Best Mans Speech

[seagullwedgee]

I'd like to thank the Bride's parents for their perky little copulator ...... Sorry, their little coffee percolator.

I get nervous every when speaking in public.

 

[Hastings gull]

Mentioning anything about shagging the bridesmaids should be avoided.

Exactly. what age is the audience? This might affect what you would say -the older they are the less likely they would be to laugh at such jokes. Are they all from Sussex? if there are loads visiting our fair county -you could always start with; "welcome to Sussex, gateway to the continent, and home to the incontinent" . . . .

 

[grubbyhands]

The father of the bride looks like Alex Neill, that'll be the last time he laughed like that.

 

[Durlston]

In all seriousness the thought of public speaking gives me panic attacks. It would be the worst thing in the world for me - I'd rather jump out of a plane with a parachute. I'm too self-conscious and would feel paranoid. I admire anybody that looks forward to any form of public speaking.

 

[Green Cross Code Man]

In all seriousness the thought of public speaking gives me panic attacks. It would be the worst thing in the world for me - I'd rather jump out of a plane with a parachute. I'm too self-conscious and would feel paranoid. I admire anybody that looks forward to any form of public speaking.

Unless one has a natural propensity for public speaking, the keys to success are great preparation and knowing your subject. If a good script is written, then the speech will flow and the speaker will be confident. At least, that's my experience.

 

[LamieRobertson]

In all seriousness the thought of public speaking gives me panic attacks. It would be the worst thing in the world for me - I'd rather jump out of a plane with a parachute. I'm too self-conscious and would feel paranoid. I admire anybody that looks forward to any form of public speaking.

I've done it once and i was more nervous than the groom ...he picked me over his brother as he thought i would at least turn up

 

[mothy]

Jokes about the mum of the bride are always popular ;-)

 

[Mellor 3 Ward 4]

Done it three times.

As Mickey Adams would say, failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

Write it out, change it, rewrite it, read it again etc.

I reckon 10 minutes is about right.

Good luck.

 

[HastingsSeagull]

Mentioning anything about shagging the bridesmaids should be avoided.

However doing the deed...................

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Delivering a best mans speech for the first time (and likely only time!) this Friday.

Its written and I'm feeling fairly confident, but thought I'd (probably regrettably) see if NSC has any sound advice / decent one liners I can use to improve it?!

Main things to remember are that a) nobody will be able to hear you from the back tables and b) everybody will have completely forgotten all about your speech about five minutes after you've delivered it. A bit like the weather forecast really: everybody expects it but nobody much cares. REALLY no need to stress over it.

 

[trueblue]

Rehearse it. Go for it. Try to enjoy it. Take the mick out of the groom and be nice to the bride - it's her day. Remember everyone is glad it's you up there rather than them and they're on your side, so no need to worry too much. Most people will be pissed and forget it five seconds later anyway. Even if you're nervous, keep your voice bright and lively... people go with the tone as much as what you're saying so you can get away with all sorts if they like you! Make eye contact and you'll get some encouraging responses. And if you need to take a breath and pause - do it. It will feel longer to you than it is.

 

[Seagull]

I am not bad at speeches but one that went down less well provides the most tips!
1) have a back-up, either fully typed out in your pocket or on cue cards you hold or both.
2) do not get too pissed as others have said, it'll reduce your ability to perform well or deal with hitches.
3) check what other speeches are being given, what they are saying, and how long they are intending to speak for. What's the running order? My "bad" speech came after a 25 minute comedy routine from the groom, which I could not match up to. I struggled to edit / reduce my own speech in real time in front of the heckling restless hordes!
4) know the audience and how well they know you. The more "friendly" the more forgiving they are likely to be.
5) do a trial run and time it; adjust accordingly.
Good luck!

 

[TheJasperCo]

In all seriousness the thought of public speaking gives me panic attacks. It would be the worst thing in the world for me - I'd rather jump out of a plane with a parachute. I'm too self-conscious and would feel paranoid. I admire anybody that looks forward to any form of public speaking.

I echo that to the letter. Problem is, for reasons best known to no-one, I've been chosen to read the closing speech at my graduation next month. In front of 500+ people. Been reading this thread with interest and fear in equal measure.

Wish me luck

 

[dazzer6666]

Write it out
Practice it, again and again. Delivery, length, pauses for laughter.....
Speak slowly - very easy when public speaking to speak far too fast (practice should help)
Try practising in front of a mirror, or film yourself and play it back
Be animated, not monotone
On the day, don't use the 'script', just cue cards. You'll be far more natural-sounding (reading a script usually sounds awful)
Take the piss out of the groom but not the bride
Remember to do all the thank-yous a best man has to do, and the toast
Get pissed after, not before
Good luck [emoji106]Remember at the end of the day most wedding guests will laugh at anything, most wouldn't want to be doing what you are doing and will admire you for it, and you get first dibs on the chief bridesmaid