if anyone ever calls out "Dan" across the office, I find myself calling it out over and over again, like Partridge in the car park.

It's impossible to avoid Partridgisms. Whenever I hear the word "cheese" I have the urge to shout "smell my cheese you mother" and when I'm having sex I just can't avoid discussing the pedestrianisation of Norwich town centre.

 

[spring hall convert]

Give It To Them Straight

A panel show starring Trisha, Jeremy Kyle & Robert Kilroy Silk. The panel compete against each other to see who drive a teenage mother to self harm.

 

[spring hall convert]

It's impossible to avoid Partridgisms. Whenever I hear the word "cheese" I have the urge to shout "smell my cheese you mother" and when I'm having sex I just can't avoid discussing the pedestrianisation of Norwich town centre.

People forget that traders need access to Diiiiiiixxxons

 

[Gritt23]

Match of the Day.

A group of pyromaniac attempt to see which brand of matches work best in the wet and windy conditions.

 

[spring hall convert]

How Clean Is Your Horse?

Frankie Dettori presents a no holds barred documentary on the different stages of heroin production & the agents that can be added to reduce it's quality.

 

[spring hall convert]

An Idiot, A Broad

Retrospective featuring archive footage of the whirlwind relationship between Peter Andre & Jordan.

 

[Birdie Boy]

The Barber Shop Quartet

Barber, Bloom, Burke and Garcia discussing how to appease fans as they spend as much of Bloom's money on hotels, conference center's, training grounds etc. without buying a striker whilst getting the most money out of fans as they can!

 

[Gritt23]

3-2-1

What the countdown to Palace's inevitable relegation from the Premiership.

 

[Triggaaar]

I'm now feeling sad that we don't have the tv that's on offer in this thread. There are some brilliant ideas here.

 

[spring hall convert]

Gordon Ramsey's REAL Kitchen Nightmares

Gordon walks into a brasserie based in Ealing, West London to be greated by courteous staff, great service & delightful food. Seeing that he won't be able to do his normal day release, sweary Jock, confrontational schtick, just sits in the corner talking to himself for half an hour before being forceably removed by police.

 

[Tricky Dicky]

I'm now feeling sad that we don't have the tv that's on offer in this thread. There are some brilliant ideas here.

All better than anything ITV dreams up.