Half Man Half Biscuit
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For the whole article with a hideous photo of Ken Bates and his electric fence, Millwall's old Den and Northampton's away end etc CLICK HERE. Otherwise:
The Fence Connection by Larry from Lancing
Fences. Not lap, panel or picket and not a drop of cuprinol or creosote in sight. From the late 70’s through to the early 1990’s the football landscape was defined by twisted, cold steel and football fans themselves were defined as a species best kept in cages.
In the days where Sky now offer a rather surreal 3D visual football experience (err isn’t that called going to the game?) for 15 odd years we had to endure fence vision. That’s where a game of football is enjoyed through small square holes in the fence. If you’ve never enjoyed this visual treat then next time you go to a game whip out the mesh that sits on top of your grill pan (kids, ask your mum before putting your head in the oven to remove it), strap it across your chops and hey presto you can enjoy the beauty of fence vision.
So, why a guilty pleasure? Well, fences were a killer, it took the tragedy of Hillsborough for the world to see that caging people into small spaces wasn’t particularly clever, it says a great deal about the world that various breeds of animals had won this debate many years before football fans. Chickens of course remain divided on the issue, some enjoy the free range lifestyle, whilst others still endure a cramped and caged existence ala a 1980’s football ground. Trust me, their day will come as Hugh Duncan Fearnley Cricket Bat Whatshisname banishes fences from chicken houses, just as Lord Taylor did from football grounds. Of course fences weren’t the main reason for football tragedies, but they were indelibly associated with the conditions that contributed to them.
Dangerous, inhumane and demeaning. I would never want to see them back, but there was something about them wasn’t there, and here’s the guilty pleasure. They defined an era when football grounds weren’t particularly pleasant places to be, which was good because that meant only people who loved football, fighting and sometimes both together, were attracted to them. It meant that admission was affordable and sub cultures and a way of life flourished untainted by the gaze of the media, or the ill gotten gains of the Russian mafia and the omnipresent “Eastern based businessman.”
Fences also served an important role as a life preserver. When in 1985 the bearded, lumbering goal poacher Mick Ferguson netted late on for the Albion to end Millwall’s long running unbeaten home record, if you’d asked the 500 or so travelling fans if they thought fences were a good idea you would have been met with an enthusiasm akin to that displayed by Tiger Woods when asked to present the awards at the Waitress of the Year conference. A resounding yes.
Some things though never change, and it seems the top clubs had the best fences. Div 1 teams of the day had fences that fitted the architecture of the ground. Everton’s had a lovely symmetry to them, nice wide squares to aid the viewing experience and a bar across the top which enabled the much missed art of fence hanging in celebration of a goal. Old Trafford’s were red lengths of steel which lent themselves perfectly to having a bar scarf lovingly tied to them.
Today’s high flying Chelsea were by and large scrabbling around Division 2 when fences were in their prime. As JT continues to demonstrate, Chelsea rarely display any class in anything they do and so it was with fences. Captain Bates topped the Bridge fences with barbed wire, and get this, electrified them! You couldn’t make it up, but yes it happened.
Take a trip to the lower leagues and the fences were more like the ones you see on a 1970’s housing estate, horrible concrete poles binding together a cheap chicken wire creation. The epitome of this approach was demonstrated by the Heysel stadium. That fencing wouldn’t have kept back Bernard Matthews’ turkeys, let alone thousands of scousers. Not footballs, or come to that, fences finest hour.
Northampton Town take my top prize in the fencing stakes. On my first trip there the crowd segregation and fencing was provided by the boundary rope from the neighbouring cricket ground. Very quaint, but one felt it left the club a tad exposed to the more excitable elements. So it proved on that day, as each goal was met with spillage onto the pitch. Roll the clock forward a few years and Northampton had invested in a spare aviary cage from the local zoo. Not only were we fenced in to the left, right and front, those forward thinking burghers had added a wire roof. Genius, can’t think why it never caught on.
Back in the day it was impossible to imagine a ground without fencing, now they are long gone and as all TV clips only go as far back as the re-invention of football by Sky in the early 90’s, there’s a whole generation who have never experience or seen on TV “fence vision.” They will never have seen those fences separating fans with that little bit of no mans land a line of coppers. Visually a much more exciting sight than that awful strip of carpet used to separate fans these days.
My favourite fence moment came at the Goldstone some time in the late 80’s. The Goldstone North Stand fences were a bit worse for wear, many of the spikes got damaged in a mad scramble to get away from invading Arsenal fans during a League Cup tie in 1980. With the away fans in the North East corner, on the day in question we were stood next to them, within good old fashioned baiting distance. As we scored, a chap called Merlin decided to take a running jump onto the fence in celebration, not of course realising that this was an exit fence on which the lock had been undone...in slow motion and with Merlin clutching on the fence gently swung backwards into the no mans land area. Delight and delirium was quickly replaced by a feeling of being somewhat exposed!
A bit like other guilty pleasures of youth, they are not something to be particularly proud of, though they felt right at the time and added to the sense of theatre that is so lacking today.
The Fence Connection by Larry from Lancing
Fences. Not lap, panel or picket and not a drop of cuprinol or creosote in sight. From the late 70’s through to the early 1990’s the football landscape was defined by twisted, cold steel and football fans themselves were defined as a species best kept in cages.
In the days where Sky now offer a rather surreal 3D visual football experience (err isn’t that called going to the game?) for 15 odd years we had to endure fence vision. That’s where a game of football is enjoyed through small square holes in the fence. If you’ve never enjoyed this visual treat then next time you go to a game whip out the mesh that sits on top of your grill pan (kids, ask your mum before putting your head in the oven to remove it), strap it across your chops and hey presto you can enjoy the beauty of fence vision.
So, why a guilty pleasure? Well, fences were a killer, it took the tragedy of Hillsborough for the world to see that caging people into small spaces wasn’t particularly clever, it says a great deal about the world that various breeds of animals had won this debate many years before football fans. Chickens of course remain divided on the issue, some enjoy the free range lifestyle, whilst others still endure a cramped and caged existence ala a 1980’s football ground. Trust me, their day will come as Hugh Duncan Fearnley Cricket Bat Whatshisname banishes fences from chicken houses, just as Lord Taylor did from football grounds. Of course fences weren’t the main reason for football tragedies, but they were indelibly associated with the conditions that contributed to them.
Dangerous, inhumane and demeaning. I would never want to see them back, but there was something about them wasn’t there, and here’s the guilty pleasure. They defined an era when football grounds weren’t particularly pleasant places to be, which was good because that meant only people who loved football, fighting and sometimes both together, were attracted to them. It meant that admission was affordable and sub cultures and a way of life flourished untainted by the gaze of the media, or the ill gotten gains of the Russian mafia and the omnipresent “Eastern based businessman.”
Fences also served an important role as a life preserver. When in 1985 the bearded, lumbering goal poacher Mick Ferguson netted late on for the Albion to end Millwall’s long running unbeaten home record, if you’d asked the 500 or so travelling fans if they thought fences were a good idea you would have been met with an enthusiasm akin to that displayed by Tiger Woods when asked to present the awards at the Waitress of the Year conference. A resounding yes.
Some things though never change, and it seems the top clubs had the best fences. Div 1 teams of the day had fences that fitted the architecture of the ground. Everton’s had a lovely symmetry to them, nice wide squares to aid the viewing experience and a bar across the top which enabled the much missed art of fence hanging in celebration of a goal. Old Trafford’s were red lengths of steel which lent themselves perfectly to having a bar scarf lovingly tied to them.
Today’s high flying Chelsea were by and large scrabbling around Division 2 when fences were in their prime. As JT continues to demonstrate, Chelsea rarely display any class in anything they do and so it was with fences. Captain Bates topped the Bridge fences with barbed wire, and get this, electrified them! You couldn’t make it up, but yes it happened.
Take a trip to the lower leagues and the fences were more like the ones you see on a 1970’s housing estate, horrible concrete poles binding together a cheap chicken wire creation. The epitome of this approach was demonstrated by the Heysel stadium. That fencing wouldn’t have kept back Bernard Matthews’ turkeys, let alone thousands of scousers. Not footballs, or come to that, fences finest hour.
Northampton Town take my top prize in the fencing stakes. On my first trip there the crowd segregation and fencing was provided by the boundary rope from the neighbouring cricket ground. Very quaint, but one felt it left the club a tad exposed to the more excitable elements. So it proved on that day, as each goal was met with spillage onto the pitch. Roll the clock forward a few years and Northampton had invested in a spare aviary cage from the local zoo. Not only were we fenced in to the left, right and front, those forward thinking burghers had added a wire roof. Genius, can’t think why it never caught on.
Back in the day it was impossible to imagine a ground without fencing, now they are long gone and as all TV clips only go as far back as the re-invention of football by Sky in the early 90’s, there’s a whole generation who have never experience or seen on TV “fence vision.” They will never have seen those fences separating fans with that little bit of no mans land a line of coppers. Visually a much more exciting sight than that awful strip of carpet used to separate fans these days.
My favourite fence moment came at the Goldstone some time in the late 80’s. The Goldstone North Stand fences were a bit worse for wear, many of the spikes got damaged in a mad scramble to get away from invading Arsenal fans during a League Cup tie in 1980. With the away fans in the North East corner, on the day in question we were stood next to them, within good old fashioned baiting distance. As we scored, a chap called Merlin decided to take a running jump onto the fence in celebration, not of course realising that this was an exit fence on which the lock had been undone...in slow motion and with Merlin clutching on the fence gently swung backwards into the no mans land area. Delight and delirium was quickly replaced by a feeling of being somewhat exposed!
A bit like other guilty pleasures of youth, they are not something to be particularly proud of, though they felt right at the time and added to the sense of theatre that is so lacking today.
South Yorkshire Police f***ed up big time.
