[Humour] Joke du Jour

[el punal]

This is an old one but here goes :

Monica Lewinsky takes her dress to the dry cleaners. Unfortunately the lady behind the counter is hard of hearing.

Monica says “I would like this dress dry cleaned, unfortunately there’s a nasty stain on it.”

“Come again?” asks the dry cleaning lady.

“No, it’s soup.” replies Monica.

 

[schmunk]

What flavour?

 

[Dick Swiveller]

What flavour?

Cum, probably

 

[Is it PotG?]

If this was in America, surely the lady would reply 'I beg your pardon' or 'Excuse me', the preferred responses when something is not heard clearly.

 

[Guinness Boy]

What flavour?

I think that's the crux of the matter. If it was tomato then surely the old lady wouldn't have been able to mistake it for semen and Monica would have understood that she was merely a bit mutton. <- @Cheeky Monkey

 

[jcdenton08]

How do we know this to be true, source?

 

[schmunk]

I think that's the crux of the matter. If it was tomato then surely the old lady wouldn't have been able to mistake it for semen and Monica would have understood that she was merely a bit mutton. <- @Cheeky Monkey

Glue ear...?

 

[schmunk]

How do we know this to be true, source?

No, it was definitely soup.

 

[Not Andy Naylor]

Surely the lesson here is that political correctness has forced this business to take on staff who are clearly not up to the job. What next? The visually impaired building nuclear reactors?

 

[maltaseagull]

How do we know this to be true, source?

It was soup not source !

 

[TugWilson]

What flavour?

BJ and probably Pork .

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

Scotsman, Irishman, Welshman and a German walk into a bar.
There would normally be an Englishman in this joke, he is still at the world cup.

 

[Icy Gull]

Scotsman, Irishman, Welshman and a German walk into a bar.
There would normally be an Englishman in this joke, he is still at the world cup.

 

[Guinness Boy]

Scotsman, Irishman, Welshman and a German walk into a bar.
There would normally be an Englishman in this joke, he is still at the world cup.

Sounds very sensible, especially if he's one of the players. I'd imagine that if a player walked into a bar he'd be asked all sorts of awkward questions about the resulting injuries and would likely be subject to a concussion protocol.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Scotsman, Irishman, Welshman and a German walk into a bar.
There would normally be an Englishman in this joke, he is still at the world cup.

You're not very funny

 

[hart's shirt]

You're not very funny

What's blue, has 2 wings and hasn't flown south for the winter?

The Scottish football team's plane.

 

[KZNSeagull]

You're not very funny

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

Heseus!

You cannot be serious!!!

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

You're not very funny

Truth hurts doesn't it...

On a serious note, I recently was amazed to discover copper wire was invented by two Scotsmen fighting over a penny.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Truth hurts doesn't it...

On a serious note, I recently was amazed to discover copper wire was invented by two Scotsmen fighting over a penny.

Racialist