A thread of radical solutions for the GB relay team on how to get the bloody baton round

[Hatterlovesbrighton]

So no improvement since 2009.

Indeed, but can we really say it is "pretty poor" when it's 3 times the medals we won in 2001

 

[Meade's Ball]

Absorbable amphetamines on the batons themselves. Ok you'd have incredibly talkative runners, but surely the genital-shrinkage would make each athlete have less weight to carry and slow them down, and no one runs faster than toward the thing they're addicted to. In my case, if they put an onion ring on each baton i'd go a mile an hour faster in its direction.

 

[Stat Brother]

You lot are so fick.
You can always rely on a cyclist to know how to cheat.


What we need is a 100 metre long baton.

 

[JCL - the new kid in town]

Because the event is a relay with batons. It's not meant to be easy, it's meant to be a skill that teams perfect.

yes i realise this but it feels like its not really a race but a comedy spectacle to see which team messes up. Surely the point is the quickest team should win?

 

[Tooting Gull]

Absorbable amphetamines on the batons themselves. Ok you'd have incredibly talkative runners, but surely the genital-shrinkage would make each athlete have less weight to carry and slow them down, and no one runs faster than toward the thing they're addicted to. In my case, if they put an onion ring on each baton i'd go a mile an hour faster in its direction.

Finally, someone who has really thought about it.

 

[strings]

Is this the same US team that stepped outside their lane yesterday yet escaped disqualification?

The Americans' aren't immune to messing things up, but they do it a lot less than the Brits. Practice is what we need. Practice and experience of running competitive relays.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

The Americans' aren't immune to messing things up, but they do it a lot less than the Brits. Practice is what we need. Practice and experience of running competitive relays.

The Americans dropped the baton in the 4x100m Mens and Womens in Athens 2008, I seem to recall. I reckon they have been practicing very hard on their form since then.

 

[Goldstone1976]

The second, third and fourth runners each carry a baton at the start of the race. They wait until the incoming runner is close enough to make it look like they've swapped the baton over, but just take off with "their" baton already in hand. The incoming runner stuffs his baton down his shorts to hide it as the outgoing runner takes off.

Simples.

 

[TheMajor]

I do believe that GB mens relay practice on being right on the edge of disqualification - as they recognise that they will not make the medal placings if they play it safe. It's a considered gamble to gain them a few vital mili- seconds - some you win some you lose.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

What is the point of the baton really? They don't use one in swimming relays so why don't they use a hand touch as a transfer as with cameras everywhere no one can cheat.

Wouldn't they have failed on that as well, because the baton changed hands outside the box, I believe. So they wouldn't have been able even to touch hands.

 

[Cosmic Joker]

The Americans dropped the baton in the 4x100m Mens and Womens in Athens 2008, I seem to recall.

Your recollection would seem to be at fault somewhere in there, either four years or 5100 miles #pedantry

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Your recollection would seem to be at fault somewhere in there, either four years or 5100 miles #pedantry

D'oh! I watched much of it in Spain, during the early hours of the morning or the late hours of the night. Of course, it was Beijing.

 

[essbee]

The most sickening for me as Mo has alluded to already is the corney way in which the GB team, BBC studio and GB performance chief tried to convince themselves and us that they had won the bronze medal.

Complete tos*ers. For once in your lives do the honourable thing.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

The most sickening for me as Mo has alluded to already is the corney way in which the GB team, BBC studio and GB performance chief tried to convince themselves and us that they had won the bronze medal.

Complete tos*ers. For once in your lives do the honourable thing.

I did find that to be very distasteful. The commentators saying "Let's hope they didn't see it..." "Perhaps we should stop talking about it..." "We'll keep our fingers crossed... [they don't follow the rules]"

 

[Brighton Mod]

hahahahahaha, hahahahaha, haha, hahahahahahahaha, ha.

You need to go back to bed and get up when your head has cleared.


I spent yesterday looking for some specific bile that was generated after our third loss to Derby.
Believe me there was a lot of bile to go through, and yet nothing written here 8 days ago can hold a candle to that statement.

Chapeau.

The Tour an orchestrated three week ride where there are only a few contenders and teams can control most events. Sky are the big money team, the US Postal, I wonder if Verbruggen is ringing them with advance bad news. Rob Hayles tests positive at a World Cup, Brailsford pale, drained on television interview, worried for HIS future. Then the second test is negative, omg how did that happen. Lets hope the new British team will challenge Sky and place this machiavelian manager where he belongs. Just how many people has he fallen out with?

Do you ride a bike or a sofa my friend?

 

[Stat Brother]

The Tour an orchestrated three week ride where there are only a few contenders and teams can control most events. Sky are the big money team, the US Postal, I wonder if Verbruggen is ringing them with advance bad news. Rob Hayles tests positive at a World Cup, Brailsford pale, drained on television interview, worried for HIS future. Then the second test is negative, omg how did that happen. Lets hope the new British team will challenge Sky and place this machiavelian manager where he belongs. Just how many people has he fallen out with?

Do you ride a bike or a sofa my friend?

Wow as equally incoherent last thing at night, as first thing in the morning.
Today, in your company, must have been a ball.

I can't answer above because it doesn't make sense.
Quite why you think DB needs to prove his worth by winning a lottery of a race, that's almost impossible to prepare for, is amazing.

I guess all the gold medals, Grand Tour stage wins, Grand Tour podiums, Grand Tour wins, not to mention stage and one day wins across Europe and beyond account for nothing when up against E3 Harelbeke.


For the record Sky and DB will win a Classic before the end of 2015, because that will be all DB has left to win in cycling.

 

[Questions]

I do believe that GB mens relay practice on being right on the edge of disqualification - as they recognise that they will not make the medal placings if they play it safe. It's a considered gamble to gain them a few vital mili- seconds - some you win some you lose.

Quite a bit of truth in this. The Jamaicans play it safe because they know that they are by far the quickest.

 

[vegster]

Quite a bit of truth in this. The Jamaicans play it safe because they know that they are by far the quickest.

I did hear that the Jamaican's tried to use a baton stuffed with Ganga,in the hope that it got passed around.