Bell Cheeses at work

[BlockDpete]

Time to resurrect this fine thread.

Usually my working situation if fine, but I now found myself at another office working with the worst utter moaning jobsworth ever. I've just had the pleasure of working 3 night shifts with him.

He, yes he, spends most of the time moaning about our management, moaning about the job, and the moaning about anything extra he might have to do.

I know its fairly normal to moan about bosses, but getting it for 8 hours of a night shift just does my head in. Plus I think I've got another week of this.....

 

[spring hall convert]

I relearnt a valuable lesson yesterday, people that descibe themselves as a 'people person.' are best avoided.

The 'people person' tends to fall into two camps.

1. The blind spot - This person has no idea that they are a laughing stock and think that people like them. Their mere presence is nauseating in anything more than small measures. Somehow, by virtue of being easily manipulated by obsequious ********s, bosses tend to think the world of these people.
2. A little help from my friends - This person is utterly ****ing useless at their job but by virtue of being a outgoing, nice, reasonable human being and playing on it, generally get to relax whilst everyone else clears up their shit after them. Generally completely lazy.

Happy Friday.

 

[TWOCHOICEStom]

Any IT guys in the house? This one's for you. I hope you share my pain.

I like my place of work. I really do.

But, being that I work as a developer and being that our office is full of the least technical people I've ever met, they seem to think that being a "developer" means that I work in IT Support.

"I can't connect to the internet"
"The text on my screen is all big"
"How do you make the headphones work with skype"
"Tom quick, we've got a conference call with group management and the tv isn't working"
"I can't get my emails on my phone"
"Tom, the printer isn't working"

I can just about handle it that my parents think because I "do something with computers" for a living, I can help Bettie next door to set up her router, but when I'm scrabbling around on my knees on a Monday morning, plugging and unplugging network cables because a colleague can't do basic problem solving, I start to get a little grouchy.

 

[Guinness Boy]

Any IT guys in the house? This one's for you. I hope you share my pain.

I like my place of work. I really do.

But, being that I work as a developer and being that our office is full of the least technical people I've ever met, they seem to think that being a "developer" means that I work in IT Support.

"I can't connect to the internet"
"The text on my screen is all big"
"How do you make the headphones work with skype"
"Tom quick, we've got a conference call with group management and the tv isn't working"
"I can't get my emails on my phone"
"Tom, the printer isn't working"

I can just about handle it that my parents think because I "do something with computers" for a living, I can help Bettie next door to set up her router, but when I'm scrabbling around on my knees on a Monday morning, plugging and unplugging network cables because a colleague can't do basic problem solving, I start to get a little grouchy.

Eliminate this problem at a stroke by joining a software house. All you have to lose is your social skills.

My lead developer who is often pushed for time anyway regularly gets calls from his wife because "the laptops going a bit funny again"

 

[Lower West Stander]

Any IT guys in the house? This one's for you. I hope you share my pain.

I like my place of work. I really do.

But, being that I work as a developer and being that our office is full of the least technical people I've ever met, they seem to think that being a "developer" means that I work in IT Support.

"I can't connect to the internet"
"The text on my screen is all big"
"How do you make the headphones work with skype"
"Tom quick, we've got a conference call with group management and the tv isn't working"
"I can't get my emails on my phone"
"Tom, the printer isn't working"

I can just about handle it that my parents think because I "do something with computers" for a living, I can help Bettie next door to set up her router, but when I'm scrabbling around on my knees on a Monday morning, plugging and unplugging network cables because a colleague can't do basic problem solving, I start to get a little grouchy.

Probably because you go beyond the "have you turned it off and turned it on again" mantra of IT helpdesks the world over. In my experience to get someone in our office to actually come and sort a problem out as opposed to issuing instructions over a telephone (which never ever work) is virtually impossible.

 

[dazzer6666]

Probably because you go beyond the "have you turned it off and turned it on again" mantra of IT helpdesks the world over. In my experience to get someone in our office to actually come and sort a problem out as opposed to issuing instructions over a telephone (which never ever work) is virtually impossible.

At my last place our IT Support was in Lithuania

 

[Peter Grummit]

Having followed this thread intermittently, smug in the knowledge I do consultancy work from home for clients, just travelling for meetings. I've spent the last 10 days seconded in the public sector in central London.

I previously worked in a dynamic but relaxed consultancy office. Now this is a very large open plan office. Mobile work stations. A dreadful hierarchy dominates. If the Departmental head comes around there is much bowing and scraping. When the (black) data entry temps arrive, no-one even says hello, or speaks to them all day. And there is a dog. A large Alsatian who growls at people. He has a food bowl, a water bowl, toys and personal space twice that of the average worker (perhaps wise). You have to bring your own tea mug, tea/coffee/milk/sugar/teaspoon. No glasses or cups for water.

The particular bell cheeses are those who give a running commentary on the details of what they are doing. I think they regard it as 'teamwork'.

Now the money is good and I'm supposed to be here for 40 days. But the commuting and the office will drive me potty by then, and I have more interesting work I could do. Should I stick it out?

PG

 

[Prince Monolulu]

A photo of the Alsatian would help

 

[Adders1]

Ok, now I have acquired a new job, so I feel obliged to vent about a few people in ny old team. The job was an analyst for an Australian investment bank, and my nemesis was a 26 year old fat ginger lad who had a massive coke addiction which no doubt contributed to 1) the fact he was still living with mummy and daddy and 2) his borderline personality disorder.

When I started, and had lunch with him a few times, he would spend the entire hour drinking and slagging off just about everyone else he'd have to communicate with that day, saving his particularly spiteful comments for anyone who wasnt born in the same area of Sydney (think of a sunny version of croydon with more racial tension). Add to that a love for being correct, no formal qualifications and, despite being on the same level as everyone else, thinking he was the manager. it really was the perfect bell cheese storm.

Just a couple of notable things were 1) interrupting everyone's conversations to give his opinion (on any subject) and when challenged would use one of two stock phrases '...can I finish?' Or 'lets move on, weve wasted enough time'. He also had a tendency to monitor exactly what my fellow analysts were doing, even watching their screens,without ever doing any work himself

The final straw came one afternoon when I wss on the phone to an accountant , and he started barking 'advice' at me. (Threatened to tune him in when no witnesses were around and he left me alone after that)

Eventually he got managed out, and on his leaving do everyone told him exactly what they thought of him, which was quite sad in hindsight because he genuinely didnt realize

 

[TWOCHOICEStom]

Ok, now I have acquired a new job, so I feel obliged to vent about a few people in ny old team. The job was an analyst for an Australian investment bank, and my nemesis was a 26 year old fat ginger lad who had a massive coke addiction which no doubt contributed to 1) the fact he was still living with mummy and daddy and 2) his borderline personality disorder.

When I started, and had lunch with him a few times, he would spend the entire hour drinking and slagging off just about everyone else he'd have to communicate with that day, saving his particularly spiteful comments for anyone who wasnt born in the same area of Sydney (think of a sunny version of croydon with more racial tension). Add to that a love for being correct, no formal qualifications and, despite being on the same level as everyone else, thinking he was the manager. it really was the perfect bell cheese storm.

Just a couple of notable things were 1) interrupting everyone's conversations to give his opinion (on any subject) and when challenged would use one of two stock phrases '...can I finish?' Or 'lets move on, weve wasted enough time'. He also had a tendency to monitor exactly what my fellow analysts were doing, even watching their screens,without ever doing any work himself

The final straw came one afternoon when I wss on the phone to an accountant , and he started barking 'advice' at me. (Threatened to tune him in when no witnesses were around and he left me alone after that)

Eventually he got managed out, and on his leaving do everyone told him exactly what they thought of him, which was quite sad in hindsight because he genuinely didnt realize

Ah the classic "know-all who gets away with being a dick because everyone knows that, deep down, he's a sensitive lad and they don't want to make him cry" type of guy.

We've all worked with one of them.

 

[Badger]

*PET HATE ALERT*

The IT/Infrastructure manager has recently decided that everyone in the office should overhear BOTH sides of his phone conversations. Apparently if you're "really important" it's absolutely fine to set your phone to speaker and make sure all the people around you know that you're doing IMPORTANT work.

This is the same guy who only seems to be able to speak a mixture of technical bulls**t and business bulls**t. I'm a software developer so I'm pretty technical myself, but I rarely have any idea what he's BANGING on about. There's a lot to be said for just speaking to people in plain ENGLISH, in the same way you would outside work.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

*PET HATE ALERT*

The IT/Infrastructure manager has recently decided that everyone in the office should overhear BOTH sides of his phone conversations. Apparently if you're "really important" it's absolutely fine to set your phone to speaker and make sure all the people around you know that you're doing IMPORTANT work.

This is the same guy who only seems to be able to speak a mixture of technical bulls**t and business bulls**t. I'm a software developer so I'm pretty technical myself, but I rarely have any idea what he's BANGING on about. There's a lot to be said for just speaking to people in plain ENGLISH, in the same way you would outside work.

I can see your problem here. It is that the person in question is a ****.

 

[Badger]

I can see your problem here. It is that the person in question is a ****.

You're correct. How did you know?

 

[Postman Pat]

OH GOD NO......

We are having a desk move........No details have been announced yet about where we are going, but the usual suspects are already having kittens about moving from their current location.

What if they are sat next to someone they don't like, what if it takes 3 seconds longer to get to the kitchen/printer/front-door, I must be able to see natural light......

It is going to be hell. I'm sure management only do this to upset the sane people in the office by trying to tip the nutters over the edge.

 

[dazzer6666]

*PET HATE ALERT*

The IT/Infrastructure manager has recently decided that everyone in the office should overhear BOTH sides of his phone conversations. Apparently if you're "really important" it's absolutely fine to set your phone to speaker and make sure all the people around you know that you're doing IMPORTANT work.

This is the same guy who only seems to be able to speak a mixture of technical bulls**t and business bulls**t. I'm a software developer so I'm pretty technical myself, but I rarely have any idea what he's BANGING on about. There's a lot to be said for just speaking to people in plain ENGLISH, in the same way you would outside work.

Using speakerphone in an open plan office does my HEAD in. Shooting is too good for these people.

 

[Badger]

Using speakerphone in an open plan office does my HEAD in. Shooting is too good for these people.

Thankfully he isn't in the office every day as he has to go on IMPORTANT site visits in his BMW.*

Meanwhile, I was making myself a coffee in the kitchen this morning when the stupid little dog PISSED on the floor. This is apparently quite normal and one of the guys laughed it off as he WIPED it up with a paper towel. SERIOUSLY, dog piss on the kitchen floor is considered fine, REALLY?




* I haven't seen what car he drives but I assume it's a BMW, or maybe an Audi.

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

Thankfully he isn't in the office every day as he has to go on IMPORTANT site visits in his BMW.*

Meanwhile, I was making myself a coffee in the kitchen this morning when the stupid little dog PISSED on the floor. This is apparently quite normal and one of the guys laughed it off as he WIPED it up with a paper towel. SERIOUSLY, dog piss on the kitchen floor is considered fine, REALLY?




* I haven't seen what car he drives but I assume it's a BMW, or maybe an Audi.

Crimp off a log under the owners desk and leave muddy paw prints back to fidos beanbag?

 

[hans kraay fan club]

In the space of ten minutes this morning, the noise machine came out with:

"merci boocoop" (yes pronounced exactly like that)

"Muchos gracias"

"Lovely jubbly"

"Excellentay"

Seriously, what the actual **** is wrong with these people?

 

[StonehamPark]

Just over 2 hours left people. Stay strong.

 

[Gullflyinghigh]

In the space of ten minutes this morning, the noise machine came out with:

"merci boocoop" (yes pronounced exactly like that)

"Muchos gracias"

"Lovely jubbly"

"Excellentay"

Seriously, what the actual **** is wrong with these people?

I feel your pain, there's a gaggle of rotund warblers here who insist in talking in accents (regional AND foreign) or occasional French (why is it always French?!) phrases for no reason whatsoever.

I hate them. So much.