Drumstick
NORTHSTANDER
A Pikey's Guide to Speaking Real English
In these days of PSP's, High Definition television and Techno music, it would appear that the advance in technology has had a detrimental effect on the language of our youth. Sadly even some people in their late teens also choose to talk like un-educated cretins. For those of you out there who enjoy talking like complete spastics, I offer the following alternatives:
. 'Bruv' (noun) (referring to another person as your brother as a sign of close friendship).
Alternatives: Chum, Old boy, brother.
. 'Blud' (noun) (similar to 'bruv.' Used when displaying the knowledge that you consider a close friend to be a 'blood brother.')
Alternatives: Blood brother, friend, mate.
. 'Safe' (adjective) (statement incurring that another person is considered 'okay' by the person making the statement.)
Alternatives: 'I think you are splendid old chap.'
. 'Bare.' (gay) (only used by the worst form of pikey scum. Used to describe a large amount or high quality of goods or services.)
Alternatives: (in context) 'Yes, I do have plently of money for the prostitutes.'
. 'Brap, brap, brap' (even gayer) (only used by people with less braincells than pubes, used for unknown reasons for no apparent reason.)
Alternatives: Suicide
. 'Innit' (adjective) (to agree with, or support statements of other pikey.)
Alternatives: 'I agree.' 'I fully support your opinion and would like to second the motion.'
I hope the above has helped some of you out there realise the alternatives to using pikey slang. Have a nice day.
In these days of PSP's, High Definition television and Techno music, it would appear that the advance in technology has had a detrimental effect on the language of our youth. Sadly even some people in their late teens also choose to talk like un-educated cretins. For those of you out there who enjoy talking like complete spastics, I offer the following alternatives:
. 'Bruv' (noun) (referring to another person as your brother as a sign of close friendship).
Alternatives: Chum, Old boy, brother.
. 'Blud' (noun) (similar to 'bruv.' Used when displaying the knowledge that you consider a close friend to be a 'blood brother.')
Alternatives: Blood brother, friend, mate.
. 'Safe' (adjective) (statement incurring that another person is considered 'okay' by the person making the statement.)
Alternatives: 'I think you are splendid old chap.'
. 'Bare.' (gay) (only used by the worst form of pikey scum. Used to describe a large amount or high quality of goods or services.)
Alternatives: (in context) 'Yes, I do have plently of money for the prostitutes.'
. 'Brap, brap, brap' (even gayer) (only used by people with less braincells than pubes, used for unknown reasons for no apparent reason.)
Alternatives: Suicide
. 'Innit' (adjective) (to agree with, or support statements of other pikey.)
Alternatives: 'I agree.' 'I fully support your opinion and would like to second the motion.'
I hope the above has helped some of you out there realise the alternatives to using pikey slang. Have a nice day.