7-1.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

I get it now. You're the village idiot!

Fella, the only thing you get is owned.

 

[Danny-Boy]

He doesn't have the courage to ring 020 78376768 , so posts on here instead.

Is that your London cottage number then, sweetie?

 

[Super Neils Sash Army]

I always think that the entry for Sport on the Croydon page of the Uncyclopedia says it all as far as I'm concerned...

This ones for you Stupor Neils Gash Barmy...

"[edit] Sport
Croydon is home to Crystal Palace F.C, though the club insists it's part of London no one in London has ever heard of it. The local soccer team, Crystal Palace FC, is probably most famous for rearing Ashley Cole to be the bright pansy he is nowadays and celebrity twat Ian Wright. In its 1990s heyday the club hit the headlines because Manchester Uniteds celebrated gobshite Eric Cantona achieved national hero status there after beating a fan senseless. Crystal Palace currently rejoice in their 5th title in as many years in the "Most Ludicrous Strip" competition a title they wrested from Lagos Vampires in 2004. The brightly coloured Clown outfit designed by Simon Jordan and based on the burlesque Harlequin has caused hilarity among opposing fans ever since.

Structure
Crystal Palace chairman Simon Jordan epitomises Croydon, and is somewhat of a local treasure idolised by the subnormal retards that follow Palace who famously share his love for bleached hair, bling, closetness, orange skin, greasy attire and arrogant tosser attitude. It was confirmed in 2009 Jordan is to continue with his highly rated ladies perfume range and move to self tanners.

Financial structure
Jordans business empire, built on his market stall "Simons knick knacks", selling fake "Channel" sunglasses, and "Bolex" wristwatches ceased trading in August 2009 and this is expected to cause CPFC to slide into frinancial difficulties. Supporters have begun a "save the Eagles" fund and their activists are currently touring the country in a fleet of old ambulances and brightly coloured derelict buses parking on public parks, golf courses and cricket piches to raise awareness of Palaces difficulties nationally.

Their campaigners can also be seen in local high streets up and down the land selling lucky heather and pegs or occaisionally copies of the big issue. These plucky fundraisers can be identified by the strong smell of stale piss Asda super strength white cider and deep fried condemned chicken which is the distinctive smell of Croydon.

Previous successful campaigns included lying in a soiled sleeping bag next to cashpoints asking for change for a cup of tea and selling dime bags of crystal meth. All these campaigns,overseen by Jordan,have contributed to a fighting fund of £23.45.

Points of interest
Crystal Palace also famously managed to misspell their own name on their club crest in the 2005-06 season. They are therefore widely now known as "Chrystal Palace" in honour of this towering incompetence.

Palace have never won a major trophy

Crystal Palace is an anagram of "A Crap Tale"

Crystal Palace is an anagram of "A Crap Tale...No it isn't!
On which caravan site were you 'tutored'?

 

[Danny-Boy]

I'd say she was a virgin...amazing!!

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

Crystal Palace is an anagram of "A Crap Tale...No it isn't!
On which caravan site were you 'tutored'?

Agreed...the anagram misses a couple of letters but what the hey..you have to agree with the rest of the piece though. Excellent observations.

 

[Danny-Boy]

I always think that the entry for Sport on the Croydon page of the Uncyclopedia says it all as far as I'm concerned...

This ones for you Stupor Neils Gash Barmy...

"[edit] Sport
Croydon is home to Crystal Palace F.C, though the club insists it's part of London no one in London has ever heard of it. The local soccer team, Crystal Palace FC, is probably most famous for rearing Ashley Cole to be the bright pansy he is nowadays and celebrity twat Ian Wright. In its 1990s heyday the club hit the headlines because Manchester Uniteds celebrated gobshite Eric Cantona achieved national hero status there after beating a fan senseless. Crystal Palace currently rejoice in their 5th title in as many years in the "Most Ludicrous Strip" competition a title they wrested from Lagos Vampires in 2004. The brightly coloured Clown outfit designed by Simon Jordan and based on the burlesque Harlequin has caused hilarity among opposing fans ever since.

Structure
Crystal Palace chairman Simon Jordan epitomises Croydon, and is somewhat of a local treasure idolised by the subnormal retards that follow Palace who famously share his love for bleached hair, bling, closetness, orange skin, greasy attire and arrogant tosser attitude. It was confirmed in 2009 Jordan is to continue with his highly rated ladies perfume range and move to self tanners.

Financial structure
Jordans business empire, built on his market stall "Simons knick knacks", selling fake "Channel" sunglasses, and "Bolex" wristwatches ceased trading in August 2009 and this is expected to cause CPFC to slide into frinancial difficulties. Supporters have begun a "save the Eagles" fund and their activists are currently touring the country in a fleet of old ambulances and brightly coloured derelict buses parking on public parks, golf courses and cricket piches to raise awareness of Palaces difficulties nationally.

Their campaigners can also be seen in local high streets up and down the land selling lucky heather and pegs or occaisionally copies of the big issue. These plucky fundraisers can be identified by the strong smell of stale piss Asda super strength white cider and deep fried condemned chicken which is the distinctive smell of Croydon.

Previous successful campaigns included lying in a soiled sleeping bag next to cashpoints asking for change for a cup of tea and selling dime bags of crystal meth. All these campaigns,overseen by Jordan,have contributed to a fighting fund of £23.45.

Points of interest
Crystal Palace also famously managed to misspell their own name on their club crest in the 2005-06 season. They are therefore widely now known as "Chrystal Palace" in honour of this towering incompetence.

Palace have never won a major trophy

Crystal Palace is an anagram of "A Crap Tale"

Ermm...what does it say about Albion then?

 

[SE25]

The thread has been moved off the main board - faggots!

 

[Braders]

The thread has been moved off the main board - faggots!

hardly a suprise now , is it?

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

The thread has been moved off the main board - faggots!

Maybe we've had enough of your hilarious traveller humour and want to get on with some intelligent banter?

 

[SE25]

Maybe we've had enough of your hilarious traveller humour and want to get on with some intelligent banter?

Maybe you can't take the piss being ripped out of you and have to ban people!

 

[Sweeney Todd]

Maybe you can't take the piss being ripped out of you and have to ban people!

There's a difference between football-related banter and a barrage of witless anti-gay jibes, don't you think? Speaking of which, take a look at the Come & Have A Go page on Holmesdale.net. Do the morons who post Albion-related homophobic rants on that page seriously think they are funny?

As for ripping the piss, it's the people who take the piss who can't take the piss being taken out of them.

 

[The Phoenix]

I always think that the entry for Sport on the Croydon page of the Uncyclopedia says it all as far as I'm concerned...

This ones for you Stupor Neils Gash Barmy...

"[edit] Sport
Croydon is home to Crystal Palace F.C, though the club insists it's part of London no one in London has ever heard of it. The local soccer team, Crystal Palace FC, is probably most famous for rearing Ashley Cole to be the bright pansy he is nowadays and celebrity twat Ian Wright. In its 1990s heyday the club hit the headlines because Manchester Uniteds celebrated gobshite Eric Cantona achieved national hero status there after beating a fan senseless. Crystal Palace currently rejoice in their 5th title in as many years in the "Most Ludicrous Strip" competition a title they wrested from Lagos Vampires in 2004. The brightly coloured Clown outfit designed by Simon Jordan and based on the burlesque Harlequin has caused hilarity among opposing fans ever since.

Structure
Crystal Palace chairman Simon Jordan epitomises Croydon, and is somewhat of a local treasure idolised by the subnormal retards that follow Palace who famously share his love for bleached hair, bling, closetness, orange skin, greasy attire and arrogant tosser attitude. It was confirmed in 2009 Jordan is to continue with his highly rated ladies perfume range and move to self tanners.

Financial structure
Jordans business empire, built on his market stall "Simons knick knacks", selling fake "Channel" sunglasses, and "Bolex" wristwatches ceased trading in August 2009 and this is expected to cause CPFC to slide into frinancial difficulties. Supporters have begun a "save the Eagles" fund and their activists are currently touring the country in a fleet of old ambulances and brightly coloured derelict buses parking on public parks, golf courses and cricket piches to raise awareness of Palaces difficulties nationally.

Their campaigners can also be seen in local high streets up and down the land selling lucky heather and pegs or occaisionally copies of the big issue. These plucky fundraisers can be identified by the strong smell of stale piss Asda super strength white cider and deep fried condemned chicken which is the distinctive smell of Croydon.

Previous successful campaigns included lying in a soiled sleeping bag next to cashpoints asking for change for a cup of tea and selling dime bags of crystal meth. All these campaigns,overseen by Jordan,have contributed to a fighting fund of £23.45.

Points of interest
Crystal Palace also famously managed to misspell their own name on their club crest in the 2005-06 season. They are therefore widely now known as "Chrystal Palace" in honour of this towering incompetence.

Palace have never won a major trophy

Crystal Palace is an anagram of "A Crap Tale"

Who's gonna own up to writing this crap?

Fairly obvious it was a Brightoner, since you lot are the only people in the football league thick enough to think Crystal Palace Football Club is based in Croydon. Congrats.

Most stuff on uncyclopedia is quite good, and funny. Sadly, this isn't a part of the category. When stretching the truth in these sorts of articles, such as the club crest mispelling, the stretch of the truth is meant to be amusing. Not just shit. Diadora mispelt the name, not Palace. The mispelling was only on the bottom left hand side of the shirt, on the little tag thing about a square inch big, not on the main crest.

For a bunch of guys who are trying to show up how thick SNSA is, you're not doing too well, and plummetting to further depths of idiocy.

 

[The Grockle]

Who's gonna own up to writing this crap?

Fairly obvious it was a Brightoner, since you lot are the only people in the football league thick enough to think Crystal Palace Football Club is based in Croydon. Congrats.

Most stuff on uncyclopedia is quite good, and funny. Sadly, this isn't a part of the category. When stretching the truth in these sorts of articles, such as the club crest mispelling, the stretch of the truth is meant to be amusing. Not just shit. Diadora mispelt the name, not Palace. The mispelling was only on the bottom left hand side of the shirt, on the little tag thing about a square inch big, not on the main crest.

For a bunch of guys who are trying to show up how thick SNSA is, you're not doing too well, and plummetting to further depths of idiocy.

SELHURST PARK IS IN THE LONDON BOROUGH OF CROYDON! So yeah CHrystal Palace is based IN CROYDON.

 

[The Grockle]

SELHURST PARK IS IN THE LONDON BOROUGH OF CROYDON! So yeah CHrystal Palace is based IN CROYDON.

Googled it yet?

 

[The Phoenix]

SELHURST PARK IS IN THE LONDON BOROUGH OF CROYDON! So yeah CHrystal Palace is based IN CROYDON.

The club's address is:

Selhurst Park Stadium
Holmesdale Road
London
SE25 6PU

There is no mention of Croydon in that. The address also does not have a Croydon post code. If it were in Croydon, it would have a CRO post code. However, it doesn't. It has an SE25, London post code, despite the borough having been drawn up to have Selhurst within it, for administrative reasons.

The borough is named Croydon, because the London Authorities like to divide stuff up and name it. It doesn't mean much. Whenever anyone talks about Croydon, they mean the large town. If anyone wants to refer to any of the other areas within the London Borough, they refer to those area's names.

As I say, I've never heard anybody else claim that Crystal Palace FC is a Croydon club, except for you lot, just like I've never heard anyone say that West Ham is a Newham club, or that QPR is a "Hammersmith and Fulham" club.

 

[The Phoenix]

Googled it yet?

Are you talking to yourself? If not, you should perhaps take your own advice anyway.

 

[Sweeney Todd]

Are you talking to yourself? If not, you should perhaps take your own advice anyway.

Childish ramblings...

 

[The Grockle]

The club's address is:

Selhurst Park Stadium
Holmesdale Road
London
SE25 6PU

There is no mention of Croydon in that. The address also does not have a Croydon post code. If it were in Croydon, it would have a CRO post code. However, it doesn't. It has an SE25, London post code, despite the borough having been drawn up to have Selhurst within it, for administrative reasons.

The borough is named Croydon, because the London Authorities like to divide stuff up and name it. It doesn't mean much. Whenever anyone talks about Croydon, they mean the large town. If anyone wants to refer to any of the other areas within the London Borough, they refer to those area's names.

As I say, I've never heard anybody else claim that Crystal Palace FC is a Croydon club, except for you lot, just like I've never heard anyone say that West Ham is a Newham club, or that QPR is a "Hammersmith and Fulham" club.

A fair few places in the Borough of Croydon have London postcodes such as parts of Thornton Heath, Woodside Green and South Norwood to name a few.

Palace IS a LONDON CLUB but is based IN CROYDON numbnuts which explains why people describe Palace as being based in CROYDON.

Your disputing the facts with the wrong person too, as i live about 750 meters from Selhurst Park.

 

[algie]

Ha ha,Palace fans trying to deny they come under Croydon Borough.Can't blame them though can you? It is a complete shit hole and this is from someone who use to work there,have family there and brought up in London.The only good thing about that dump is the A23 out of there.To be fair though most of London is a shit hole.

 

[The Phoenix]

Could you direct me to where I claimed Selhurst isn't in the Croydon Borough?

Croydonseagull... Ask a bunch of people from "Fornton 'Eaff", Woodside and South Norwood if they are from Croydon and they will tell you that they're not, they're from Thornton Heath, Woodside or South Norwood. Living near Palace's ground, I doubt many of your neighbours would claim to be from Croydon. All that's Croydon about Palace is that it falls within what the GLA decides to call the "Croydon Borough" for political, administrative reasons. If we're saying that what they say is what goes, then your lot better start admitting that Croydon is South London.