My mums match report

[jackanada]

Sent my mother along as I couldn't make last game. Below is her match report.

Well it was very wet and cold and I had a pie . Lualua is my favourite. Some Spanish person back from injury was rather good. I'm not sure that's good enough, but Brighton seem to be better at trying, and indeed succeeding, at scoring goals, at which they have been a bit crap recently. I left 10 mins early due to hypothermia. El Abd remains badly behaved boy, but not booked. The stadium is fab. Sorry about poor report, but have been out for supper since, downing warming red wine. X

 

[downham seagull]

Beats Alan Green any day!

 

[Soulman]

Nothing said about the brilliant offside trap then?

 

[smeariestbat]

or any mention of the score, which is usually quite useful in a match report.

 

[Horsham Gull]

beats anything ANDY NAYLOR writes

 

[Eksman]

Well atleast we got a kiss!

 

[grubbyhands]

Better than the whole of Cantors' /Aspinall commentary by a country mile.

 

[Worthingite]

HB&B, Naylor & Mendoza haven't got shit on your ma!!!! Send her to every game - I would read her updates quite happily!!!!

 

[Horsham Gull]

Can we send her to Gus' Press conferences instead of Tim?

 

[el_ciddy]

Sign her up.

 

[Deleted User X18H]

HB&B, Naylor & Mendoza haven't got shit on your ma!!!! Send her to every game - I would read her updates quite happily!!!!

Can we send her to Gus' Press conferences instead of Tim?

Who are these people?

 

[severnside gull]

pretty accurate summary really - especially re AEA

 

[Stevie Boy]

absolute quailty

 

[jackanada]

As we live in the information age I shall not ask my ma to include the score or scorers in future match reports.
Also as it has taken me 30 years to get her to learn the universally accepted symbol for play so she can perform the basic operation of a DVD player (VCR when started) I shall not be trying to explain offside to her.
I'm very proud she knows who El-Abd is would live to see her tell him off for being naughty.

 

[Kazenga <3]

Well atleast we got a kiss!

Nah she can eff off to seagullschat if she's gonna turn this place into facebook like before.

 

[smeariestbat]

Nah she can eff off to seagullschat if she's gonna turn this place into facebook like before.

lol hun xxx

 

[Sergei's Celebration]

or any mention of the score, which is usually quite useful in a match report.

It says we were better at succeeding in scoring goals what more do you want to know?

 

[Tony Towner's Fridge]

Sent my mother along as I couldn't make last game. Below is her match report.

Well it was very wet and cold and I had a pie . Lualua is my favourite. Some Spanish person back from injury was rather good. I'm not sure that's good enough, but Brighton seem to be better at trying, and indeed succeeding, at scoring goals, at which they have been a bit crap recently. I left 10 mins early due to hypothermia. El Abd remains badly behaved boy, but not booked. The stadium is fab. Sorry about poor report, but have been out for supper since, downing warming red wine. X

Kwality! Argus would do well to sign your Mum up. Why no Harveys at half time though?

Shame, but still good.

TNBA

TTF

 

[bhafc99]

Fantastic, make this a regular feature please.

 

[Woodchip]

Seen worse match reports in the national press.