How long should you wait before dating after a breakup?

[ees complicated no?]

Basically, I've just split up with my girlfriend of nearly 4 years over the weekend and it's not over bad terms, we are still speaking and we still know we 'love each other' but not in the way we used to, but just as really good friends if that makes any sense.

So yh, what do the great people on NSC think the time period should be before meeting new people

 

[marshy68]

the sooner you shag someone else the better in my opinion.

 

[kano]

after 4 year relationship minimum 6 months of going on the lash and pulling randoms before you start 'dating'

 

[nwgull]

Get back into it ASAP. You don't want anything serious; any normal woman would be very wary of dating a bloke who has only just split up from a long term relationship. However, if you don't get out there and enjoy the single life, you may end up drifting back into your previous relationship, and there was obviously a good reason why you ended it in the first place. Oh, and chances are that despite acting all innocent and demure, your ex wll be getting banged by a different bloke every weekend as well, so it helps prevent any feelings of jealousy or resentment towards her.

 

[Silkster365]

Based on how you have worded your post I'd suggest you need to cut each other out completely for 6 months so you can properly understand how you feel about each other. It sounds a bit confused at the moment? Whilst it's like that, seeing each other will only make things more complicated/confusing. You need to feel single

 

[mistahclarke]

You have NSC's permission to go and bang who you want and enjoy single life. Do NOT get too involved with anyone, don't jump into any sort of relationship or you'll be back where you started.

Break all contact for a few weeks with the ex before you end up back together and going through the motions again.

 

[jackanada]

I think 'get drunk and shag some strange' is an important part of the recovery process.

I used to go for a 1month fallow for each year of a relationship rule of thumb. However ladies tend to go for a more practical approach of having firmed up your replacement before any break up. So now I say just get in there. Possibly with someone much younger so you can put on an Alan Partridge voice and say "cashback!"

 

[ees complicated no?]

 

[forumwayseagull]

Go for whatever takes your fancy...GUILT FREE. Enjoy yourself and follow your own instincts... Remember you only live once...

Watch the movie forgetting sarah Marshall and you will see the women is usually already being banged by someone else....( good movie, funny side to breaking up)

Oh yea for what it's worth chance your arm as now you have nothing to lose...I was in a dead end reationship for 14 years...got out of it and met the women of my dreams, never would have happened if I played safe and stuck to some shitty pretence we may get back together... That was 2 and half years ago, never looked back.....

 

[sparkie]

Enjoy being able to do exacty what you want, when you want. And spending your money on anything YOU want.

When you get bored of this, is the time to start again.

 

[albion534]

It all depends on how you feel yourself, there isn't a rule of thumb about how long you should wait, I usually find its about 6 months before I start seeing someone else! But that's just me, other people are different

Gettig smashed and waking up next to a Munter usually helps

 

[00snook]

I split up with a long term partner, had some time on my own and now am married to the greatest woman on earth.

Contrary to others opinions I think spending some time without women in your life allows you to realise what you want, rather than running about trying to get laid. Personally I feel this is more
Constructive, but no doubt you will prefer the advice of the others.

Either way remember that women are like fireworks. You should never go back.

 

[Hatterlovesbrighton]

rebound sex yes.

Serious dating not for a while.

 

[vegster]

Don't wait for your dick to dry out from the last one, get straight back in.

 

[Biscuit]

[MENTION=18963]ees complicated, no?[/MENTION] can I ask how old you are mate?

Sorry to hear about the breakup. That's never nice

I'd say forget the advice on here and do what makes you happy. Watch some boxsets, go on the piss with mates and start being a bit selfish with your time. You'll soon be in a better place.

 

[KZNSeagull]

Based upon your last poll option, I think you should resolve any outstanding issues with your relationship that you both may have. If you go off shagging everything that moves, the chances are that a future reconciliation would be less likely. I would suggest you spend your time apart thinking about what you want, not playing the field.

The most important thing is to be brutally honest with yourself and her.

As an aside, I am not sure that NSC, the home of "cooor, I'd ruin her" and "Cooor, I'd like to smash her back doors in" is really the place that you are going to get solid relationship advice! Hope that helps!

 

[The Sock of Poskett]

ALL relationships go through rocky periods. As you've been together four years, and you seem to be suggesting you're quite likely to get back together again, seems to me that after a bit of a cooling off period you both need to be trying again.

However, I'd hope you have some close friends you both trust and respect who would give you good advice, rather than NSC which doesn't really know you from Adam! (whoever he is)

 

[perseus]

Fools Rush In

Its an even bet that you will make the same mistakes twice. Most people seem to choose unsuitable types.

 

[Seagull27]

If you'd come on here and said you'd broken up and wanted to move on, then I agree that shagging around a bit doesn't hurt. It's good to build up your confidence by seeing a few other girls, without letting it get serious until you're ready for it.

However, if you really want to get back with her (and think that she might in the future too - that bit is important!) then I'd be a bit wary. Go out with your mates, enjoy yourself and stuff, but if she gets wind of you sleeping around, that'll be the point where she thinks it's fine to do the same and will move on. And women are a hell of a lot better at that than us, I've found.

 

[Perkino]

This is crying out for