Hans' photo-diary

[hans kraay fan club]

I'm beginning to like the fact you nicked my old NSC name.

Hans is eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevil.

Shpeshally for you mishter shimster, a lovely picture of Ellemieke that you might like to shet ash your deshktop background. [ash I have, of coursh].

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Hi, itsh me again. I had to work thish weekend. Here ish me working. I am kind of a Dutch Jeff Shtelling.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Here ish one of Ellemieke working. I like to think of her ash a Dutch Debbie Thrower.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Well...kind of like Debbie thrower anyway!

 

[Barrel of Fun]

This is a work of genius. It must be preserved for a long time.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Good day everybody. I have a shtinging ache of the head today. Lasht night we had a big function. Here ish me in my monky shuit.
I am managing very carefully not to get caught shtaring at the young lady. My friend ish looking a bit too excited though.

Jusht after thish he shaid he had to rush off to the toilet. Don't know what that wash about.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Mummy and Daddy were at the function alsho. Here ish the famous Hans Kraay Sr, trying to look hip and have a little boogie. Don't you hate it when your parentsh embarrassh you?

 

[Biscuit]

SUPERB.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

The lovely Ellemieke wash there alsho, at the do. I wanted to dansh with her, but it ish hard to dansh properly when you are not legally allowed within shixty feet of shomeone.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Hey everybody. Itsh Hansh here again. Shitty night lasht night. Went clubbing in Amshterdam with my palsh. Bashtard bounsher wouldn't let me in. Apparently I wash not dresshed according to the correct dressh code. Fascists.

 

[seagully]

This is possibly the funniest thing I have seen for a long time!

Awesome thread!

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Thatsh really good to hear, Thanksh. I need shome cheering up. I climbed the tree outshide Ellemieke's houshe again lasht night, hoping to catch her in her shmalls. What do I shee - only shome fat Port Vale shupporter, taking advantage of her freindly nature.

That Williamsh boy, ish in shooo much trouble I tell you. Next time he hash a little 'ShoccerAid for poor kidsh' thing, the Resht of the World shide have one new volunteer. The old 'Hansh is Eeeeevil' chantsh will be back that night, you'll shee.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Oh dear Mishter Williamsh, how could that have happened to your tyresh? Would you like me to order you a tackshi. Or maybe a one way flight shomewhere?

 

[seagully]

 

[Tony Meolas Loan Spell]

NSC Gold come on.....

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Hey everyone. Hansh ish back. Had to go away for a while ash there wash a little problem at work. I wash trying to inshtal a little camera devishe in Ellemeike's changing room, to help improve her shecurity. You never know what kind of shtalkersh she might attract.

Anyway, to cut a long shtory short, shomebody found it, and ash a reshult I wash shushpended, pending e review by pershonnel, whatever that meansh. I went to shtay in Belgium. I hate it there though - they all shpeak funny.

It took two weeksh, but eventually the CEO of the shtation, who happensh to play golf with Daddy [the very famoush Hansh Kraay Sr.] deshided that I had shuffered enough and shorted it all out.

Ellemieke wash not too happy and threw a hisshy fit. I don't mind though - itsh jusht her way of showing she cares.

Sho, today ish the firsht day back at work. Me and Ellemieke had to do a heartwarming animal shpot. It looksh pretty coshy don't you think?

Ellemieke ish shaying out of the corner of her mouth, "Move one insh closher and the puppy getsh it". Ellemieke ish sho funny.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

In hindshight, my suggeshtion about what she might like to do with the shtatue, may have caushed shome offensh.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Thish one ish of Ellemieke on the phone to her lawyer.

She really knowsh how to pull a great wind up. She ish hilarioush.

 

[moggy]

well it is a good thread after all

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Evening sheagullsh fansh. Itsh Hansh again.

Pretty depreshed now over the whole Ellemieke thing. I'm shtarting to think she ish playing a little tooo hard to get, sho I deshided to try shomething new. All of ush from work went to a bar at lunshtime for a shwift one. I shaw thish little hottie at the bar, and thought I could shpeak with her for a while to make Ellemieke jealoush.

Thish girl tellsh me to please go away, sho I did what any man would do and offered her 100 eurosh to talk with me. One of the guysh took thish pic with hish camera phone and now everyone thinksh I wash making an indeshent proposhal king of thing.