[Albion] Things which are not currently criminal offences but which absolutely should be

[BensGrandad]

People who let their children stand in shopping trolleys meant for the goods purchased.

 

[BensGrandad]

Anyone who drinks Fosters, Strongbow, Carlsberg, John Smiths or Heineken in a pub or elsewhere. There is such a fantastic array of beers, lagers and ciders out there. Why?

Perhaps it is because they like the taste and dont wish to sound pretentious or superior.

 

[Me and my Monkey]

People standing still in supermarket aisles, rooted to the spot, staring into space as if having just been shot by some kind of tranquilliser dart. The worst place for this is Asda, where culprits tend to have huge arses, and dozens of similarly huge arsed children, making any attempt by other shoppers to move forwards (or backwards, even) entirely futile.

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

People who let their children stand in shopping trolleys meant for the goods purchased.

I bet you never made a go-cart

 

[Frutos]

A poorer described burger should be punishable by death.

If I order a Bacon, Cheese Burger. I expect that it will be a bread bun (maybe even a brioche bun) containing bacon, cheese and a burger.

I don't want Mayonnaise. I hate it.
I don't want a lettuce leaf
I don't want a tomato.

If you own a restaurant or even some shithouse burger place at least specify it comes with 'Chef's special sauce' and 'Wanky side salad' so I can tell you not to bother.

Totally agree.

You should be asked whether you want all the extra crap rather than it automatically being assumed you want something you didn't order.

 

[BensGrandad]

I bet you never made a go-cart

Sorry cannot see the relevance.

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

Sorry cannot see the relevance.

ok Grandad

 

[Guinness Boy]

Walking around with acid.

A bloke I used to know during the height of the rave days in the early 90s can confirm that's very illegal indeed.

 

[DavidRyder]

People (or more specifically, the woman behind me at work), who, when told that someone has slept with someone else, says 'Shut.Up'!

The dramatic pause in the middle - like someone had just told her that California has fallen into the sea or summat.

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

Perhaps it is because they like the taste and dont wish to sound pretentious or superior.

You mean you don't fancy putting your pint of the usual to one side and trying some foamy, hoppy Mongolian craft ale that's been infused with the fruity notes of musk ox semen and triple strained through a yak's ring piece BG?

 

[BensGrandad]

You mean you don't fancy putting your pint of the usual to one side and trying some foamy, hoppy Mongolian craft ale that's been infused with the fruity notes of musk ox semen and triple strained through a yak's ring piece BG?

I dont drink any of those drinks mentioned but millions do so they cant be all bad.

 

[vegster]

Starting a have a moan thread masquerading as a jurisprudence thread.

People who leave large gaps in front of them in a cue..

Anti protest protests.

Using First instead of only.

People who doe this, below, it should be legal to trip them or punch them as you go past..

This is not strictly an accurate picture, they usually have ear pieces in and will be clutching a Costa/Starbucks in their other hand.....then you should be able to thump them or if you work for Brighton and Hove busses, a little flick of the steering when will enable them to be despatched via wing mirror.

 

[looney]

This is not strictly an accurate picture, they usually have ear pieces in and will be clutching a Costa/Starbucks in their other hand.....then you should be able to thump them or if you work for Brighton and Hove busses, a little flick of the steering when will enable them to be despatched via wing mirror.

The Ultimate I have come across while on a pushbike on a bridal path was a jogger wearing headphones with a dog on one of those telescopic leads.

People who do that should be deported to Raqqa.

 

[Goldstone1976]

Doing strange things at a wedding - jogging or cycling, say.

 

[DavidRyder]

People saying 'My bad'.

 

[pearl]

CAMRA men

 

[happypig]

People who describe a cup of coffee or a bit of cake as "awesome".

An erupting volcano or a tsunami is awesome, a beverage isn't.

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

Commentators who says goals when meaning the singular goal (northern idiots normally).

 

[Trufflehound]

some foamy, hoppy Mongolian craft ale that's been infused with the fruity notes of musk ox semen and triple strained through a yak's ring piece

I've not tried that one yet, but I have had a hoppy Swedish craft ale infused with the perfumed notes of beaver musk.









It was effing disgusting...

 

[aberllefenni]

People who use management speak.

Lets run it up the flagpole and see if it salutes. Only if I can punch you in the face and see if it bleeds.