[Music] Best lyrics in a song

[rudolf hucker]

Santa Claus you ***
Where’s my ****** bike

 

[Norman Potting]

"......My breath smells of a thousand fags and when I'm drunk I dance like me dad
I've started to dress a bit like him. Early morning when I wake up
I look like Kiss but without the make up and that's a good line to take it to the bridge..."

 

[Mr Putdown]

They say you can't take it with you, but I think that they're wrong
'Cause all I know is I woke up this morning, and something big was gone
Gone into that dark ether where you're still young and hard and cold
Just like when they built you, brother, they broke the mould


And

When I look at myself I don't see
The man I wanted to be
Somewhere along the line I slipped off track
I'm caught movin' one step up and two steps back

 

[Mr Cleansheets]

Everything David Bowie ever wrote, with the exception of The Laughing Gnome.

Also: Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way...

But I bet someone's already said that.

 

[Bob!]

The last thing that I saw as I lay there on the floor
was 'Jesus saves' painted by an atheist nutter

 

[ozzygull]

There's Winston Churchill dressed in drag
He used to be a British flag, plastic bag, what a drag
The frog was a prince
The prince was a brick, the brick was an egg, the egg was a bird
(Fly away you sweet little thing, they're hard on your tail)
Hadn't you heard? (they're going to change you into a human being!)
Yes, we're happy as fish and gorgeous as geese
And wonderfully clean in the morning

 

[Ooh it’s a corner]

When England was the whore of the world Margaret was her madam
and the future looked as bright and as clear as the black tarmacadam.

IMHO the best English lyricist of the past 40+ years and not the first of his to be quoted here - Declan Macmanus of course