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Friday Joke Apparently Wolves have approached Rivaldo. David Jones said "We sort of got the answer we were exepecting, but you don't get anywhere if you don't ask!!"

Cheesey Joke A man goes to his bank manager. Man: I'd like to borrow £200,000 to set up in the cheesmaking business. Bank Manager: And where were you going to set up this business. Man: A little place in Somerset called Cheddar. There's a nice gorge there and some caves. It's really lovely...

A man walks into the doctors with a Frog growing out of his head. "What seems to be the problem?" says the doctor. "Well it all started with this pimple on my arse!" says the frog!

MAN: Doctor - I wonder if you can help me. I have 3 problems - 1 related to my work place, 1 related to my home life, and 1 that is purely personal. DOC: OK lets start with the work related issue. MAN: Well it's my secreatry. She a complete nympho. I get to work in the morning and she's...

Chas & Dave and Eminem releasing "knees up Motherf**ker"

A man goes to the doctors. He says to the doctor "I can't pronounce words beginning with eff or tee aitch" The doctor says "You can't say fairer than that"

I'll never forget during the war my dad used to say "If a bombs got your name on it there's nothing you can do about it!" That used to worry our neighbours Mr & Mrs Doodlebug!

A man walks into a dentist's surgery and says, "Excuse me, can you help me. I think I'm a moth." Dentist: "You don't need a dentist. You need a psychiatrist." Man: "Yes, I know." Dentist: "So why did you come in here?" Man: "The light was on..."

A lorry load of red paint collides with a lorry load of blue paint. Both drivers were marooned

I said to my gym instructor "can you teach me to do the splits" - she said "how flexible are you" - I said " I can't do tuesdays!!" This dyslexic walks into a bra Another dyslexic goes to a toga party dressed as a goat

Steve Kember: I'm going to get some new training bibs for the first team. Simon Jordan: That'll be a good swap!!