American visitors

[Giraffe]

Games already have the technology to signal when a ball crosses the line, so it will be standard rules - first ball across the line counts, golden goal.

That's what I figured. I like the idea a lot.

Although I also like the idea of taking a player off each team every ten minutes from 30 minutes in.

 

[Triggaaar]

Penalty time is when there is a game of 11v11 Bulldog with the last man standing's team winning the game regardless of the score.

It's not 11 v 11. You lose a man for every goal the opponents score.

 

[Megazone]

Goals scored from outside the penalty shoot area count for 2 goals. Goals scored inside the 6 yard rectangle area only count as half a goal.

 

[happypig]

No Whooping or shouting "Awesome".
Clapping is a solitary pursuit. In this country we DO NOT offer a "high five" and, if offered one do not reciprocate.

 

[The Albion Roar]

The players don't wear padding.

They don't have nicknames like 'The Chest Freezer' or 'The Knackered Trabant'. Just 'Kaz' and 'Knocky'.

There is no goal music.

No-one clenches their fists and shouts 'Go, Seagulls'.

No-one turns up with a piece of scraggy torn up cardboard box held aloft with a badly spelled slogan about 'kicking ass'.

No-one shouts 'B-H-A, B-H-A' endlessly and repeatedly.

There is no goal music.

Getting pissed first is obligatory. You daren't watch the Albion sober.

The beer is a decent local, not some lorried in corporate superpiss which has first passed through the urinary tract of a honey badger from 200 miles away.

No pigs were harmed in the making of the steak pies.

THERE IS NO GOAL MUSIC.

You might want to tell them we've always been in Brighton, not Crawley, followed by Stevenage, followed by Basingstoke, at their owners' whim.

Don't feel let down when the scoreboard doesn't have a graphic of clapping hands with the slogan 'cheer a goal...'.

The ball is supposed to be round - OK?

THERE IS NO SODDING GOAL MUSIC.

 

[CHAPPERS]

It's either a steak pie or a mistake pie, that's what I 'd tell 'em.

 

[Medwayseagull]

No shouting "touchdown" if a player picks up the ball when out of play behind the goal.

 

[Lyndhurst 14]

Don't think they like soccer

 

[Easy 10]

No-one shouts 'B-H-A, B-H-A' endlessly and repeatedly.

I quite like this. I wish we did.


There, I said it.

 

[brightn'ove]

It's actually Soccer (or Assoc/Socca), aka Football.

Which comes from Association Football ...

 

[The Albion Roar]

I quite like this. I wish we did.


There, I said it.

Hashtag earworm.

 

[StonehamPark]

Which comes from Association Football ...

No flies on you, eh?

 

[Megazone]

Which comes from Association Football ...

Let's just call their game American Rugby.

at least it makes sense.

 

[The Albion Roar]

Let's just call their game American Rugby.

at least it makes sense.

British Bulldogball.

 

[StonehamPark]

It's not 11 v 11. You lose a man for every goal the opponents score.

Hmmm.. I'm not sure about this one as it could be perceived as too boring for the American visitors (too high a chance of a very low scoring game or draw).

I propose that at each blow of the whistle, every player (including goalkeepers) must sprint to a corner flag.
Last man to touch one sits out for the rest of the game. Repeat until close.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Tell them it is considered HILARIOUS, and earns a certain KUDOS, to be the first to shout "GET IN THE GOAL" when the players take kick off.

 

[Withdean11]

They need to actually go inside to get a hotdog. There is no man walking around the stand selling them.

 

[Rugrat]

Tell them when there's any stop in play (ball out of play, free kick etc) it's not a signal for a 10 minute advertisement break

 

[Megazone]

Hmmm.. I'm not sure about this one as it could be perceived as too boring for the American visitors (too high a chance of a very low scoring game or draw).

I propose that at each blow of the whistle, every player (including goalkeepers) must sprint to a corner flag.
Last man to touch one sits out for the rest of the game. Repeat until close.

I like this idea. I can see its potential.
As a suggestion, at the point when there's only 2 footballers left on the playing field both chasing a corner flag. I think it only makes sense for a dance off competition.

The winner stays on the field. The loser gets a Red card and a 3 match ban.

 

[StonehamPark]

I like this idea. I can see its potential.
As a suggestion, at the point when there's only 2 footballers left on the playing field both chasing a corner flag. I think it only makes sense for a dance off competition.

The winner stays on the field. The loser gets a Red card and a 3 match ban.

That sounds good to me.

A Disco ball drops to the center circle and the crowd are encouraged to support their remaining player by dancing like there's no tomorrow.
The Ref and Assistants each hold up scorecards at the end of the dance.