Ernest
Stupid IDIOT
I don't THINK you can BEAT the FEELING of standing at the BAR of the CLIFTONVILLE deliberating WHETHER to have an EXTRA sausage with a LARGE Full ENGLISH or an EXTRA slice of BLACK Pudding and THEN ordering BOTH.
AS I sat ENJOYING my FRIDAY treat my SAUCE slipped DISCREETLY into the seat opposite and TOLD me he HAD some MASSIVE news on the TRANSFER front. I said was Andrew CRUFTS coming home as was the RUMOUR but he SAID no THAT was still only a RUMOUR and he HAD no fresh LEADS on whether CRUFTS would be at the AMEX. But HE said GUS has JUST agreed TERMS to SING Tomasz KUSZCZAK from Man UNITED I FELL off MY seat in SHOCK and I'm STILL feeling GIDDY an HOUR later. My SAUCE said that will BE announced shortly and I was the FIRST to know.
NEXT I had to ASK him about the GOSSIP I've heard about VINCENTELOT being UNHAPPY this week and my SAUCE confirmed it as being TRUE. Appararantly Martin Perry had BEEN put in CHARGE of the plans to convert that shithole Dicks BAR into ERNESTO'S and the LAPDOG had f***ed up the PLANNING permission and it WAS already RUNNING 2 years late and NO hope of opening this SEASON. VINCENTELOT was SEETHING at this news and was on the point of PACKING his bags to RETURN home and it TOOK his AMIGOS BURNO and INDIGO all their powers of PERSUASION to make him STAY and it's STILL 50/50 if HE will.
I finally ASKED him about the RUMOUR of another FAVOURITE returning and HE just placed HIS hand to his FOREHEAD smiled ENIGMATICALLY and SLIPPED into the FEVERISH crowds in George St leaving me to POLISH off my FINAL sausage ALONE.
AS I sat ENJOYING my FRIDAY treat my SAUCE slipped DISCREETLY into the seat opposite and TOLD me he HAD some MASSIVE news on the TRANSFER front. I said was Andrew CRUFTS coming home as was the RUMOUR but he SAID no THAT was still only a RUMOUR and he HAD no fresh LEADS on whether CRUFTS would be at the AMEX. But HE said GUS has JUST agreed TERMS to SING Tomasz KUSZCZAK from Man UNITED I FELL off MY seat in SHOCK and I'm STILL feeling GIDDY an HOUR later. My SAUCE said that will BE announced shortly and I was the FIRST to know.
NEXT I had to ASK him about the GOSSIP I've heard about VINCENTELOT being UNHAPPY this week and my SAUCE confirmed it as being TRUE. Appararantly Martin Perry had BEEN put in CHARGE of the plans to convert that shithole Dicks BAR into ERNESTO'S and the LAPDOG had f***ed up the PLANNING permission and it WAS already RUNNING 2 years late and NO hope of opening this SEASON. VINCENTELOT was SEETHING at this news and was on the point of PACKING his bags to RETURN home and it TOOK his AMIGOS BURNO and INDIGO all their powers of PERSUASION to make him STAY and it's STILL 50/50 if HE will.
I finally ASKED him about the RUMOUR of another FAVOURITE returning and HE just placed HIS hand to his FOREHEAD smiled ENIGMATICALLY and SLIPPED into the FEVERISH crowds in George St leaving me to POLISH off my FINAL sausage ALONE.
